confusion.

confusion. The world was a blur, like dusty water and I was only a spec of dust floating to the sea floor. confusion. He was that spec of sunlight that bounded from one thing to the next. confusion. He was happy. fear. He had good grades, but everyone feared him because of his father. I was so goddam confused. Because that's the thing about depression it's not an eternity of sadness, but the absence of happiness and the continuous desperation for something to make sense. I was like a flame, dangerous and flickering from small emotions to overbearing ones. He wasn't like his father but at the same time he was, but I didn't fear him. He was the logical voice within the tangled screams in my head.

--

"Let me help you." He whispered. His brown eyes staring intently through his round glasses.
"You don't get it!" I yelled. "You can't! I'm frozen like this. You're like an ignorant bear thrashing at a frozen lake, wondering why he can't reach the one thing to heal his hunger. It's hopeless and idiotic." I hiss, my small hands clench into fists. I look down at my vans, unable to bare the sight of disappointment.

I felt soft fingers gently touch my chin and lift my face up. I met the gorgeous chocolate orbs that were wooden stakes to my heart. My heart thrashed against my ribs as his breath fanned my lips. His hand dropped, but before I could react his arms pulled me into an embrace. His head nestled into my neck and I didn't have the energy to fight back, so I melted into his arms.