Conan Hill is a trans male looking to escape his haunting past. He wants nothing more than to keep his head down and remain unnoticed at his new school, though that is quite difficult when the captain of the track team seems to have fallen for him.
*****
Life has been hard for Conan. In hopes of escaping past bullies and finding a fresh start where no one knows who he used to be, his family decides to move from Texas to Massachusetts. He makes a promise to himself that he will survive high school by going unnoticed and avoiding any conflict that might reveal his former identity. But this ends up being more difficult than expected when the school's golden boy and popular jock, Owen Wilson, takes up a keen interest in him. Could this be the beginning of something beautiful for Conan, or just another chapter of his life that he would have to run away from?
Content/trigger warning: This story contains themes of bullying, transphobia, homophobia, abuse, and suicidal thoughts, as well as sexual activity.
[[word count: 80,000 - 90,000]]
Cover designed by Jenna Conrad
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"We've been best friends for fourteen years. Did you really think I wouldn't notice? I can see it... in your eyes. Your smile never reaches your eyes." -- When Aspen Ace falls, he falls hard. It's a gradual descent that happens so naturally, Aspen doesn't even recognize anything's changed until he's already neck-deep in an unrequited love for his best friend, Rafe Alvarez. Nervous and insecure, Aspen brings this new revelation to the person he trusts most-his older brother, Alex. He doesn't expect to be met with unconditional acceptance, but the reaction he receives is nightmare fodder. Regret barely scratches the surface of Aspen's emotions when his brother decides to blackmail him, but with no other option, Aspen learns to survive. Aspen can deal with the abuse as long as Alex keeps his sexuality a secret. He'll just wait it out. Aspen will graduate high school with a baseball scholarship and get the hell out of his conservative hometown... if he can endure. But he can't, and Aspen's suddenly fighting not only his brother, but the all-consuming monster in his head.
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