Repetition Compulsion - Janet Chiramba - Wattpad

Repetition Compulsion

Reads 3,317
Votes 659
Parts 51
Time 4h 33m

Reads 3,317
Votes 659
Parts 51
Time 4h 33m

Mature

***[[COMPLETED!!]]***

[[Previously titled "Serendipity"]]

Stranded at a graduate recruitment event after mentally breaking up with her then boyfriend, 20 year old  Sera Seme meets the ever so sexy, charming and hopelessly intriguing Abimbola Blake. 

Shortly after this encounter, Sera's life seemingly starts falling into place: She gets the guy (even if its just for one night) the internship she wants, and is seemingly one step away from making all her dreams come true. But looks can be deceiving, because underneath her seemingly perfect life, Sera is filled with pain and sadness from her past traumas in life. 

Sera thinks she is just postponing having to deal with the  pain and bitterness associated with events from her past, but little does she know that her grief is eating her from the inside out. Little does she know that what she is doing is not living at all, but rather re-enacting the most traumatic events from the past that she absolutely refuses to come to terms with. 

And as she tries to grasp this, and come to terms with it, she realizes that she is not the only one dealing with demons, and that the sooner she realizes the world doesn't revolve around her, the better. 

This book mostly tries to illustrate one of the most confusing psychological phenomena's to date; the "repetition compulsion."  In 'repetition compulsion', a person repeats a traumatic event or its circumstances over and over again. This includes re-enacting the event or putting oneself in situations where the event is likely to happen again.

While no hard-and-fast answers exist, this book tries to offer explanations as to why "just leave" is not an option for some individuals exposed to unstable or traumatic relationships.

Cover Art: Naailah Gattoo or @doodle_j_unkie on Instagram!
Feel free to pop her a DM! She's a real gem to work with!All Rights Reserved

Table of contents

51 parts

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Everyones Obsessed* by Cie1_5

The past carries an unjust history. Immoral actions mark the present. The future holds untold consequences. Bad things happen to good people, and good people do bad things. | | || ||| ||||| |||||||| ||||||||||||| You, of all people, should understand the obsession. Whether it's the endless hours lost to a screen, the compulsion to scroll through forums, the need for that next high, the haunting grip of past trauma, the fixation on someone unattainable, the pursuit of a fleeting feeling, or even the inexplicable attachment to something as simple as frogs-obsession has woven itself into every corner of your life. •__ •_ •• •_• •_• • •••• / ••_ • •_• I have done terrible things because I let obsession take over me. It wasn't always that way. It started as a lie; it became true one day. I told myself I was in control and could stop anytime, but I only lied to myself. I was powerless. I never wanted to hurt anyone; I hurt him and myself. Now, I'm left with the wreckage of my choices. I wonder if there's any way to get things back to how they were before. Xgbs bqf zpv patfttfc xisg? To us, they are just another random person: the letters carved on the table, the artist of old graffiti, the person who also walked into the restroom, the reason the trash is full, or the garbage thrower on the side of the streets. But to them, they're the main fucking character in their own story, and each mark, item, digital trace, and photo they have makes a fragment of their existence. We may never know their face or name, but the traces they left remind us that everyone's lives intersect, creating a vast web of connections; unnoticed or not, they are never truly invisible. Dy32Al43Dy44|Dy11Al99Dy33|Dy44Dy87Dy22|Dy01Dy87|Dy87Al11Dy01Dy33Dy01Dy01Dy33Al21|Dy32Dy55Al01Al43|Dy21Al99Dy11Dy21Dy65Dy55Al77Dy43|Dy21Dy87Al21Dy33Dy01/

The unreachable mountain by Growened

"You're unbearable!" He kicks her with utter contempt. "Please tell me where I'm wrong, causing you discomfort was not my intention," she said crying, causing him to hit her against the ground again. "Do you think you can live with good intentions? Didn't you have all the time you wanted to change and learn? You still dare to ask for more!" He yells at her with hatred, he blamed her for being the one will cause a woman to be beaten; He didn't want to be that kind of man. However, what he lived with her caused him to bring out what he hated the most about himself from within. -Forget it love- said a woman who was next to her- it's not worth it- this dog was supposed to be her friend, she was supposed to support her just like she did; however he managed so that he and she hated each other and thus be able to steal it. The woman on the floor does not know how much she was framed and harmed by her naivety, nor did she know that this was the beginning of her misfortunes. Because of that woman she did not stop suffering, wherever she went she suffered verbal or physical abuse and everything was orchestrated by this woman; she didn't know until she was about to faint. "Why?" She asked this unarmed woman without knowing why she hated him so much. She never did anything to hurt him. She just laughed viciously without answering him, she didn't have to waste her time with an insect; leaving La to die imprisoned in the house where she was kidnapped. "Answer me!" She got up from her bed screaming "Eh? This looks like my room; Did I reincarnate myself in the past?" She ran to the bathroom just to see that her assumption was correct. She thanked the heavens for this second chance by promising that she wouldn't be fooled a second time.

We Never Broke Up (A Second Chance Romance) by Averyaaaaaa

"So... what about us?" he asked, and I looked at him, a bit bewildered. "What?" I inquired. "You and me... what are we, Sera? You know how you affect me. You make me feel like I'm losing my mind, and I feel incomplete when you're not around. I yearn for your touch, your scent, and everything about you drives me wild," he admitted, his words close to my face. I let out a shaky breath as I felt a warmth spread through my body. "Thad, I think you're getting something wrong," I began, but he interrupted me. "No, you're the one refusing to admit that you're feeling the same way I am," he insisted, causing me to fall silent. He was right, I couldn't deny the feelings i had for him. They had always been there, but they had intensified with his return. ●●●●●●□□□●●□□□●●● In their final year of high school, Thaddeus and Sera epitomized the dream teen couple, envied by all. However, a fateful argument altered their course. Thaddeus lost his memory of Sera in a tragic accident that night, and the stringent stance of his mother kept them apart. Heartbroken, Sera reluctantly left her hometown. Fast forward eight years, Sera, now a skilled chef, found herself unexpectedly intersecting with Thaddeus, who had transformed into a bustling CEO of his father's company Whitlick and Co. As they reentered each other's lives, Thaddeus discovered an irresistible pull towards Sera, while she, fearing she'd only bring trouble, attempted to keep a safe distance. What happens when a girl is trying to stay away from a guy due to his obsession with her and for his safety in order for him not to remember her while he keeps chasing her around trying to find out why he can't seem to stay put and calm if he doesn't see her? 🤭🧐 Let's find out!! ~40,000 word count _All images are from Pinterest. Credit to the owners. 30/11/23 --- #1 on Contemporary lit.

Convalescence (MxM) by StxnedWriter

**WARNING** ~contains explicit content that may not be acceptable to all viewers. discretion advised~ con·va·les·cence noun a period of rest; recovery. The anxiety tore through Blake like a kind friend with a gentle reminder. He could never truly Escape. He thought, with Callin dead and his past behind him, he could finally move on. But would that ever be the case? Blake's thoughts were pummeling deeper and deeper into a deeply twisted place in his mind, going back to the days when he lived in the dark and had to scheme to survive. Ammon watched as Blake slowly came undone from the seams. He seemed to enjoy watching Blake fall apart. Why is that? Why does everyone seem to enjoy it when Blake lets go of his sanity? Having to face the reality that his life would likely always be a fight. He would always have to kill. * DISCLAIMER- In this story world, each person gets five potential mates! Blake met two in the first book and one in the second, making three in total. By the end of this book, Blake has met four of the five! * Blake Daniels' story has been one tragedy after another, Complications littering his route, tripping him on his journey through life. At this point, he's entirely disgusted by his Complacency. For as long as he can remember, he has been at the whim of everyone's desires, neglecting his own. This left him wondering: what it is he wants? Could it be the sweet relief of death? Escape? Or simple Convalescence? *** ~Ms.Witch *** FINAL BOOK IN THE ~Escape~ SERIES! Book 1: ~Complications~ Original: Created- 2015, Completed- 2016 Rewrite: Created (October) & Completed (December)- 2023 Book 2: ~Complacency~ Created (January) & Completed (March)- 2024 Book 3: ~Convalescence~ Created (April) & Completed (May)- 2024 Thanks for reading!

Half of My Heart ✔️ by koolkenz

how far would you go . . . for someone you love? ♔ Levi steps forward, placing himself between me and Jack. Like he's protecting me from him. But I don't need protecting, certainly not from Jack. "Who do you think you are, dude?" Levi spits, getting in Jack's face. "Look, Scarlett was just helping me out with a proj-" "I'm not your dude," Jack bites, and I want to tear my hair out of my head. This is going downhill very fast. Jack turns to me. "Scar, we need to talk," he says lowly. Then loud enough for Levi to hear, "So can you please get this kid to leave." "Hey, you don't get to come in here and start ordering her around," Levi says harshly. "You don't control her." "And you think that you do?" Jack spits. ♔ When Scarlett moved off to college, she hoped to start anew and find her way in this world alone. Two problems. One: her older brother goes to the same college, and it seems like he's everywhere, keeping her from doing everything she hoped to do as a college freshman. Two: her brother's devastatingly handsome best friend also seems hell-bent on ruining her college experience . . . but in a different way. Their paths keep crossing, and Scarlett is reminded of the powerful attraction that they've both ignored for far too long. Not to mention, a new face begins to occupy everyday Scarlett's thoughts. When Scarlett is paired with an allusive, darkly handsome stranger for a film project, her world begins to open in ways she never thought possible. But as his mystery unravels into dark secrets, she wonders if she's falling a bit too hard. Before long, Scarlett is forced to realize that balancing the hearts of two boys at once just might result in the breaking of her own.

With Love, Étienne | ✓ by softdreams_x

❝People like you don't get happy endings, not after that.❞ **** Childhood best friends Étienne LeRoy and Louella Rey were once inseparable-two halves of a perfect whole. Where Étienne was steady, Lou was wild, filling every moment with laughter and light. But that was before. Before Lou disappeared. At twenty-two, Louella has become a ghost of her former self, retreating into a world of silence and secrets after deferring her college dreams. She's mastered the art of blending into the background, hiding the pain she carries like a bruise that never fades. When Étienne returns home after a year abroad, he barely recognizes the girl he used to know. Lou's spark is gone, replaced by hollow eyes and a fragile shell of who she used to be. Haunted by the change and unwilling to give up on her, Étienne sets out to uncover the truth behind her withdrawal. But some truths are better left buried. There's something she's not telling him, something dark-something that involves the one person Étienne trusts most in the world. The deeper he digs, the more dangerous the truth becomes, until Étienne is forced to confront a devastating question: How well do you really know the people you love? **There are serious themes discussed in this book. Please do NOT read if you might be triggered. Your mental health comes first before any stupid book.** Part I is complete. Part II is ongoing. START DATE: 25.03.21 END DATE: 25.06.21 WORD COUNT: 70,000 - 80,000

A Chaotic but Perfect World: In the Epping Forest by HeartlessStarGazer

The Epping Forest. Most who go never come back. People who have claimed to escape have seen the kidnappers using magic. Portals, magic balls, werewolves, occultism and curses...Team MBTI is responsible for solving this mystery and saving every survivor. As an evil-hunter in the secret ministry of London's anti-magic organizations, it is Serly's duty to fight all dark forces and black magic, to protect the people, that are clueless of the supernatural, while balancing them with her personal goals. But a seemingly unfortunate even disrupts her balance. That event? Being put in group MBTI against her will. Being put in and out of teams was just her daily exercise. After all, she's a lone wolf, she strives when she's her boss, and does she not want to get thrown out of this group too...she'd do anything to, but what if her heart decides to take a different direction? What if this group speaks her language? Warning: ***Violence ***Gore ***Torture ***Trauma ***Suicide attempts ***Murder ***Depression ***Inexplicit sexual assault ***Semi-explicit sexual scenes ***Profanity --- This is the first book of a series. Second book is "A Chaotic but Perfect World: The Twin Blazes" and the third is "A Chaotic but Perfect World: The Past Unleashed". They aren't written yet, but I've already planned the plot. --- Other than being the first book of a series, this book is also the first book I've written (I'm writing) on Wattpad. Do tell me your thoughts. I will hold sessions of character and plot analysis between parts, stay tuned and join in the discussions. I've been writing this and updating old chapters since 2023...if you care. I, personally, don't.

A Dance Of Crowns & Thrones | Book I by AWriternamed-ANA

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𝑼𝑵𝑯𝑰𝑵𝑮𝑬𝑫 𝑩𝒀 𝑯𝑰𝑴 | 18+|✓ by Zorrowrites

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What does it take to unlock the path of true happiness? For two complete strangers, it's as simple as a wish to escape their sham of a life. But there's a reason you should be careful what you wish for. They'll be put to the ultimate test to determine how far they're willing to go and how hard they're willing to work for the desires of their hearts. ------------------------------------------------------ Zain Lockheart has always been the prime example of "everything that glitters isn't gold". Constantly living as an outcast in the shadow of his parents' fame and riches, he never imagined there'd be more to life than living in a gilded cage. When he meets Saber Blacke at a housewarming, he discovers a kindred spirit in her. She knows all too well what it is to pretend to be content for the sake of image. All it takes is this chance meeting to send them both nosediving into an alternate reality, where a mysterious race of people are suffering the consequences of a rift-inducing war that took place over a century ago. With Saber as his closest companion, Zain quickly transforms from a burden of privilege into the key of salvation for these people and their doomed world. The goal seems simple enough to accomplish: reunite two kingdoms to restore the world to its former glory. But what he isn't counting on is a pair of intruders, watching his every move from the shadows, hellbent on unleashing chaos and destroying this paradise beyond repair forever. Only one thing is certain now: if he ever wants to return home with Saber, they must first survive the harsh trials and unforgiving wilderness of Wonderland.

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The past carries an unjust history. Immoral actions mark the present. The future holds untold consequences. Bad things happen to good people, and good people do bad things. | | || ||| ||||| |||||||| ||||||||||||| You, of all people, should understand the obsession. Whether it's the endless hours lost to a screen, the compulsion to scroll through forums, the need for that next high, the haunting grip of past trauma, the fixation on someone unattainable, the pursuit of a fleeting feeling, or even the inexplicable attachment to something as simple as frogs-obsession has woven itself into every corner of your life. •__ •_ •• •_• •_• • •••• / ••_ • •_• I have done terrible things because I let obsession take over me. It wasn't always that way. It started as a lie; it became true one day. I told myself I was in control and could stop anytime, but I only lied to myself. I was powerless. I never wanted to hurt anyone; I hurt him and myself. Now, I'm left with the wreckage of my choices. I wonder if there's any way to get things back to how they were before. Xgbs bqf zpv patfttfc xisg? To us, they are just another random person: the letters carved on the table, the artist of old graffiti, the person who also walked into the restroom, the reason the trash is full, or the garbage thrower on the side of the streets. But to them, they're the main fucking character in their own story, and each mark, item, digital trace, and photo they have makes a fragment of their existence. We may never know their face or name, but the traces they left remind us that everyone's lives intersect, creating a vast web of connections; unnoticed or not, they are never truly invisible. Dy32Al43Dy44|Dy11Al99Dy33|Dy44Dy87Dy22|Dy01Dy87|Dy87Al11Dy01Dy33Dy01Dy01Dy33Al21|Dy32Dy55Al01Al43|Dy21Al99Dy11Dy21Dy65Dy55Al77Dy43|Dy21Dy87Al21Dy33Dy01/