Repetition Compulsion
- Reads 3,416
- Votes 659
- Parts 51
MatureComplete Sun, Sep 5, 20214h 33m
***[[COMPLETED!!]]***
[[Previously titled "Serendipity"]]
Stranded at a graduate recruitment event after mentally breaking up with her then boyfriend, 20 year old Sera Seme meets the ever so sexy, charming and hopelessly intriguing Abimbola Blake.
Shortly after this encounter, Sera's life seemingly starts falling into place: She gets the guy (even if its just for one night) the internship she wants, and is seemingly one step away from making all her dreams come true. But looks can be deceiving, because underneath her seemingly perfect life, Sera is filled with pain and sadness from her past traumas in life.
Sera thinks she is just postponing having to deal with the pain and bitterness associated with events from her past, but little does she know that her grief is eating her from the inside out. Little does she know that what she is doing is not living at all, but rather re-enacting the most traumatic events from the past that she absolutely refuses to come to terms with.
And as she tries to grasp this, and come to terms with it, she realizes that she is not the only one dealing with demons, and that the sooner she realizes the world doesn't revolve around her, the better.
This book mostly tries to illustrate one of the most confusing psychological phenomena's to date; the "repetition compulsion." In 'repetition compulsion', a person repeats a traumatic event or its circumstances over and over again. This includes re-enacting the event or putting oneself in situations where the event is likely to happen again.
While no hard-and-fast answers exist, this book tries to offer explanations as to why "just leave" is not an option for some individuals exposed to unstable or traumatic relationships.
Cover Art: Naailah Gattoo or @doodle_j_unkie on Instagram!
Feel free to pop her a DM! She's a real gem to work with!
All Rights Reserved
Join the largest storytelling communityGet personalized story recommendations, save your favourites to your library, and comment and vote to grow your community.
You may also like
Female Stalker - A Brooklyn Love Story
Lola, a 30-year-old woman, finds herself stalking her boyfriend after a breakup, a position she could never imagine herself to get into, especially at this age. The book starts at a point when Lola has parked her car by her b/f's gym, waits in the car, hoping to see him when he exits the building. She knows what she doing is wrong, and she shouldn't do that, but she is not in control of her emotions, and it is quite the opposite. She feels she needs to see him and to talk to him. And while she waits, all kinds of thoughts are going through her head: "I have a feeling he is seeing someone. I don't want to think about what I'm gonna do to him!" and shortly after: "Maybe I should just leave before he sees me? No! I can't. When you are rolling off a cliff you just can't stop. I guess you need to feel the bottom. The only problem - you don't know where that bottom is." And she is trying to analyze how is it that she got attached to him so quickly and so strongly: "What has he done to me? Is it some kind of a spell? How could I get so attached to him so soon? Is this how true love is supposed to feel? Losing yourself in someone, completely? Or is that just the stupid me?" At this point, the reader may get the impression that Lola is the type of girl that rarely gets the attention of attractive men, and this is why she behaves like that. To their surprise, it turns out that this is not the case. Lola is a tall and astonishingly beautiful woman. She is fun and sarcastic. Men are flocking around her trying to get her attention. And of course, she is not flawless, just like anybody else. And the man she is stalking is just an average guy.. But we don't want to spoil you the whole story. This is a love story has passion and sex in it, as well as fights and misunderstandings. And the main question remains: will Lola succeed in getting him back, or her attempts will only backfire? Read the whole story and find out.Complete
A Whole Different Life (Book I)
"What would you rather? Floating in eternal darkness or...serving me? As my champion?" "Honestly? Neither, why in the world would I choose to be a servant in my next life?!" "Hm, then I suppose-" "Wait, I wasn't finished." She let out a sigh, trepidation heavy in my mind. She's spent her entire life in a world that was 50/50 for her...school was rough but she had companions. Her home life was great but it had its ups and downs. She was beautiful! But...she didn't feel that way. Perhaps another life could give her that? A sense of renewal, a chance to be someone better and greater than the person she originally was. "But! I'll take the latter, I could use a change. A chance to be a different me is always appreciated. After all, it's not like I'm going to be a world-renowned hero right?" ___________ What happens when you die? Do you go to a religious after-life? Do you simply float in black nothingness or do you wake up in the body of another person? Well...for 17-year old Eos Theodoric, a girl who died in a tragic car accident, she knows the answer. Waking up in the body of an animal in service to an Animal Guardian who lives in a different world known as Balerion! Get ready for this one, a fantasy life isn't what it seems! Warning(s): This book may contain descriptions of torture of a slightly graphic nature, sexual innuendos, mentions of rape in a chapter and possibly some graphic death scenes!Complete
"But I Want You,"
He thought he loved her. But in his world, love meant waiting. Watching. Wanting. Mudassir has always been haunted-by his father's control, by years of silence, and by the memory of a girl from university who never knew him more than just an acquaintance. Post-graduation, still trapped in emotional ruin, he finds her again... but not the way he hoped. She's changed. She's moved on. She's engaged. But not him. To him, if it runs-it means chase. As obsession festers, therapy rooms turn into battlegrounds. Kindness is mistaken for invitation. And the line between affection and control begins to disappear. When the past claws its way back into the present, what can truly be salvaged-and what was never real to begin with? This isn't a typical love story, but a descent of obsession, projection, and the danger of trying to fit someone into the shape of your wounds. He didn't just fall in love with her. He built a life around wanting her. ... In the book cover, that's me lol and is made and photographed by me. ... ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This story contains depictions of mental illness (depression, anxiety, OCD, narcissistic traits), suicidal ideation, emotional abuse, death threats, substance use, and toxic family dynamics. Reader discretion is strongly advised. If you're struggling, know that help exists, and you are not alone. ❤️Complete
Vicious Fangs (Mystic Bonds #1) | COMPLETED
❝ Let's find you a new home, shall we? ❞ •○• A cold Shifter General. A bloodthirsty Vampire Prince. A powerful Fae King. A mysterious protective werewolf Alpha. And a human girl. The question was - why were the strings of fate bringing them together? •○• 18 year old, sharp and vigilant Cara Arnel was one step away from slavery freedom and being sold. And being caught by the Shifter General of the Vampire Army was most certainly not a part of that plan. Nor was becoming a scullery maid or an assaulted slave in the Royal Palace instead of a blood bag or sex slave. But that was when things started to change. Tensions became high and fights broke out in the unstable supernatural world with the return of Lucifer's son: Killian after more than four centuries. Her visions started again. And a bit too many supernatural males were willing to protect her for no reason whatsoever. Turns out, Cara might not be as insignificant as she thought. Yet, she was undoubtedly human. And it seemed, she wasn't as well informed of her past as she thought. If her memories were the ones to be relied upon. At least.......the ones she had of this life. •○• Shortlisted for Wattpad India Awards 2021 (Please don't copy the story line. It's all mine. A figment of my imagination. Read it, surely vote and comment! Thank you for taking out your time to read it! Slowly being Edited!) BOOK 1 in the Mystic Bonds (NEEDD HEAVY EDITING!) Happy Ending....eventually. Like, by the last book? Hehe. #1 in Fae on 23/10/20 #1 in queen on 23/11/21 #1 in Escape on 9/6/21 #1 in Angels on 13/6/21 #1 in Human on 11/8/21 #2 in Demons on 2/5/21 #2 in reverseharem on 29/8/21 #32 in New on 28/6/21 #61 in Paranormal on 23/12/20 #78 in Suspense on 26/11/21 #1 in supernatural on 29/9/22 #87 in werewolf on 23/8/21Complete
Mending Heart |18+|
When a downcast, introverted, and unmotivated twenty-eight-year-old hooks up with a stranger at a bar, the last thing she expected was to see him at work the next day. What happens when the girl who's sworn off relationships, falls in love with the one man who isn't afraid to break apart the walls she's built? ............ McKenzie Anderson is still trying to piece her life back together after separating from her husband, but she's dug herself into a slump she can't quite get herself out of. Add in an infuriating and devilishly handsome new boss to the mix, things are bound to get a whole lot more interesting in her life. Ethan Thomas is a straight shooter who knows what he wants, and isn't afraid to show it. He's got his eyes set on the feisty blonde, and he's made it his mission to show her love isn't hopeless. From their first wild night together, both Ethan and McKenzie felt the intense and undeniable attraction between them. The closer these two get and the more vulnerable they become, they have to wonder if there's more to their encounters than steamy passion. One thing's for sure, and that's that sparks will fly and hearts will be mended. ~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\ "What is it you want, McKenzie?" He demands, his lips on my neck nibbling and kissing their way up to my earlobe. His hand trails down my skin until it finally reaches the lace material separating my pussy from his fingers. Still staring intently into my eyes, he slowly moves the lace material aside and dips into my hot and ready core. I bit down on my lip, attempting to suppress my moans. This only motivates him to push deeper. His fingers begin to move rhythmically inside of me, pushing me over the edge. "I want you!" I finally release, fully giving into him. WARNING: THIS BOOK CONTAINS MATURE CONTENT |18+| |WATTPAD FEATURED| #1 in Sexy #1 in Flirty #1 in Divorce #1 in EroticaStoriesComplete
Wronged
E-BOOK AND PAPERBACK AVAILABLE ON AMAZON NOW!! - - - MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY - - - When you're born, you are born with an engraving tattooed upon your skin. It is given to you, to determine what man or woman should be your lover. Who should be with you forever once you find them. If you find them. It's a mark that is only half-finished, the other half left on your soulmate's body. Heat emerges on the area of your mark when they're near, and cold grows the farther you are apart. For Anna Cardale, her shoulder is covered in what looks to be half of a wing. A beautiful red and delicate wing. She's quiet, stoic, and doesn't let anyone in. And she certainly doesn't care for a "soulmate" ever since escaping a terrifying past life. But when she moves to a new town and to a new school with a new care home family, her skin heats up. She feels her stomach churn in unnerved expression. It's as if something is yearning to pull her closer. And then she sees him. For it wasn't something that pulled her in. It was someone. And just like her, demons are living deep inside of his soul. Dreaded demons that keep him company. Can she heal him? Or is the other way around? Or perhaps the demons are always the ones who prevail... - - - "I'm sad that this wonderful book is coming to an end. 😢" - LlexieD "This book was phenomenal! I'm in such wow of it." - singingchoirfreak "AHH IM CRYING THIS IS AMAZING 1000/10 YES BITCHH" - BeautyInTheBlackRose - - -Complete
THE GREAT ESCAPE
#Wattys2014 THE TITLE IS SHORTENED. Some people have the strong desire to escape their life, loneliness, and sometimes it's themselves. Their own demons that haunt them every waking moment of their lives. You have to fight those demons and show them that I don't fear you anymore. *WARNING* story does contain adult content. *Parts of this book are based off of real people and real events* (If you want to know more info on any character, use the 'THE GREAT ESCAPE WIKIA', or just pm me I will try to get back to a.s.a.p. !) The book cover no longer has anything to do with the story I just want to keep what I had from the beginning to endComplete
Complications (MxM)
**WARNING** ~contains explicit content that may not be acceptable to all viewers. discretion advised~ "No no no no..." My words trailed "NO!!" I screamed, pulling harshly at all my restraints, attempting to get free, hearing the harsh clank of metal on metal with every movement. Colder than the table beneath me, chills ran through my body. This couldn't be happening, please. A sadistic laugh rang through the room and my head fell in defeat as my eyes squinted closed, not wanting to see his face. "Yes, actually." I felt his disgusting, filthy hands trail down my arms. I could feel him leaning forwards, moving himself closer to me. I couldn't bring myself to open my eyes, so I just lay there, waiting for what I knew was to come. "You're mine now, mut." His voice made my body tense more than it already had. The way he sounded so angry. So possessive. I dared myself to speak, "W-what ar-are you gonna d-do to me?" My voice shook and wavered so much in my fear that it was numb to my ears. Alpha Dave let out a low, calloused chuckle that sent chills throughout my body. He said, in a deadly low voice, "I'm going to remind you who you belong to." * DISCLAIMER- In this story world, each person gets five potential mates! * Blake Daniels' story has been one tragedy after another, Complications littering his route, tripping him on his journey through life. At this point, he's entirely disgusted by his Complacency. For as long as he can remember, he has been at the whim of everyone's desires, neglecting his own. This left him wondering: what it is he wants? Could it be the sweet relief of death? Escape? Or simple Convalescence? *** ~Ms.Witch *** BOOK ONE IN THE ~Escape~ SERIES! Book 1: ~Complications~ Original Created- 2015, Completed- 2016 Rewrite Created (October) & Completed (December)- 2023 Book 2: ~Complacency~ Created (January) & Completed (March)- 2024 Book 3: ~Convalescence~ Created (April) & Completed (May)- 2024 Thanks for reading!Complete
Secret Mind ✓
"She's right! She's right! I don't cut in the right spot." My hold tightens on my wrist. The red blood oozes out of my wrist. I slide up and grab my bag and run out of the bathroom. I don't care if people can see the blood I just want to get out. I race for the doors and shove through people. I earn a lot of glares and glances that read "weirdo." I ignore and push. I run to my house and lock myself in my bathroom. I don't bother closing the front door cause I don't care if people come in to kill me. I grab my razor and cut deep cuts into my arm and wrists falling into a pool of my own blood. • • • Evangeline has a great life. Friends? Check! Good grades? Check! Loving family? Check! But what if she has secrets that nobody knows of? What if the only thing she can trust is her secret diary? What if slowly but surly she's dying inside? How can an innocent twelve year old deal with these problems? Will she keep on facing these problem till the day she breaks. Her school burns down forcing her into a different school to meet different people and she has to fit into a different lifestyle as well. Meet Evangeline. Now at 17 years of age in a new high school. Not all girls anymore. No uniform. Meet Drake. Your classic bad-boy. He just moved to Saint Abigail high school. He is assigned partners with the quiet, calm, unnoticed Evangeline. As time progresses he finds that she isn't as happy on the inside as she is on the outside. Can he save her? Or is it too late? • • • Some rude language. Depression and cutting. Don't say I didn't warn you. Okay, I wrote this at the start of this year (may 2016) and I had very poor writing skills. This book hasn't been edited and the whole idea is cliche so I wouldn't recommend you read it but I'm not stopping you, either. Read at your own risk. • • • Copyright © 2017 by -moonlust. All rights reserved.Complete
Dark Romance
18+ !!! This is a dark story with multiple explicit scenes. So, please take this age restriction serious. Gang AU -------------------------------------------------------- Y/n owns a little bakery and works hard to keep her dream alive. She's happy with her job, with her friends, and with her relationship. For the most part anyway. The secrecy and possessiveness of her girlfriend causes friction every now and then. Until it eventually ends in a breakup, which in return leads to Y/n meeting another woman at the bar. If only she knew, how much and in which way her ex-girlfriend is connected to her new crush... Some secrets are better left untouched. -------------------------------------------------------- This story shows toxic relationships and behaviors. Those are not romanticized and in real life, all of this would have a different impact. Please be aware, that this is fictional and not a depiction of what a healthy relationship should look like. TW will likely be given in the specific chapter as well, but here are a few, you should be aware of: - explicit sexual scenes (consensual) - toxic and slightly abusive relationship - manipulation - obsessive behavior - weapons - blood, gore - violence - stalking - injuries Since I feel like no one will read until here, or the description in general: Hi, it's me, the author. Thanks for reading all of this and let me know in the comments if you did, so I can reply and express my happiness about it :DComplete
Lola, a 30-year-old woman, finds herself stalking her boyfriend after a breakup, a position she could never imagine herself to get into, especially at this age. The book starts at a point when Lola has parked her car by her b/f's gym, waits in the car, hoping to see him when he exits the building. She knows what she doing is wrong, and she shouldn't do that, but she is not in control of her emotions, and it is quite the opposite. She feels she needs to see him and to talk to him. And while she waits, all kinds of thoughts are going through her head: "I have a feeling he is seeing someone. I don't want to think about what I'm gonna do to him!" and shortly after: "Maybe I should just leave before he sees me? No! I can't. When you are rolling off a cliff you just can't stop. I guess you need to feel the bottom. The only problem - you don't know where that bottom is." And she is trying to analyze how is it that she got attached to him so quickly and so strongly: "What has he done to me? Is it some kind of a spell? How could I get so attached to him so soon? Is this how true love is supposed to feel? Losing yourself in someone, completely? Or is that just the stupid me?" At this point, the reader may get the impression that Lola is the type of girl that rarely gets the attention of attractive men, and this is why she behaves like that. To their surprise, it turns out that this is not the case. Lola is a tall and astonishingly beautiful woman. She is fun and sarcastic. Men are flocking around her trying to get her attention. And of course, she is not flawless, just like anybody else. And the man she is stalking is just an average guy.. But we don't want to spoil you the whole story. This is a love story has passion and sex in it, as well as fights and misunderstandings. And the main question remains: will Lola succeed in getting him back, or her attempts will only backfire? Read the whole story and find out.
More detailsContent Guidelines