Lessons to Lear

Lessons to Lear

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Sat, Jul 29, 2017
Think of something you 'really want to do or have'. Then think of all the 'things you don't want and don't have'. Than think of the 'things you have'. Then make them into three lists, look it over to see which ones longer and shorter then the others. For a lot of people the 'things you really want to do or have' are a lot longer then the things you have or shorter then the 'things you don't want and don't have'. Usually the things you 'really want to do or have' is longer then the list of things you have or less then. For me the list for all of them are the same. They equal to nothing, I have been blocking out so many things that are pain that I don't care for possessions like most people. But oh well I don't care so it don't matter, so here is my pathetic excuse for a story. Or well better know my life.
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"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboard

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