the space between
  • Reads 117,090
  • Votes 2,463
  • Parts 25
  • Time 6h 19m
  • Reads 117,090
  • Votes 2,463
  • Parts 25
  • Time 6h 19m
Ongoing, First published Jul 22, 2020
Her eyes search mine, and I can see the conflict in them, the way she's trying to find the right thing to say. She doesn't answer right away, but I force myself to hold her gaze.

Finally, she exhales, leaning back against the seat. "I don't know what I want," she says, her voice trembling. "But I don't want to lose you. I just... I'm trying to figure it all out." Her hands drop from the wheel, landing in her lap like she's run out of strength.

The words hit me harder than I expect, and for a moment, I can't speak. I look away, my chest tight. "Well, I know what I want," I say, the words tumbling out before I can stop them. My voice is soft, almost shaking. "I want you, Analia."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Analia has a boyfriend. A good one. The kind that makes sense, that fits neatly into the life she's spent years building. Safe. Easy. The right choice.

Lexie is none of those things.

She's messy and reckless, always running toward something or running away. She smokes too much, doesn't apologize for the way she takes up space, and makes Analia feel like her whole life is one wrong move away from falling apart.

The kiss was a mistake. Analia knows that. She tells herself it didn't mean anything, that she can bury it, move on, pretend like it never happened.

But it did happen. And it keeps happening-in glances that last too long, in texts she shouldn't be sending, in the way Lexie's name sits too heavy in her chest.

It's not supposed to be like this. She's not supposed to want her.

But she does. And the more she tries to push it down, the more it spills into everything. Analia tells herself walking away from her is the only option, but it never feels like one. Not when Lexie looks at her like that. Not when her heart keeps betraying her.

And suddenly, she's stuck between wanting her and walking away, unable to do either.
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