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WpMetadataReadMatureOngoing24m
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Mon, Aug 17, 2020
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Fanfic
1Direction
"My dad- here look," He took a deep breath and pulled up his shirt showing off a number of bruises and fading scars. "He hits me Harry. He hurts me. He doesn't like the real me so he made me make a deal with him. If I act the way he wants his perfect son to act, then he wouldn't hit me. Obviously he lied, but it will be much worse if I let my guard down. He's an alcoholic and so when he drinks he really, really drinks and he gets violent and I can't do anything. I can make him happy when he's sober, but that's the best I can do. I'm really trying. and I hate that I have to hurt people in order to live a normal life." We just sit in silence while I try to find the right words.
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"Nothing makes you hurt like hurting who you love" Love shouldn't hurt, loving somebody with everything you have shouldn't make you feel like you're dying. Louis feels like he's drowning. He should have known where this was going from the start, he should have been prepared. Now he's waking up in an empty bed, some days he doesn't want to even wake up again. There's a hole in his heart; it's in the shape of Harry. Nothing he does can fill it. Drugs, alcohol, pouring out his heart into songs that Harry probably won't ever hear. When Louis is with him, he feels like he's in heaven. Being alone, that's what he feels he deserves, at least Harry can be happier without him. Maybe if they met at a different time, under different circumstances, he could have saved them. Louis had to do what was best for Harry, but it kills him a little everyday. Louis sees his smile everyday, but he knows it's no longer for him. Someone else makes Harry happier, but Louis wanted it to be him. They could have had forever. Louis would have given Harry everything. "Forget what I said, it's not what I meant" Harry had tried to say, but Louis knew that wasn't the truth. After everything they've been through, Louis still loves him.

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