"My Thoughts Are Stars No One Can Fathom Into Constellations." - Beccy Boo - Wattpad

Story cover for "My Thoughts Are Stars No One Can Fathom Into Constellations." by JustThatGirlxo

"My Thoughts Are Stars No One Can Fathom Into Constellations."

Reads 36
Votes 2
Parts 3
Time 9m

Reads 36
Votes 2
Parts 3
Time 9m

dark depression secrets selfharm thoughts

To be blatant, this is no ordinary "love" story, or "teen" story, or "fanfiction". In fact, this isn't even a story. 

Here, shall be my contemporary release, until I find the longing to go back to my - although destructive - previous "release".
This isn't going to be happiness, and rainbows, and butterflies. Maybe a slight 2% of it. 
This place, in which you're intrigued to know more, is where my true essence really comes to life. Where you'll know all about me - my troubles, my doubts, my problems. You'll be transported to the depths of my mind. To some, it may seem like nonsensical ramble, but to few, it is so utterly and completely relatable, they'll find themselves hooked, unable to let go. 

I can't promise this will be updated regularly, but I can promise the contents of this are of the truest nature. 

With that been said, I bid you a goodbye, until next time - or not. 
~ JustThatGirlxoAll Rights Reserved

dark depression secrets selfharm thoughts

Table of contents

3 parts

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Broken mind (Under heavy editing!) by wonderland_smile

I'm lost. Broken. And nobody knows. I help people, and when you help people, you don't get help. I couldn't look at myself think how a mess I was. It was too late for me to be fixed. Nobody could help me. I was too deep in it for being saved. I had too many scars and thought. I already had a broken mind. When I tried to kill myself and failed at it, they brought me to a mental facility. There I meet other teens with different stories and each with their problems. The longer I'm here, the more stories I get the knowledge. We come together to tell our stories so that we can move on from what hurt us in the past and what waits for us in the future. We're all strangers, but we're all living in this messed-up place call life. So can we overcome our broken minds. -2014-

FINDING MY KING - P1 SCREENPLAY by Dcoleman80

SCREENPLAY VERSION.... 18+ readers only ❤️ I've lived the last eight years of my life in pain. Pain that should've brought me to my knees, with a big fat "Screw-you world, I'm outta here!" Still, I refused to give up. Never did I want to be that weak, pitiful woman I was with him. Our relationship, (If you can even call it that) became toxic. I knew it was, but I didn't see this one coming. No, that's a lie. It was totally his style. It didn't surprise me at all. I lost so much confidence because of him, so finding love was a complete no no. I just couldn't allow anybody else in after living with the devil himself. It's impossible. I've lost the ability to trust anybody, aside from my family and my best friend. But never did I imagine my life going this way, and because of it, I lost all hope of ever finding love again. Living with all that destruction almost destroyed me. I knew he was bad, but never did I think he would ruin my life. He knew how important my dreams were, and still, he destroyed everything. Crazily, I knew it was his jealousy that made him do it. I've never in my life met anybody so green-eyed before. It was all about control, and I had enough. Since then, it's taken a long time in getting my life back on track. Yet just when I thought it was clear to move forward, I'm hit with more drama. Can I survive it, or will the devil himself come back and destroy my happiness forever?

Evolution by andshesmiles

There are a lot of things you don't really think about until they happen to you. Take rape, for instance. I always thought, "That won't happen to me. I have a boyfriend. I trust him. He would never take advantage of me like that..." I couldn't have been more wrong. Love in this day and age is often confused for manipulation and abuse. The warning signs are here. The things we say will tell us everything that is wrong. You are worth more than what you think you are. It's not your fault. If they tell you otherwise, get out. Burn the bridge. Always remember someone is waiting for you to walk into their life. Someone needs you. Someone loves you. Getting away from all of the wrong people and finding the right ones could save you. I can promise you right now that it saved me. These are the journal entries and selected poems from my first experience of love that left a unpleasant taste in my mouth- quite literally. I am putting this out for the whole world to see because I hope everyone will learn from my experience. People can see. We have no excuses to continue living our lives in ignorance. ...WARNING... HARMFUL THEMES INCLUDING MENTION OF SUICIDE, SELF HARM, AND RAPE. THIS HAS EXPLICIT CONTENT. RECOVERY AND AWARENESS IS THE PURPOSE OF SHARING. DO NOT READ IF THESE THEMES ARE OFFENSIVE OR HARMFUL TO YOU.

Honey's Biker (Devil's Angels MC #2) by photosofrose

*COMPLETED* Description : Honey is just shy of her 21st birthday when she moves to a tiny little town deep in New Mexico. She has no money, no family, no friends and no idea how she ended here, but she does have one thing, and that's a biker named Rage. Rage who is one of the ruthless members of the MC at 26 but unlike Honey, he has money, family, friends and now he'll have one more thing, and that's a cute little waiter named Honey. So when the two meet, and the day after Honey gets assaulted by a drunk in the bar the MC owns, will Rage take her in or will he let her be? Of course he does, buy little does he know the cute little waiter with the british accent will be harder to claim then anyone before. So, We hope you're enjoying you stay here at the Devil's Angels MC. How about you stick around a little longer? For Honey's sake. *Can be ready as a stand alone but is the second book in the Devil's Angels MC.* Excerpt : "Before I get far, my arm is grabbed and I'm yanked back into a hard chest and then shoved into the shed wall, "who the fuck do you think you are?" He growls lowly and slowly in my ear causing me to shiver. Then he looks over his shoulder, "everyone go inside." Everyone nods and drops what their doing and run inside. Then he looks back to me and growls again and runs his hand across my neck before pressing down slightly and leaning in closer to me,"I know you aren't ready for this, I understand that. I told you I'm going to wait for you and still even then you are mine. And I'll do everything in my power to protect you and that also means me claiming you," he pauses and gives my neck butterfly kisses making me let out a moan and nod, "the men here are mean, rough and ruthless and will do anything to get a girl they want. Once you are claimed, you're safer. No one will mess with you, especially because you're mine," he growls again, sucking on my neck. "Ookay," I say breathless."

The Mad House Is Where I Belong by felicityderos

I like inflicting pain. Not on others but on myself. Some people would call me depressed but I'm not. If anything the pain makes me happy. I started "self harming" at the mere age of nine. Or at least, that's what she called it. My therapist, I mean. She ended up giving me a life time supply of antidepressants and some shitty advice. I'm now eighteen, rotting in jail, and awaiting my death sentence. This is my story and if I'm quite honest, you don't want to hear it. +++ awards: ➵ Winner, Short Story Category, "Summer Book Awards" @Capybara100 ➵ Overall Winner, "Summer Book Awards" @Capybara100 status: ➵ started - 19/08/17 ➵ finished- 07/11/18 note: ➵ Please don't copy me. I don't appreciate it and will block you and report you. No writer likes to be copied and neither do readers. Readers want something which is unique and original.

You don't know me by You_Dont_Know_Me9374

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ Not for the faint of heart, I explore dark parts of my mind and unfurl them for your own enjoyment. All of these stories are true. You don't know me, and you're never going to. This is basically just a shitty diary of my life with very few details as to who I am, Don't want to scare you off. Feel free to read but I don't really care. I'm just a screwed up guy that everyone knows and nobody cares about really. If you can't tell I'll probably swear quite a bit in this so if you don't like that I'm sorry, but this really isn't a good read anyway it's just me complaining about the fact I still exist. Actually no, whilst I did start this to complain about my life, the stories are fluctuating, as I discover I am infact worthy of love, even I don't believe it at all times. I hope you enjoy my rantings. ⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️

Jesse's Girl (COMPLETE) by xHeatLifex

They had both been dealt enough tragedy in their short teenaged lives, more than anyone should ever have to endure. Will two self destructive teens coming together do more harm than good? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I don't know what came over me. The poor guy just asked if he could help and I went all 'crazy psycho bitch' on his ass. I couldn't breath. I needed water. I needed air. Fuck why was is it so hot in here. Was it the fact that the moment his hand left my skin I felt an unbearable need to feel his touch again or was it hearing him ask if I needed help that made me feel helpless and broken once again. I didn't know what it was but I felt like I was suffocating, like the jersey I was wearing was strangling every ounce of oxygen from body. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ * This story had been reviewed recently. There are now added scenes and further edits - 2024 *

The Suicide Equation by William007w

For the last month I've had nothing but dark thoughts. I finally decided to speak to someone about it. I went to Mr.Harn and told him everything. All he did was hold me and bring me to the schools councilor. He told her the story I was able to utter. She called my mother and arranged for me to be put into therapy. I spoke with her for half an hour. "You've been through way to much for a girl your age!" She said in astonishment. "I know." I replied. "How are you alive?" She asked with both worry and curiosity. "I honestly don't know." I spoke the truth. How am I still alive?

In Love With Blindfolds On by cjacks1124

I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypnotized my thoughts and paralyzed my thinking. I learned the hard way that love isn't leaning in for a kiss, and a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a punching bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. I tried to be there for my lover, but I learned it is impossible to fix the broken pieces when the glass has shattered. There will always be pieces that are not repairable. However, I kept going right back to the person who I needed to walk away from. I was afraid, and I wasn't brave enough to wake up from this nightmare! I made the choice to suffer when life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. Will I find the courage to know my worth and know that I deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in my ears? Will I have the strength to fight my insecurities? Will, I set myself free, or will I let my love be the death of me?

Therapy by MimiUnnie

"How would you describe your old self?" She asks "I-I was a butterfly, but he beat me down, snapped my wings and forced me to crawl. I was turned into a pest; I was disgusting, dirty. He would step on me, and laughed when I slowly tried to revive myself. He destroyed me; the last strand I had hanging onto the thread." I run my fingers through my hair, "I was mindless, I was a walking corpse with no mind, a marionette. Constantly being tugged at, but I no longer cared. I was a still doll; he was my puppet master.” I stare at her," Do you know what it feels like to be enslaved to someone you thought would be there for you? To be kicked around as if you weren't human; to be tortured to the point where you had to get surgery, to be disrespected on so many levels, to be hurt when you didn't want to, to almost be killed, to lose friends because they couldn't help you, to become a wander-less soul.” --- Ciel has been through hell and back in her past life, but when her confession session goes too far about her abusive relationship with a man, will it be too much for her therapist to take? Find out what happens in the story Therapy...

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Slide 1 of 10

Broken mind (Under heavy editing!) cover

FINDING MY KING - P1 SCREENPLAY cover

Evolution cover

Honey's Biker (Devil's Angels MC #2) cover

The Mad House Is Where I Belong cover

You don't know me cover

Jesse's Girl (COMPLETE) cover

The Suicide Equation cover

In Love With Blindfolds On cover

Broken mind (Under heavy editing!)

I'm lost. Broken. And nobody knows. I help people, and when you help people, you don't get help. I couldn't look at myself think how a mess I was. It was too late for me to be fixed. Nobody could help me. I was too deep in it for being saved. I had too many scars and thought. I already had a broken mind. When I tried to kill myself and failed at it, they brought me to a mental facility. There I meet other teens with different stories and each with their problems. The longer I'm here, the more stories I get the knowledge. We come together to tell our stories so that we can move on from what hurt us in the past and what waits for us in the future. We're all strangers, but we're all living in this messed-up place call life. So can we overcome our broken minds. -2014-