I will never be like you

This is a poem about me being jealous of my little sister. When I was in high school, sure I worked hard, but I only thought of myself. I could never foresee my sister becoming better at literally everything: she is becoming salutatorian, she qualified for Nationals in Speech and Debate, became co-captain of her soccer team, and basically made friends with everyone. When I was in HS, I graduated third in the class (I know that's still amazing, but I can't help but wish I was salutatorian), never even got to States in Speech and Debate, never went past JV in tennis, and didn't have a lot of friends. I am well aware that envy stems from low self-esteem, and whether or not I feel jealousy or let it get to me is up to me. I also know that I should be happy for my little sister. But sometimes I can't help but think about these things and feel awful, and so this is my way of letting it out emotionally.