The Coffee Table & Soulmate .

Why do you buy takeaway coffee? You can make it at home for a lot less money." I raised my eyebrows at the question and took a sip of the offending person who bought latte. The answer that I gave was "Because I want to, and I get to choose what I spend my money on." But there's more to it than that, and I realised it only now I was being asked.

As a single mum, I don't get a lot of opportunity to be "cared for" by other people. I don't have help with running my home, I don't have someone to bring me small tokens that make life more enjoyable. Coffee, flowers, a bar of chocolate...

But I can go to the drive through and have someone ask me how I am and what I want. And that might be the only time that day those questions are asked to me.

I don't think this is unique to being a single parent, either. I think many people will resonate with the loneliness of the modern world. In fact, my love of shop bought coffee started during the grief when I lost my husband when I was still shocked at how lonely I was .After being up several times in the night to realise the absence also to understand how will I earn and be self sufficient, I would just drive my scooty to the coffee shop just so I could have some adult conversation and be surrounded by other grownups for half an hour.

And now - today? That cup of coffee represents a small but rare moment of choice, self-care, and in a way, care from someone else that my life often lacks.

Is this "sad"? Maybe. But it works for me, for now. And if you resonate with this, I want to encourage you to embrace it. It's ok - a coffee is small price to pay for a mental health boost.