Story cover for Escape by MaiseConyelo
Escape
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    Reads 61
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    Votes 29
  • WpPart
    Parts 10
  • WpHistory
    Time 21m
  • WpView
    Reads 61
  • WpVote
    Votes 29
  • WpPart
    Parts 10
  • WpHistory
    Time 21m
Ongoing, First published Oct 31, 2020
Ako si Thalia Andres, 19 years old, isang babaeng simple lang ang pangarap at ito ay maging makamit na ang kaligayahan na aking hinahangad.

Hiwalay na ang mga magulang ko at umaki kaming sina lola at lolo ang nag aalaga sa amin. Nakakalungkot lang dahil sa tuwing kailangan namin ng magulang na aattend sa meeting sa school ay hindi ang mga magulang namin ang umaattend kundi ang mga tita ko at minsan pa nga ay sa nanay ng kaibigan ko nalang ako nagpapasuyo.

Naiinggit ako sa tuwing may makikita akong isang pamilya na masaya, iniisip ko kung ano kayang pakiramdam ng may masayang pamilya? Yung may magulang na aalagaan ka sa tuwing may sakit ka, ano kayang mangyayari kung hindi nagkahiwalay si mama't papa at naging mas maayos sila? Ayan ang mga katanungan sa isipan ko na alam kong hindi na mangyayari dahil alam kong mahirap na.

Sa tuwing malungkot ako ay lagi kong sinusuot ang aking earphone at dahil may kagandahan ang aking boses ko ay sinasabayan ko ang mga musika na lumalabas dito. Laking pasasalamat ko sa earphone na ito dahil sa bawat araw na may kakaiba akong nararamdaman ay narito siya, handa akong damayan. Feeling ko sa tuwing suot ko ito ay nakakatakas ako sa mga problema ko dahil inaalis nito ang mga boses na naririnig ko sa paligid ko at pinapalitan ito ng magagandang musika pang pagaan ng nararamdaman ko.

Hindi ako mahilig mag sabi ng mga problema ko sa iba at hilig ko itong kimkimin dahil sanay na ako, iniisip kong wala naman silang magagawa kung sasabihin ko pa ito sa kanila at dadagdag lang ako sa problema nila. Kahit down na down na ako ay pilit parin akong ngumingiti kahit gustong gusto kona tumakas sa mundong ito, sa magulong mundo na ito. Isa akong overthinker at gustong-gusto kong gawin to.p Ang tanging hiling ko lang naman ay maging masaya pero bakit parang pinagkakait parin ito sakin? Ganun ba talaga yon, sasaya ka lang saglit pero maya-maya malungkot kana kaagad? Sana lagi nalang ako masaya at hindi na mapalitan ng lungkot.
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Umpisa pa lang alam ko sa sarili ko na hindi mo naman susuklian ang pagmamahal na nararamdaman ko para sa'yo. Una pa lang alam ko ng kapatid lang ang tingin mo sa akin habang sa kaniya tingin mo ay magiging asawa at maging nanay ng mga anak mo. Alam ko. Sa umpisa pa lang alam na alam ko. Pero kahit totoong alam ko sa sarili ko ang bagay na 'yan. Mas pinili kong magbulagbulagan kasi akala ko makikita mo din ako, hindi bilang kaibigan o kapatid kundi bilang isang babae. Akala ko sa paglipas ng panahon ay matututunan mo din akong mahalin at piliin kahit pa iniwan ka niya. Akala ko mapapalitan ko siya sa puso mo. Ngunit sa paglipas ng panahon. Mas lalong maging malinaw ang lahat. Naging sobrang linaw na hindi na kayang maging bulag bulagan. Hindi ko maiwasang mag tanong kung anong mali sa sarili ko. Ako naman yung nandito sa tabi mo pero bakit hindi ako? Bakit kahit wala na siya ay kalaban ko pa din siya diyan sa puso mo? Bakit kahit wala na siya ay kahati ko pa din siya sa diyan sa atensyon mo? Bakit... Bakit hinihintay mo pa din siyang bumalik sa'yo?