Funny Texts & Jokes

Reads 3,483
Votes 152
Parts 13
Time <5 mins

Reads 3,483
Votes 152
Parts 13
Time <5 mins

funnytexts jokesandpuns lol sarcasmservedfresh

Funny texts and jokes! 



                                                       Funeral Text


Jack: Dude my phone rang during the funeral!!!

                          Ivan: So?

Jack: My ringtone is highway to hell...All Rights Reserved

funnytexts jokesandpuns lol sarcasmservedfresh

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13 parts

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"Is your refrigerator running?" "No, my refrigerator is not running." "Well you better...wait, what?" "Actually, it broke down a week ago because it knew that you were going to call with that stupid line and it decided it would rather die than listen to you say it. So now, thanks to you, I don't have a fridge and all of my food has gone bad." • • • Sometimes you find the crucial answers in the weirdest of places...and people.

[COMPLETE] A story of a girl who had a massive crush on a heartthrob high school rock band leader Kyle Hogan. Her life turn upside down when she received a text from an unknown number who admitted to be her secret admirer. Me: I understand why you're ignoring me Me: I'm going to slide out of this conversation Me: love you Me: okay bye Me: sorry again Unknown number: Was your father a thief? Unknown number: 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes © 2015 Tattoo Heart #1 in humour | [18.06.2018] ***[ON EDITING]*** **PLEASE BEWARE OF TYPOS AND GRAMMATICAL ERROR**

Rated R for foul language. --------- What happens when someone steals your phone and changes all your contacts to one person? --------- "Even the word b!tch won't suffice." ~ Damian "Damian is in love with mushrooms. Thank you for obtaining your first fact!" ~ Unknown "The f*ck?" ~ Damian

❝Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.❞ ❝That would be you.❞ ❝You're a smooth motherfucker, aren't you?❞ In which Nico desperately needs advice and finds a payphone, but he has nobody to call. And then the payphone rings. And Nico answers. And over a series of phone calls with a witty, feisty female, Nico falls in love. But sometimes, God likes to fuck it up a bit. Just for shits and giggles. ---------- Copyright © 2018 by Sierra Soriano. All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

in which a boy accidentally adds the wrong number to his band mates group chat, sparking and unexpected relationship STATUS ... completed STARTED ... jan 20, '21 COMPLETED ... may 23 '22 texting, instagram, and real life

Their father was an abusive man who went out each night to get drunk, and their mother was an angel sent directly from Heaven to protect them. It all changed the moment their youngest brother was brought into the world, removing their mother completely from it. You would think, life couldn't get any worse.. I mean, you already have five younger brothers who most of the time don't get along with each other, and a father who will beat you just for breathing. Well... we thought it couldn't get much worse, until our youngest pulled a knife on our father to protect one of us.. We're six brothers, who never get along, but will protect each other no matter the consequences. Even when our old man shows up at the front door after being released from prison.

"I may work here, but that doesn't mean I drink coffee." "Why?" "Well, why dont you like cats?" "I'm allergic to cats." "Then, let's just say I'm allergic to coffee." #5 in Short Story [7/15/16] Book Three From Texts and Calls Series © Copyrights Reserved

When Judaline gets a call from her college's latest soccer star, she doesn't expect him to be a goof. But self-proclaimed goofball, Caleb White makes it his mission to impress the sassy girl with cheesy song lyrics, childish talks and lots of laughter. One phone call. Many songs. Lots of smiles. "So do you like the Beatles?" ''Y-yeah, why do you-" "Hey Jude, don't make it bad-" "Please don't." "Take a sad song and make it better." " ............" __________________________________ These are a series of dialogues over text/call. ____________________________________ HIGHEST RANKING: #1 Call #1 Dialogue #2 Pick up lines

who is this? "It's me" "ur best friend?" "u know" "besties for resties" "till deathties?" "friend till the end" "lets play pretend :D" "no?" doesn't ring a bell

The Dangers of Butt Dialing by GreyEyedGirl02

"ive probably been butt dialing you..." "butt dialing. you. butt. dialed. me." -------------------- carlas life was running pretty smoothly until she keeps receiving calls from an unknown caller. her life starts to change in the form of late night calls, cheesy movies, frustrating accidental calls, and laughter. **extended summary inside #15 in phone #2 in cellphonenovel

The Number On The Napkin

"Is your refrigerator running?" "No, my refrigerator is not running." "Well you better...wait, what?" "Actually, it broke down a week ago because it knew that you were going to call with that stupid line and it decided it would rather die than listen to you say it. So now, thanks to you, I don't have a fridge and all of my food has gone bad." • • • Sometimes you find the crucial answers in the weirdest of places...and people.

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