Squidward X reader one shots?? This is a joke I swear

It's just gonna be Squidward x reader put in different situations I guess. At least I think this is how one shots work? No specific storyline, each chapter is like one page long and each one is a separate short story. I'm writing this as a joke, I swear. It's not like I want him to pin me to the bed and feel all over me with his tentacles as he slowly slides his clarinet into my a