Story cover for Homeward Bound Part One: An Unexpected Journey by D3-ISeeFire
Homeward Bound Part One: An Unexpected Journey
  • Reads 18,971
  • Votes 798
  • Parts 51
  • Time 16h 15m
  • Reads 18,971
  • Votes 798
  • Parts 51
  • Time 16h 15m
Complete, First published Dec 31, 2020
Bilba Baggins couldn't be happier. She's embraced her Baggins' half and has placated her Took half with a short trip to Bree (the most adventure she ever wishes to have). In addition, she is convinced Fram Harfoot, the most eligible bachelor in all of Hobbiton, will soon declare his eternal love for her - particularly after he sees the dinner she's prepared for him. When the knock sounds on her door she just knows it heralds the first day of the rest of her life as a respectable, and entirely proper, Hobbit.

Instead of her Happily Ever After, however, Bilba gets a company of Dwarves - complete with their obnoxious leader who MIGHT be vaguely attractive if he ever stopped ruining it by opening his mouth.

Clearly the only possible explanation is somewhere, in a past life, she must have done something truly AWFUL to deserve this.
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Bilba and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

8 parts Complete

Modern AU Crack/Humor/Fluff - Bilba and Thorin get into a fight and, as they are both prideful and stubborn, neither one can quite bring themselves to simply admit to their part and apologize. Bilba finally has enough of the stalemate and decides the most brilliant and epic solution ever would be to kidnap Thorin and lock him in the basement until he gives in, admits it was all his fault and begs for her forgiveness . It's possible she might have been a WEE bit drunk when she came up with, and executed, this plan. Of course now that she's done it she can't back down. That would be like admitting Thorin was right...somehow. She's not quite as firm on that point but what IS clear is Thorin looks far to smug for a kidnap victim which means she is certainly not admitting her plan was not the most epic and well thought out plan in the history of epic and well thought out plans. Even when she realizes Frerin might have been a witness meaning she has to kidnap him too...and Dwalin shows up acting all suspicious so of COURSE she has to kidnap him........ There just MAY have been one...or two TINY flaws in her plan after all but that doesn't mean it wasn't still epic! Thorin will rue the day he crossed her!