Red lines

Red lines

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WpMetadataReadOngoing<5 mins
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Tue, Jan 5, 2021
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Fiction
Romance
Trigger Warning! This story is based on depression and self harm TW! metion of rape, abuse and ED Her tears silently feel down her red cheeks. You deserve this... Failure... Disappointment...Then... She drew. Everything was quiet. She could hear the water dripping from the sink, her heart beating, and for the fist time, her thoughts had vanished. If only for a second. It was like all the weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She breathed out. All the attention was now on her wrist, she looked down. A red line formed on her. She watched as the blood flowed out, and down her arm. It was like some of the pain in her heart had been temporarily removed. Her tears kept flowing, as she continued drawing. One more...... 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7 cuts. She took a deep breath, as she laid her head back on the cold wall. She sat there for a several minutes. Quiet. Feeling the stinging sensation on her wrist. She finally got up from the bathroom floor, and made her way over to the sink. She slightly flinched when the cold water hit her cuts. Ouch... she mumbled. She cleaned the cuts, and went into the kitchen to find a bandage. Silently, she made her way back to her room. She looked out of her window. The moon shone bright trough the window, and lighted the dark room. She sighed, and laid down in her cold bed, desperately trying to sleep. Desperately trying to get the thoughts to disappear. You don't deserve to be alive... Everyone would be happier if you died... You're a waste of space... You're a waste of air... Just kill yourself already... She closed her eyes, going to sleep with one wish. Please... make it stop...
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so, I've been struggling for a long time now, and I never told anyone about it. I've never opened up. but I met someone who understands how I feel, and I'm beginning to feel again. I don't know how to do it, but I finally feel I can fight. I've been so exhausted. I'm not better, I'm not sure if i ever will be, but I'm not numb, not entirely. I can't say how I'm feeling, or what i am going to write, but if you want it, it's here. This is for you. For everyone who was made to be the villain by those meant to be by their sides. For everyone with a sensitive heart made to grow strong much too quickly. For everyone who struggles to get out of bed in the morning. For everyone who never could find the words to say why. For everyone who struggles to feel and for everyone who feels too much. For everyone who had to pick themselves back up. For everyone who had to parent themselves. For everyone fighting an invisible battle. For everyone who has been underestimated. For everyone who has to flee to other worlds to cope. For everyone who found other means to silence their voices. For everyone who was silenced. For everyone who was over powered. For everyone who was made to be less. For everyone who had to watch someone else suffer and stay silent. For everyone asking themselves, why? Why would you do this? What did I do? Why is this happening to me? It was never your fault.

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