Fiction or Fate
- Reads 19
- Votes 2
- Parts 3
MatureOngoing7m
Last published Mon, Jan 11, 2021
There might be some smut. I'm not sure how bad it'll get but we shall see. This is a Shronkey fic or Shrek x Donkey. This is a joke and I am sorry. Well... mostly sorry. I guess I should mention that this is in an AU where the events of the Shrek movie don't happen. I do not claim to own the characters in the story or anything in the Shrek franchise.
All Rights Reserved
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I wrote this when I was drunk. The extent to which I was inebriated shall henceforth not be discussed. As an essential disclaimer, I do not own any of the characters, brands, places, or things discussed in this story. Of course, hopefully you already knew that one cannot own a human for a human is already owned by themselves. Although, if Marthe Woertman, Harry Styles, or Shrek do not own themselves I am entirely willing to campaign for their freedom. I am also deeply sorry to the above should they ever come across this literary masterpiece. Which would be tragic. A complete and utter disaster. Anyways this is a story about love of the not at all heterosexual variety. While there are disturbing mentions of previous heterosexuality it is not discussed at length or in detail. Also if you came to this story seeking Harry Styles or Shrek, while they are both key characters, it is mostly about Marthe Woertman and an entirely fictional girl who is simply pining for a hot, tall, dutch, Leo. I also wouldn't read this if you have any standards at all. I warn you, it is Hallmark Christmas Movie/Wattpad Fanfic crossover and simply should not exist. It is not rated mature because it does not have...y'know...the canoodling? the hickory dickory dock? the secret touchy thing? in it because it does not. I rated it that way because I did not, and I shall repeat, I did not proof read this at all. Also I don't really know anything about Marthe Woertman. Or Amsterdam. This will be wildly inaccurate in every respect. I just got crunk, was watching tiktoks, and I decided that I really like the woman's cheek bones and accent and astrological sign so the next time I got crunk I wrote an entire novel. Also Harry Styles and Shrek are both villains. Sorry.Complete
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Shrek The Third: The Would Be King & I [Book 3]
~Sequel to Shrek 2: Happily 'N'Ever After [Book 2]~ Uncle Connor: Now remember: No nagging, bragging, sweating, fretting, slipping, tripping, slurping, burping, twittering, or frittering allowed. Me: What if I fall gracefully? Zero: That's literally the same thing as slipping and tripping, minus the graceful part. Me: Really? Aunt Ella: Yes. Me: So...I can get away with falling gracefully, then? Alice: No...not unless you're doing it on purpose to catch someone's attention~ As you can tell, that's how my lessons on learning to be a proper Princess usually start. Strict lessons on manners, learning the history of the past royals, which cutlery you have to use with certain meals, etc. etc. Blah, blah, blah. And the worst lesson of them all: Ballroom dancing! On top of that, I'm constantly reminded that I need to find my 'true love' and receive true love's kiss by sunset on my 17th birthday, otherwise I turn into a frozen statue just like my parents, grandmother, and kingdom, and stay like that forever. When Shrek asked me to go with him to visit Worcestershire Academy and find Arthur Pendragon, the one uncle Harold mentioned before he took his final breath, you could imagine the relief I felt to finally have the opportunity to escape my lessons without someone dragging me back every time I tried to ditch them. Question is: Will I be able to break the spell before the deadline? What if Arthur is 'the one'? Will I finally get the happy ending everybody keeps teasing me about? Completed: 25/03/2021 ✔️ Shrek: Once Upon A True Love's Kiss [Book 1] ✔️ Shrek 2: Happily 'N' Ever After [Book 2] ✔️ Shrek The Third: The Would Be King & I [Book 3] ✔️ **Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing, with the exception of Willow, Alice, and Zero, and this fanfic. All rights go to Dreamworks, Don Bluth, etc. Any fan art used belongs to their rightful owners. This is literally a fanfic made for fans of fans - nothing more, nothing less.**Complete
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