A Match to Water
  • Reads 1,823
  • Votes 68
  • Parts 14
  • Time 1h 52m
  • Reads 1,823
  • Votes 68
  • Parts 14
  • Time 1h 52m
Complete, First published Nov 02, 2014
Laying on the ground I couldn’t tell if I was alive or on the verge of death. I felt alive, but I was in a corpses body. But of course, if I was dead who would really care? Parents? My ‘friends’? My relatives, oh I don’t even want to think about that.. No one would really care..at least that is what I thought. Looking over at my wrists I see the familiar red color coming out, but it was worse. Much worse. Feeling my eyes start to close of fatigue I let them fall, I’m tired...all I need is a little..rest.
	The loud slamming of a door comes to my ears but I pay no attention, it was probably just the wind or my dad coming home not knowing his own strength and breaking the door. But that wasn’t on my mind right now. Rest. Thats all I need. A break. A time out. A chance to get away. Just a little time. One thing that came to my mind was that song. That song. I was absolute in love with that song, though I never really knew why. It was just that feeling inside that, made you feel connected. Yes. That song. Pierce the Veil, oh his voice is beautiful.. Just can calm me and make me fall asleep.
	On the verge of life or death I feel like, I’m floating. Something is holding me. Either the arms of angels or demons I don’t know. Just I was floating. The grip around me gets tighter, it wasn’t flames or clouds that I was getting lowered into. It was softer than clouds. It was one of the best places. I obviously have been here at least once, or I wasn’t at all. Maybe in one of my dreams. In a daydream. I wasn’t sure. But whatever or whoever this was made me feel comfortable, something that I haven’t been able to have. 
	I hear this low voice above right above me, it was sad, full of regret, and most of all wanting. Begging. Pleading. Screaming. Crying. 
	“Wake up! I know you can hear me!”
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[BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ Depression