Story cover for aftermath  by ihateyouiloveyouu
aftermath
  • WpView
    LECTURAS 169
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    Votos 5
  • WpPart
    Partes 9
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  • WpView
    LECTURAS 169
  • WpVote
    Votos 5
  • WpPart
    Partes 9
  • WpHistory
    Hora <5 mins
Continúa, Has publicado mar 01, 2021
Contenido adulto
Dealing with a chronic illness that is considered "invisible" is infuriating. At 19 years old, I've been sick for over a year, with the effects of long haul covid-19, seizures, POTS, extreme pain, wheelchair bound, anemia, etc., and it is extremely draining and lonesome. As someone with CPTSD, from being sexually assaulted, it makes dealing with sickness very challenging. These poems is about the aftermath of it all.
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This is a collection of my writing from the past 7 years. Before I started to write, I was a very lost individual, as are most teens, but I was lost in darkness. I was too afraid to move anywhere at all. I hid in the dark, debilitated by my own anxiety, sadnesses, anger, and hopelessness. I was desperate to be loved and feared it the most, I was a coward, I was self-destructive, I would mentally bend my thoughts to the point of bordering insanity. I was born into this world alone, and got too comfortable with it. Maybe I still am, but a fraction of what I used to be. This writing is extremely vulnerable, and potentially disturbing to others, as all my weaknesses, strengths, obsessions with making every moment sentimental, the sickening desperation I've had, the destructiveness, and the constant brutal reconstruction of my mind. Without guidance, it's been absolute intense chaos. Though, there is beauty in the darkness. Everything can be found in the darkness. You'll find that through my writing, I've somehow slowly become exactly what I've written. A living representation of my writing and what I wanted to be. Without myself even knowing it. A lot of my writing themes are based around nature, or some kind of natural aspect. The imagery I paint with natural metaphors is constant, the animals, just like you and I, the plants, and all other living things. I planted these seeds in my mind, unknowingly at the time, where I now feel the deep dark green jungle pressing at the inner walls of my skull. It's all that I want to consume my mind. There's so much to learn. The magic of nature, and it's infinite wisdom. It's as if I have been on this path all along, and I didn't even know what I was doing, yet my body and mind were passively taking care of me. Giving me and eventually showing exactly what I want, and wanted to become. I have every moment, every instance of suffering, and every epiphany to be thankful for. Soon, I'll be at peace from the raging storm.
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Scratching the Surface (Poems)

120 partes Concluida

UPDATE: I wrote these when I was 13 and depressed all the time. I'm 18 now, and, fortunately, life's been going well! Unfortunately, these poems are fairly cringe, so read at your own risk. Just some poems that I write when I'm in the poetic mood. Occasionally, there might be some other people's poems. I should warn you that these can get kind of dark. Updates will be whenever I feel like it. Highest Rank: #84 in Poetry