Untitled Fears - Liv1844 - Wattpad

Untitled Fears

Reads 300
Votes 1
Parts 11
Time 1h 9m

Reads 300
Votes 1
Parts 11
Time 1h 9m

Mature

abuse angst bravetogether comatose cutting gaylove gunshots happyending selfdepreciation selfhatred suicidalthoughts

I was close to dying if not from my sister. I went from bitches at school to my alcoholic, addict abusing mother. Then my best friend decided he wanted stop be part of the crew that cries for me to give me another reason to live. I didn't want another one but...it feels nice.

Warning: This is rated MATURE for a reason. Mentions of cutting, abuse, alcoholism, bullying, gayness, and Gacha pictures because they help me visualize my characters better. If any of these things make you uncomfortable, get the hell away from my story, no one said you had to sit here and read this. 
I am not a professional writer but I did try with what my pain and emotions gave me. The entirety of the story is explained over time so if you want to sit and read, be my guest. Our protagonist is Ryan and let's just say he's gonna go through hell and back.All Rights Reserved

abuse angst bravetogether comatose cutting gaylove gunshots happyending selfdepreciation selfhatred suicidalthoughts

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11 parts

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Secret Mind ✓ by sadlyish

"She's right! She's right! I don't cut in the right spot." My hold tightens on my wrist. The red blood oozes out of my wrist. I slide up and grab my bag and run out of the bathroom. I don't care if people can see the blood I just want to get out. I race for the doors and shove through people. I earn a lot of glares and glances that read "weirdo." I ignore and push. I run to my house and lock myself in my bathroom. I don't bother closing the front door cause I don't care if people come in to kill me. I grab my razor and cut deep cuts into my arm and wrists falling into a pool of my own blood. • • • Evangeline has a great life. Friends? Check! Good grades? Check! Loving family? Check! But what if she has secrets that nobody knows of? What if the only thing she can trust is her secret diary? What if slowly but surly she's dying inside? How can an innocent twelve year old deal with these problems? Will she keep on facing these problem till the day she breaks. Her school burns down forcing her into a different school to meet different people and she has to fit into a different lifestyle as well. Meet Evangeline. Now at 17 years of age in a new high school. Not all girls anymore. No uniform. Meet Drake. Your classic bad-boy. He just moved to Saint Abigail high school. He is assigned partners with the quiet, calm, unnoticed Evangeline. As time progresses he finds that she isn't as happy on the inside as she is on the outside. Can he save her? Or is it too late? • • • Some rude language. Depression and cutting. Don't say I didn't warn you. Okay, I wrote this at the start of this year (may 2016) and I had very poor writing skills. This book hasn't been edited and the whole idea is cliche so I wouldn't recommend you read it but I'm not stopping you, either. Read at your own risk. • • • Copyright © 2017 by -moonlust. All rights reserved.

Noah (Obsessions in Overdrive #1) by MarcelinePierson

I've always had a feeling that I would die young. Ever since I started pondering on deaths door I've had this feeling. I could care less about the hell and heaven shenanigans, but death. I want it. The end of my life. I want to be in my suit, in my coffin, in the ground and my soul to be gone. I've been waiting for 16 years, yet no sign of death opening his door no matter how many times I ring his doorbell. Yeah, I enjoy thinking about my end. Especially at moments like this... *** #1 physical #1 cuteguys #1 addiction #2 self-esteem *** Started: 7 November 2022 Finished: 18 April 2024

Crushed Underneath the Surface by Michelle_90210

For years, I've been writing in silence, creating worlds, characters, and stories that lived only in the margins of my notebooks and tucked-away folders on my computer. Writing has always been my escape, something I've done for myself-a way to step out of reality for a moment and breathe through the lives of the people I've imagined. I've written and rewritten countless stories, always hesitant to share them, never quite confident enough to let anyone else peek into the depths of my mind. It's always felt like just a hobby, something personal, something safe. But deep down, I've carried a quiet dream of becoming a writer, even though it felt a little foolish to hope for something so big. Now, after pouring myself into this story for what feels like a lifetime, I've finally done it-I've uploaded all my chapters to Wattpad, sharing this piece of me with the world. I know I still have so much to learn, and I'm always striving to get better, but I would truly appreciate any feedback-good, constructive criticism that can help me grow. This is just the beginning, but it feels like a huge step forward. Thank you for taking a chance on this book. Whatever brought you here, whether it was curiosity, a recommendation, or just a moment of wandering, I am truly grateful.

Finding Purpose (+18) ✔️ by ZaynismRules

***this book contains suicidal thoughts and tendencies, may not be appropriate for younger audiences*** In which she looks for the purpose of life. Lily Carter's parents died in a car crash leaving her and Laura, girl was depressed long before her parents passed away and with all the problems turning up now, Lily felt more miserable - if that's even possible. With her journey to look for life's purpose and grab the small pinch of HOPE - which is ironically her second name -, will she finally snap at the pressure and finally end it all? or will a small light lit her darkened world of grief and loneliness? * "So you know. The little goth girl who gets bullied is indeed a mess. There's this mess in her head that eats her alive everyday isn't it? What to do now Kaden? Tell the whole neighborhood and recieve an award for taking out a crazy in this world?" I spit like vomit. His eyes warmed up as I finished, "Lily. It isn't like that" "What is it then? People stopped caring... they gave up, why aren't you?" I fought my tears. "Because I feel the need to care. Did Leigh hurt you? Did she hit you?" he finally noticed the unusual redness of my cheek. I don't like the way he told me he needed to care for me. I felt like an obligation, a responsibility that he is carrying and carrying leads to getting tired and when people gets tired, they give up. I don't want them to give up on me. But they will, so it's good not to make them care for me in the first place. "I never needed anyone. I stopped needing anyone before, why start now?" I uttered the words again. Why? There is nothing to fight for. No mama. No papa. No sister to love me. No one. So why would I waste my life and the time of others to fix what is already broken - and someone who doesn't want to be fixed? If I may add. Maybe I gave up. No, scratch that. I gave up a long time ago - when my parents died, my hope and purpose went away with them.

My Experiment | Adam Uthman x Female Reader by DamiansLilHuman

NOT MY ART FOR THE COVER ⚠️TRIGGER WARNING⚠️THIS STORY/BOOK DOES CONTAIN MENTIONS OF SELF-HARM, SUICIDE, STRONG LANGUAGE, AND OTHER SENSITIVE TOPICS!!! PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION!!!⚠️ Y/n, a female bartender. All she needs at the end of the day is money and probably a week's worth of sleep. Y/N and her best friend, Elizabeth, work at the city's local bar. You both get harassed every day by hundreds of customers and even your own boss. To keep track of your everyday life and to avoid the thoughts of hurting yourself, you write your day at work in your Journal. Things go according to plan every day; go to work, expect the worst, get home, sleep, repeat. Nothing has ever really changed. One night, you and Elizabeth run into her ex from college. Somehow with little interaction with each other, you instantly fall for him. His strong French accent drew you in right away. The night you both ran into each other by accident changed everything for the both of you. This is my first time writing a story from a fandom so please ignore any cringy parts or words. I try to make it first person the best I can too. This IS a slow burn so chapters can be long and some can be short. I try to make up a different world than the original fandom but I do try to add bits of the fandom into the story. NEGATIVITY IS NOT WELCOME HERE!!! CRAZY_KIZZ and Kassithetherian11 are the top supporters of this story and this is dedicated to them! Check out their profiles and their stories ^^

The Rejected Fire Wolf by MemE050222

Hunter Anther was never good at hiding his feelings, that's why he couldn't hide that he was damn gay. And being part of one of the largest packs to ever exist, he became an abomination. Even to his own family. Everyone hated him, everyone bullied him. He though maybe after meeting his mate, girl, or boy he would be alright and try to live the rest of his life like how he wanted. But the thing is he was unsure if he will get a mate. The moon goddess wasn't fond of him because in addition to being an outcast, he wasn't blessed with a wolf. What will happen when his future Alpha, aka biggest bully and former friend turns out to be his mate. Will he accept and care for him or make him lose the last bit of hope he had? Is he strong enough to withstand the pain and struggle thrown at him and make a living out of it? *** "I didn't mean it.. I.. I was young and ignorant..." he tried to explain while clenching my hand, I looked at him in disgust and pulled my hand away. "What about me? How old wad I to deserve all the things you did to me?! Tell me, how was I different from you? Four years ago you rejected me after everything you've done to me. It wasn't enough punishment for you, you didn't even spare me a glance after ruining me. You left me, you are not gay." My voice trembled bit at the end but my face remained as emotionless as ever. I will never give him the satisfaction of seeing me vulnerable, not again. But why does my heart feel like it's bleeding? Shouldn't I be hating him and happy that he's on his knees begging me. So why am I tearing along with him? **** 25/02/24 - 9/08/24 **** A/N How many of us believe in second chances? Does love really conquer it all? This is not a 'love is blind' story, if you're looking for one.

Family Comes First by CRAZY40429

Being alone? Check. Being afraid? Check. Being abused? Check times 3. Honestly, my life wasn't this bad before, not until I ended in foster care... SIKE! My life was always bad. From the moment I was born, I lived with an abusive father who blamed me for my mother's death, and even I couldn't disagree with him. Here are a few questions I am constantly asked: 'Do I do well in school?' No, are you kidding me? The only subject I'm good at is Visual Arts. 'Do I have a kind and caring family?' No, I don't think I do. 'Do I have anyone who cares about me?' No, I'm a loner and socially awkward. 'Do I have privileges?' No, if you haven't understood the message yet, I live in an abusive household. Now, you might ask if there are any questions the answer is yes. I'll give you some. 'Do I want to die?' Yes, I sometimes do. 'Do I feel alone in this world?' Yes, always. 'Do I get a beating every day?' Yes. *** This is Amara Williams, a 13 year-old with average grades and no friends. What happens when her only guardian, her dad, is dead? What happens when she finds out that she has five older brothers who are not only strict and demanding, but also protective assholes? More importantly, what happens when she finds out that she was taught lies from the moment she was born? Follow Amara as she digs deeper into her family history, uncovering the secrets and discovering the lies. ___ ⚠️ Trigger Warning ⚠️ There will be mentions of abuse, r@pe, self harm, death, and many other dark themes. I have given a warning now, and I will give a TW in each chapter when reading for safety reasons. However, I want all of my readers to know what to expect so that they can decided for themselves if they want to read. Read at your own discretion! ____ Highest Rankings: #1 in Rules: Oct. 18. 2020 #1 in Truth: Jan. 16. 2021 #1 in Alcohol: Jun. 18. 2021

Coming of Age: The Journey of a Teenaged Drug Dealer by real_benjammin

Why do you pick fights with other boys? It's the question Ryan has been running from all his life. The answer will shock you. For as long as Ryan can remember, he's always wanted to be someone special. Now, a promising high school wrestler and a popular drug dealer, he's achieved the life he's dreamed of. He gets to go to all the fun parties, hang out with the cool kids, and be in a relationship with a beautiful girl who he loves. But Ryan's success is going to be bittersweet. A tragedy strikes someone close to him, creating a domino effect of self destruction. Ryan finds himself in a conflict where the repercussions threaten to destroy his life and potentially end it. Creeping in Ryan's thoughts is the source of his ambitions; a terrible secret he's unwilling to address. Go down the rabbit hole. Explore the fascinating chaos. You'll never forget what you read. Coming of Age is about the tragic experiences some teenagers go through and many others are aware of. The story explores themes like identity, ambition, love, trauma, forgiveness, free will, and redemption. Sensitive subject matter like drug addiction, extreme poverty, abuse, and violence are touched on, but in an honest, non-exploitative way. The story is based on my experiences as a teenager dealing mental health issues and the people I knew. Writing is my way to raise awareness of the issues I went through. I want to speak to people who can relate to my story and bring understanding to those that don't.

Outcast by checkered_ring

Heads up this story is pretty old and kinda bad so I don't rlly recommend reading😬 Anyway ~~~~ "P-please, just leave m-me alone," I whisper, mentally slapping myself for stuttering. "Oh? Does the outcast want to talk?" she asks. --- For Jamie, being a senior in high school isn't easy for them. Bullies treat them like trash everyday, and it's even worse when you're the odd one out. Literally, being non-binary in a Christian school. Until a few nice people start reaching out...maybe it won't be so bad... ‼️CAUTION//TW: CONSTANT MENTIONS SELF HARM, SUICIDE, GRIEF, AND BULLYING‼️

I Fell in Love with a Bad Boy by Beautiful_Tragedy8

CRINGE WARNING! First book I ever wrote on here!! -- "Sometimes the person who you are willing to take a bullet for is the person behind the gun." I stood peering over the cold lifeless body that lay before my eyes. I had always thought of death the enemy, but right now, I blessed it upon the person who is now at peace. Sometimes you don't need to be the smartest, or the fastest, but you do need to be wisest. They say the blood runs deeper than water, and I believe it, because even though the people that we love can turn on us and begin to hate us, they are only human, meaning that soon they will begin to see how short life really is and how it is not to be wasted. People who seem perfect and they look like they have no floors'; they are the people who are suffering, like I was. But I found my savior in the most uncommon place. He was able to look through my mask, he saw the cracks, and tried to fix the broken girl that hid away deep inside the girl who only wanted to be seen as 'fine'. I slowly began to find comfort and safety in him, and I did the same to him. We were two broken people becoming whole. Someone once said when you pass, if you can count your true friends on one hand you are beyond lucky, and I even though I did not like the person that lay before me, I know that he once had true friends, including me. I'm a 17 year old girl who has suffered more than any other, beginning to believe that 'Hope' was just another word the people throw around. Until I fell in love with a badboy. Trailer to the side -------------------> Made By @Laura__1 Cover made by @Beautiful_Tragedy8 Copyright 2014

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Slide 1 of 10

Secret Mind ✓ cover

Noah (Obsessions in Overdrive #1) cover

Crushed Underneath the Surface cover

Finding Purpose (+18) ✔️ cover

My Experiment | Adam Uthman x Female Reader cover

The Rejected Fire Wolf cover

Family Comes First cover

Coming of Age: The Journey of a Teenaged Drug Dealer cover

I Fell in Love with a Bad Boy cover

Secret Mind ✓

"She's right! She's right! I don't cut in the right spot." My hold tightens on my wrist. The red blood oozes out of my wrist. I slide up and grab my bag and run out of the bathroom. I don't care if people can see the blood I just want to get out. I race for the doors and shove through people. I earn a lot of glares and glances that read "weirdo." I ignore and push. I run to my house and lock myself in my bathroom. I don't bother closing the front door cause I don't care if people come in to kill me. I grab my razor and cut deep cuts into my arm and wrists falling into a pool of my own blood. • • • Evangeline has a great life. Friends? Check! Good grades? Check! Loving family? Check! But what if she has secrets that nobody knows of? What if the only thing she can trust is her secret diary? What if slowly but surly she's dying inside? How can an innocent twelve year old deal with these problems? Will she keep on facing these problem till the day she breaks. Her school burns down forcing her into a different school to meet different people and she has to fit into a different lifestyle as well. Meet Evangeline. Now at 17 years of age in a new high school. Not all girls anymore. No uniform. Meet Drake. Your classic bad-boy. He just moved to Saint Abigail high school. He is assigned partners with the quiet, calm, unnoticed Evangeline. As time progresses he finds that she isn't as happy on the inside as she is on the outside. Can he save her? Or is it too late? • • • Some rude language. Depression and cutting. Don't say I didn't warn you. Okay, I wrote this at the start of this year (may 2016) and I had very poor writing skills. This book hasn't been edited and the whole idea is cliche so I wouldn't recommend you read it but I'm not stopping you, either. Read at your own risk. • • • Copyright © 2017 by -moonlust. All rights reserved.