The Chronicles Of Me

The Chronicles Of Me

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Lilac's life has always been far from perfect, but one day she decides to pick up a pen and write. She begins to write the truth about the life that she has experienced, the lessons she's learned, and the things that she has missed. Everyday she continues to pick up the pen, writing the truth at all cost. ---------------------------- Growing up I never had nannies, I had babysitters, one woman with as many kids as she could have and handle. Most of the time passing the younger ones off to the older ones, often seeming to be hanging on by a thread. Back then I never knew, I never understood the truth behind the person who would provide part-time care. It was a hustle. A way to make ends meet, a way to stay alive. As years passed by I began to fathom the meaning behind hustle. Soon I would have to experience it myself making my black and white blinders fall off and showcasing the full of color of the world. Full of pain and anguish, happiness and joy, and everything in between. While this story is the farthest thing ever from a fairy tale, it's still a story about love, hope, and freedom. As I paint these pages with words, that create The Chronicles Of Me.
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I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypnotized my thoughts and paralyzed my thinking. I learned the hard way that love isn't leaning in for a kiss, and a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a punching bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. I tried to be there for my lover, but I learned it is impossible to fix the broken pieces when the glass has shattered. There will always be pieces that are not repairable. However, I kept going right back to the person who I needed to walk away from. I was afraid, and I wasn't brave enough to wake up from this nightmare! I made the choice to suffer when life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. Will I find the courage to know my worth and know that I deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in my ears? Will I have the strength to fight my insecurities? Will, I set myself free, or will I let my love be the death of me?

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