This story is also on AO3 under "Mental" by Aech 110 Sam (Sam felt that everything that he ever did was what caused him and his brother to be stuck. Sam has suffered. He's lost a lot. Growing up with only a brother and no permanent home. Just Dean. He's hurting and it's not going away. It never went away.) I felt like it was all my fault. I didn't want to feel sad anymore. Just for once, I wanted that hole in his heart to filled. Destruction. Pain. I hurt. Everybody died. Everybody died because of me. I had hope. But what else of me is there left. Dean (Dean felt that he was not worth saving. He felt that he could have done more. Raised Sam differently. Helped him more. Maybe they would have never ended up here if Dean was better himself. Sam was Dean's world. Dean was always there for Sam. Taking care of him but Dean doesn't know what to do anymore.) Am I worth it? No. I will never be worth anything. As long as I have my brother. That's it. As long as he lives. I was supposed to watch my brother suffer. Dad was never around. It was just me and Sam. I can't lose him to his mind. I can't lose myself. Why does everything have to feel? I don't want to feel like this anymore. I don't want Sam to feel like he can't do anything anymore. Castiel (Castiel was a part of a cult. Making everybody believe that they were angels of the lord. He was a soldier. He was supposed to keep them safe. Then Castiel started to question. Question everything. Castiel grew up within it all. And then he got out. But he wasn't "normal") I am an angel of the lord. I am Castiel. I was supposed to save them. Their lives were on my shoulders and I failed them. I failed all of them. They all fell because of me.All Rights Reserved