To build a Home

by intothesilentland (on ao3 this is just so I can keep my place in my reading go actcally check them out and give them some appreciation for this work)
Summary
Twenty-three years of head-over-heels, devastating devotion and love, love, love for the
man with bright eyes and dark hair. Fourteen years of friends, best friends, of always
together. One moment of rejection.
Nine years of apart. Nine years of heartbreak, nine years of continents away, of not
speaking, of no acknowledgement, no interaction, no closure, no peace. No happiness. Nine
years of Dean's life entering motions, going through them, constant, cold and mechanic,
like clockwork. Nine years of alone.
God. Nine years. A lot has changed. And yet Dean still loves Cas just the same. Even if his
heart hurts all kinds of different.
On the day of Jimmy Novak's funeral, Dean sees Cas for the first time in nine years. He
adored Castiel the moment he met him, at only four years old. But after fourteen years of
friendship destroyed by one moment of heartbreak, and after nine years of silence, Dean is convinced Cas will want nothing to do with him. And it's killing him.