Why I have trust issues: phan - Erin CMcF - Wattpad

Why I have trust issues: phan

Reads 111,700
Votes 5,074
Parts 25
Time 49m

Reads 111,700
Votes 5,074
Parts 25
Time 49m

amazingphil bulemia dan danisnotonfire depression howell lester phanfiction phil sad

Phil Lester has been bullied for years and when he is diagnosed with chronic depression it starts to go downhill.
But could the new boy prove to be the light in an otherwise dark world?
Read to find out.

Trigger Warning:
contains scenes of abuse, graphic violence, self harm, depression, bulemia, anorexia and other triggering thingsAll Rights Reserved

amazingphil bulemia dan danisnotonfire depression howell lester phanfiction phil sad

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Depression//Phan by bluetroyee

(tw: s*lf-h*rm, mentions of s*lf-h*rm, d*pr*ss*d scenes. May be triggering for some. Read at your own limit, please!) Phil Lester, a boy who's falling into depression slowly. And soon, his depression may end up falling to deep. He gets hateful and rude comments on his videos that he posts to YouTube. He even gets hate on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr. What did he ever do to them? What did he do to deserve any of this?? His flatmate Dan doesn't know about Phil's depression, however. All he knows (thinks, rather) is that his best friend is staying strong through all of the hateful things he gets from people. But in reality, that's not what Phil is doing at all. He's not staying strong through the hate. He's just faking the smile for Dan so he wouldn't get so worried about him. Sure, Dan might be able to crack some real smiles out of him once in a while, but not every time. He also wears long sleeves and thick bracelets to hide the scars of his pain. He acts like his normal quirky, adorable, funny, weird self when making YouTube videos, when around his friends and family, when having a meet-up with fans (or just being around them in general), when out in public, etc. Phil hadn't told anyone at all about his depression. And he probably wouldn't anytime soon, either. His fans didn't know, his friends didn't know, his family didn't know, Dan didn't know... nobody knew. But one day, would people push him over his limit? Would Dan be able to save him in time? © 2016 by bluetroyee. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

voices | phan au by gothboiiz

dan howell, nothing but a fuck up student and son. he knows the voices get the better of him, or does it? another voice comes, but this one is real. hes called phil lester. does phils voice change the thoughts of dan? or make it worse? ~ triggers : self harm, suicide, blood, anxiety & nervous breakdowns au's : depressed, high school (mainly adult life) boyxboy

Save Me From Myself » Daniel Howell AU by TheMeganHowell

[Trigger warning: Suicide, self-harm, eating disorders, and depression is mentioned many times in this story. Do not read if those things could trigger you.] Sadness and sorrow, you wouldn't expect those words to sum up the sister of Phil Lester, but they did.. She just feels like nothing. She needs someone to save her from herself. ©TheMeganHowell 2014 [Ahead of time, I would like to say that this was my first book after my long break from writing and me reading this is like Dan watching his first video. So much cringe. So it sucks. Stay away. Thanks.]

help me //phan by drownnme

When Phil, one of the nicest guys at school, starts falling down the hole of depression and getting bullied, he meets Dan, the popular fuck-boy of the school. Dan soon finds some of the dark, and kinda scary things Phil has been doing and tries to help Phil, before it's too late. ((Warning: Depression, Cutting, Suicidal Thoughts/Attempts, Eating Disorders, and Bullying)) I made this like a year ago this is so cringey but thanks for reading it! -/- cover by @blurrywhisperer -/-

Outcast ✧ Phan by cuddlephan

Dan Howell has telekinesis - a power just like out of a comic book. Yet instead of protecting the universe as a brave superhero, he hides. He hides his power and himself, fearing nothing more than getting attached to somebody and dragging them down. Of course, Phil Lester, the new kid in school, just had to come waltzing in, destroying his entire view on nearly everything in the worst (and best) ways possible. Phil's like a drug, and boy, is Dan addicted. Warning: contains self harm, depression, boyxboy, references towards abuse, and other possible triggers or content you may not be comfortable with. you can message me in private for the specifics if you feel you need it and remember to stay safe. (Top: #89 in Fanfiction, #1 in Phan!)

A day in the clouds by Rekindledlove

Dan Howell suffers from schizophrenia. The voices in his head tell him to do horrible things to himself and others, but the only thing grounding him to earth is the clouds in the sky. Phil Lester has sever depression and is struggling to keep going each day. All his life he had been a mer shell of a man. When they meet one day by fate, how will it all play out?

Midnight || Phan {Complete} by somesortofuser

Daniel Howell and Phil Lester have gone through a lot together. ***TRIGGER WARNING- SELF HARM / SUICIDE ATTEMPTS / DEPRESSION / HOMOSEXUALITY /SAD/ANGST***

10:05 ~ Phan Highschool AU by sixxdaysofmylife

Phil is bullied by everyone, or so he thinks. Other fandoms in this fan fiction: fall out boy, muse... trigger warnings: depression, suicidal thoughts/ actions, self harm, bulimia, anorexia

Things Change by wwhateverdudee

Dan's life always seemed to stay the same. As if it was on loop. Nothing interesting happened. Nothing made him happy. Everything was lifeless to Dan. However, one dark haired boy was going to change everything. -TRIGGER WARNING- Abuse Depression Anxiety Self harm Eating Disorders

Smile, Dan by kittylover573ds

DISCLAIMER: This story is mature because it will have some self harm in it. It will also have some swearing due to that's how Dan actually talks. This is not about Phan being real. I'm sorry to disappoint you. Now onto what it is really about: Dan Howell is becoming more and more depressed. His family, his community, not even his best friend, Phil Lester, can help him. He believes he's a lost cause, and he's a mistake. He tries to hide it best he can, but some nights, it's just too much. During this, he's lost his will to smile. He'll fake smiles for videos and pictures, but he's lost a reason to genuinely smile.

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Slide 1 of 10

Depression//Phan cover

voices | phan au cover

Save Me From Myself » Daniel Howell AU cover

help me //phan cover

Outcast ✧ Phan cover

A day in the clouds cover

Midnight || Phan {Complete} cover

10:05 ~ Phan Highschool AU cover

Things Change cover

Smile, Dan cover

Depression//Phan

(tw: slf-hrm, mentions of slf-hrm, dprss*d scenes. May be triggering for some. Read at your own limit, please!) Phil Lester, a boy who's falling into depression slowly. And soon, his depression may end up falling to deep. He gets hateful and rude comments on his videos that he posts to YouTube. He even gets hate on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr. What did he ever do to them? What did he do to deserve any of this?? His flatmate Dan doesn't know about Phil's depression, however. All he knows (thinks, rather) is that his best friend is staying strong through all of the hateful things he gets from people. But in reality, that's not what Phil is doing at all. He's not staying strong through the hate. He's just faking the smile for Dan so he wouldn't get so worried about him. Sure, Dan might be able to crack some real smiles out of him once in a while, but not every time. He also wears long sleeves and thick bracelets to hide the scars of his pain. He acts like his normal quirky, adorable, funny, weird self when making YouTube videos, when around his friends and family, when having a meet-up with fans (or just being around them in general), when out in public, etc. Phil hadn't told anyone at all about his depression. And he probably wouldn't anytime soon, either. His fans didn't know, his friends didn't know, his family didn't know, Dan didn't know... nobody knew. But one day, would people push him over his limit? Would Dan be able to save him in time? © 2016 by bluetroyee. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.