Someone You Loved

Someone You Loved

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Tue, Apr 12, 2022
"What are you going to do now?" I asked completely disheveled by the news she just confirmed. I stared at the small tray of drugs and pills that sat on her drawer, trying as much as I possibly could to distract myself. She looked too calm and at ease for someone going through this type of ailments. I on the other hand, was trying all that I could to not cry again infront of her. I haven't cried in freaking months, but through out today, I've been sobbing non-stop. "Nothing. There's really nothing I can do now". She smiled. I watched her calm resolve go down the drain as a single teardrop, streamed down her flushed cheeks. And just like that, I found myself crying for the fourth time today. **** Love, they say is one of the strongest forces on earth, and rightfully so. One is completely blinded and fooled by the intricacies of this vile feeling. The same feeling that has wholly engulfed me, but different in some way. The love I'd known all my life was from my family, a platonic or agape form of love, and even that came with it's share of hurt. The pain I felt when mum died was completely unimaginable, and deep. It felt like my soul was being injured, like my very being wasn't... complete anymore. It still isn't, but now it's so much worse. Why does life continually try to beat the crap out of me? Why show me a glimpse of hope when you know it won't last? Why drop someone as precious as Aurora into my life, then take her away?
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[BWWM] I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart. My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss. The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place. In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded. I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me. I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living. I had hit rock bottom. The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone. Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness. She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline. ••••••••••• ● Warnings ⚠️ ~ Mention of suicide ~ Anxiety attacks ~ Rape attempt ~ Mention of self-harm ~ Depression

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