Statehumans one-shots because why not? [SH crackfic] - FlamboyantBanana - Wattpad

Statehumans one-shots because why not? [SH crackfic]

FlamboyantBanana

Reads 3,826
Votes 150
Parts 31
Time 3h 16m

Reads 3,826
Votes 150
Parts 31
Time 3h 16m

FlamboyantBanana

absolutecrap america chaos countryhumans destruction friendship khaoswithakbecauseyes kinda murica noships notsounitedstates statehumans states texttospeech unitedstates usa

WARNING: This book will cause the loss of brain cells. It makes zero sense and I don't know how I even got one read. Seriously, you'll regret everything by reading this.
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What happens when a meeting gets interrupted by a child Yee-hawing through the wall? What happens when a certain Florida man throws a beach party? What happens when Christmas is hosted by Britain and he invited the ENTIRE FAMILY over? What happens when one state wants to start a sleepover that ends in a ski ramp off the roof? What happens when there's a monster in Hawaii's closet? What happens when the states rob a bank in a 50-person heist?!
Find out more on Disney Channel.
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WARNINGS:
1. This book is terribly written and meant to be humorous, no serious moments will happen unless I decide I want to ship states.
2. No need to worry about smut, I'm never writing that in a million years.
3. Ideas.
4. Maybe some gross things like falling into a dumpster fire? But don't worry, everyone will be okay in the end.
5. I might get political ??
6. I'm not into sports, so when I mention them it probably will turn out all wrong.
7. Pineapples on pizza.
8. Mentions of war (Maybe?) and probably some merciless killing followed by laughter.
9. Hamilton references?
10. No swear words, don't worry, I'm an innocent Banana with little knowledge of bad words.
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This is my second book and my first Statehumans book. Beware.
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As said in the title, this is complete crack. I write these in my free time. I used to write these VERY frequently (Like, two a day almost- I was insane) but now I'm very chill and haven typed in months (wHoOps) so sorry. At least you have 31 chapters to enjoy at the moment!
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Open to ideas!Creative Commons (CC) Attribution

absolutecrap america chaos countryhumans destruction friendship khaoswithakbecauseyes kinda murica noships notsounitedstates statehumans states texttospeech unitedstates usa

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31 parts

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Aftermath Plans || Amerus / Rusame by nobodiesafterdeath

"So what now, our alliance is over?" Russia licked his lips, his eyes were staring at just one point of the wooden desk. He could feel the other man's looks directed to his back, even though he didnt have any irises. Russia knew from experience at this point, how it felt to be watched. "You didn't help with any shit anyway." Russia said in a cold tone, his fingers reaching to grab the cold metallic pen laying close to tidied up documents. He heard America's breathy, hateful chuckle. "Then why-" "But no, it's not." Now he knew he got the other man's attention. He turned his head towards the black eyed man, who had stopped talking to listen to him now. "In fact." He continued. "-it just solidifies now." America hummed, sitting on the table. "Care to explain?" Russia stared at his starless nights with no emotion but plain hatred. "I want my father dead." He saw how wicked America's eyes shined with the declaration, but didn't comment on it. "And it will be quite hard without your help." /// 20.02.20 Slowburn Amerus/Rusame and even slowburner writer but i think i will finish this lmao THE STORY IS NOT EXACTLY HISTORICALLY ACCURATE. I tend to follow the key parts selected from Cold War but there are (mostly) things that made up or amplified to fit better in the story, so keep in mind! dedicated to @YoungerJustice who also drew the cover [ PLEASE READ ] I have Rusame in the title because thats the second ship name. If Russia not being the top is something that puts you off then i am sorry but this is not the book for you. This book will include heavy themes, i did not put +18 for nothing. If you hate it, don't waste your time leaving a hate comment. Just don't read it. I normally wouldn't even put this warning but better be safe than sorry! #1 amerus 23.10.21 #1 americaxrussia 23.10.21 #1 cold war 24.02.23 #1 countryhumansau 13.10.24 Thank you so much.

Lost by Ailanimaubee

(I'm currently editing) Imagine faking a personality so long you forget what your real personality is? Imagine being bullied in family meet ups by your own flesh and blood? Imagine being kidnapped by a crazy lunatic and coming back and acting like you went on holiday? Imagine confusion, just confusion, never do you understand what's going on? But you continue, just for them. But continuing was a bad idea. ... Vote, share and comment! For a dedicated chapter! Written by Ailanimaubee, all rights reserved! do not steal anything from this book, don't post it on a different website, and the other things people told me to write :) but really don't be a meanie, (ok ok I'll shut up before your ear drums bleed) Cringe Alert: I wrote this a long time ago. And looking back at it JUST CRINGE. You've been warned, this is not the best work out there. If you want books with actual stable PLOTS: check out my account.

𝙴𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚕𝚍 📸 by jammyjess20

...We were so caught up in the shared moment of care free joy to notice the midnight grey Toyota pickup truck speeding directly towards us. Meters before impact dad finally caught on to what was about to happen, despite it being day the approaching vehicle's headlights blinded us as our cars breaks slammed on, the sound of the tires melting away as the rubber tires scraped against the pavement filled the air and the scent of burning rubber overwhelmed my nostrils, despite our efforts the brakes didn't slow us down, we were to late. There was nothing we could do as we collided head on..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Attempt two at writing a book lmao, summaries without spoilers are not my strong point but here you go: After a tragic child hood accident Astra is left utterly alone, forcing her to make a massive move across the states to live in Tennessee with her grandmother. A few years pass and Astra finds it difficult to deal with the trauma she experienced as a young child, but surrounded by friends and throwing herself into education she starts to heal, until she meets Jason. In the beginning Jason was a kind, caring guy who seemed genuinely interested in getting to know Astra, but not everyone is who they seem to be. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TW LIST!!!! (there's alot) swearing, lots PTSD/past trauma Character death Violence/ injury detailing Stalking Kidnapping Depression, anxiety Panic attacks Alcohol and drug usage Over thinking Self harm/sabotage Survivors guilt Potential homophobia Eating disorders If there's anything you think needs to be posted as a TW then let me know, also please don't read if there is anything that triggers you. Some of these topics are personal, don't be afraid to reach out if you need to talk or ask anything :) Also this is my first solo writing project so any feedback positive/negative is appreciated, writing tips for anything too, hope you enjoy. - jammy :) 24/09/24 - ?

Perfect Fate ✔ by fanoshkaflippo

Wattpad Creator! Happy and proud. HIM: Staying the night? Not my thing. Hearts and flowers? Boring. Falling in love? Not anytime soon. Settling down? Off the table. Getting married? You're kidding me, right? That was me before the night we first met. Because, well, meeting a hot chick that made me hard just by looking at her was definitely not in my plans when I sneaked out of a woman's apartment after what was already a long night. Taking her home and getting her a chocolate cake, though, was kind of intentional. But falling for her? Boy, that was pretty much inevitable. HER: He came out of nowhere, literally. I was there, sitting on that bench, barefoot and crying and just getting my heart broken in peace and silence. Then he appeared, all mad and furious and sexy and tall and just drool-worthy! And just like that, despite my poor attempts of escaping him, he had me wrapped in his world. A crazy yet heart-fluttering world, that I have absolutely no intentions of leaving anytime soon. ------- Character development is a main theme in this book. It shows you how they both work on changing for the better, while trying to overcome the obstacles in their relationship and fight for each other till the end. ** Warning!! Some chapters contain sexual scenes, but there's always a warning at the head of the chapter. Do not read them if you're under 18.** * Also, please beware that this story contains a lot of swearing. Read at your own risk. * **I don't own any photos used in this book. All are found on the internet for public use.** Highest Rankings: Sexy - #1 Love - #1 General Fiction - #41 Romance - #46 ------ ** Copyright © 2014 by Fanoshka Flippo (Farah Fekry). All rights reserved. No part of this document may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior written permission of Fanoshka Flippo / Farah Fekry. **

I Fell in Love with a Bad Boy by Beautiful_Tragedy8

CRINGE WARNING! First book I ever wrote on here!! -- "Sometimes the person who you are willing to take a bullet for is the person behind the gun." I stood peering over the cold lifeless body that lay before my eyes. I had always thought of death the enemy, but right now, I blessed it upon the person who is now at peace. Sometimes you don't need to be the smartest, or the fastest, but you do need to be wisest. They say the blood runs deeper than water, and I believe it, because even though the people that we love can turn on us and begin to hate us, they are only human, meaning that soon they will begin to see how short life really is and how it is not to be wasted. People who seem perfect and they look like they have no floors'; they are the people who are suffering, like I was. But I found my savior in the most uncommon place. He was able to look through my mask, he saw the cracks, and tried to fix the broken girl that hid away deep inside the girl who only wanted to be seen as 'fine'. I slowly began to find comfort and safety in him, and I did the same to him. We were two broken people becoming whole. Someone once said when you pass, if you can count your true friends on one hand you are beyond lucky, and I even though I did not like the person that lay before me, I know that he once had true friends, including me. I'm a 17 year old girl who has suffered more than any other, beginning to believe that 'Hope' was just another word the people throw around. Until I fell in love with a badboy. Trailer to the side -------------------> Made By @Laura__1 Cover made by @Beautiful_Tragedy8 Copyright 2014

Personified US States and Federal District by Leonidas13

So this was an idea I've had for a while now concerning the capital and states. I started out with Alaska, then moved to New York and it just snow balled from there. This book will start with Delaware, end with Hawaii and will put D.C. in middle with the rest of states from the 1700s. And if anybody wants to create fan art for them feel free to do it and if you want your art displayed here, I'll make a separate book just for the art. Please be mindful of the fact that these are my ideas on how they all look and act. Before anybody gets on me about Pennsylvania, I've read other stories where Penn is albino and can switch from acting like Prussia to Austria and back again with either a trigger word or song. I've done it so that even though Penn mainly acts like Austria, he will switch to Prussia if AND only when the family is being seriously threatened. The only countries who know about the capital and the states are as follows: 1. Russia, Ukraine, Belarus- reason is because of the purchase of Alaska back in 1867 and that New York decided to follow his grandma to meet this new potential sibling 2. Lithuania- we all know that he lived with Alfred for a time, so he one day literally ran into Alaska and from there meet the 50 of Alfred's children 3. Prussia- two words people VALLEY FORGE, it was not a good winter that year at all 4. Canada and Mexico- Mexico knew already because the states along the southern border are hers (yes, here Mexico is a girl named Esperanza) and Canada found out shortly after the war of 1812 Hope you all enjoy reading the book and as a pre warning, all and any flames will be used to roast marshmallows on bayonets (don't tell Gilbert about that last part) over backyard fire pits.

Altered: Win and Team by cLaRaya0

"I wanted to remind him of the night we cleared things out. He has all the right to fear especially that we're deviating from the norm. But what is really considered normal? Men before us were in this kind of relationship already. The Romans knew about it. What changed that made our situation different from before? Society has a way of being funny. Evolution has a play in this part. Homosapiens eliminated their previous counterparts in fear of extinction. Not knowing that they were the product of the latter. I wondered who spread this way of thinking about same sex relationships. I'm not quiet sure it was religion. Could it be the opposite sex? In fear that reproduction can be halted? Or could it be a propaganda by a corporation who feared that there would be fewer consumers of their product due to our preferences. We can only wonder." -Phawin We know Dean and Pharm had made a promise to live together after both graduates and get married in New York. We know Del and Alex, as well as, Manaow and Pruk got together. But how about Win and Team? What will become of them after? What's their plan? What does the future have in store? Do they have a plan or would they keep on just whinging it. Ever wondered what happened between them? Between us? Let's try and look into the possibilities.. How do you move on? Are you able? Where you able? If you don't want to get hurt, If you don't want to ruin yourself, Even a little further.. Please move on. But if you dare and wanted to know, Then continue. But, remember - I warned you. If you ship Win and Team and waiting for Between Us The Series to come out and Hemp Rope to finish, you may try and take a chance on this alternative universe. Chapters with *bunny ears* are my chapter babies that contains 'easter eggs'. 😉 Leave a star for your favorite chapter and leave some comments that we can gossip about. 🌟 ❤️ Credits to the original owner of the characters. Simply Fan Fiction.

Tiny Texas Time! by hellllllnah

I keep having ideas and they're all about Texas because he's my favorite for no reason other than I just decided that he is Anyway this is more of just a smol thing for chuckles, each chapter will probably only be around 300 words or less, and it's just about Texas being America and Mexico's chaos child (Shh I know there's no reason for this to exist) (Edit: I'm from the future and I lied. This is not smol. It big)

Countryhumans Oneshots [DISCONTINUED] by KiitaExists

🔞this book will (and does) contain a lot of smut!🔞 discontinued 😔 __ im going to hell, arent i? welp too late read the 1st chapter for rules on what certain emojis in chapter titles mean, what i will/wont write, what im working on writing, all that good stuff if you dont like this.. honestly reasonably so, have a nice day if you do like this... enjoye! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･~✧ start: february 13th, 2023 i thiiink end: december 25th 2023 100 reads ✅ february 27th, 2023 500 reads ✅ march 15th, 2023 1,000 reads ✅ march 25th, 2023 2,000 reads ✅ april 11th, 2023 5,000 reads ✅ june 11th, 2023 10,000 reads ✅ october 7th, 2023 15,000 reads ✅️ march 20th, 2024 20,000 reads (im reachin for the stars 😳) HIGH RANKINGS THAT IM PROUD OF (◔◡◔) #3 in #newzealand #61 in #australia #171 in #canada (why are all of these about the siblings lol) content warnings: smut strange topics. very, very strange topics bad writing (in my opinion :') ) degeneracy. im being serious shipping (obviously) possible insensitivity about serious topics its discontinued so no more requests or n e thing

$vanoss crew & Misfitz x male!reader //DISCONTINUED\\ by subdiversion$

Hello lovely's, whelp I've finally found enough courage to do this, also sorry if this is shit it's my first time writing one of these. And I'm making it up as I go. Your brother was having a sleepover with his YouTube friends, little did you know you would be joining them for the fun times. You're a very shy person and rarely speak to anyone except ohm and nogla, you don't trust anyone unless they're close ones, but now your going to have more friends, but you more consider them more like family. The people in this are • vanoss • delirious • wildcat • basically • lui • Nogla • mini • ohm (your brother) • cartoons • moo • smii7y • panda will probably add more people •fitz/Cameron •zuckles/mason •johnontheradio/Toby •swagger/Eric •Mc creamy/jay •kryoz/john •raccooneggs/Ezra {{SLOW UPDATES}} {{discontinued}}

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Slide 1 of 10

Aftermath Plans || Amerus / Rusame cover

𝙴𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚠𝚊��𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚕𝚍 📸 cover

Perfect Fate ✔ cover

I Fell in Love with a Bad Boy cover

Personified US States and Federal District cover

Altered: Win and Team cover

Tiny Texas Time! cover

Countryhumans Oneshots [DISCONTINUED] cover

$vanoss crew & Misfitz x male!reader //DISCONTINUED\\ cover$

Aftermath Plans || Amerus / Rusame

"So what now, our alliance is over?" Russia licked his lips, his eyes were staring at just one point of the wooden desk. He could feel the other man's looks directed to his back, even though he didnt have any irises. Russia knew from experience at this point, how it felt to be watched. "You didn't help with any shit anyway." Russia said in a cold tone, his fingers reaching to grab the cold metallic pen laying close to tidied up documents. He heard America's breathy, hateful chuckle. "Then why-" "But no, it's not." Now he knew he got the other man's attention. He turned his head towards the black eyed man, who had stopped talking to listen to him now. "In fact." He continued. "-it just solidifies now." America hummed, sitting on the table. "Care to explain?" Russia stared at his starless nights with no emotion but plain hatred. "I want my father dead." He saw how wicked America's eyes shined with the declaration, but didn't comment on it. "And it will be quite hard without your help." /// 20.02.20 Slowburn Amerus/Rusame and even slowburner writer but i think i will finish this lmao THE STORY IS NOT EXACTLY HISTORICALLY ACCURATE. I tend to follow the key parts selected from Cold War but there are (mostly) things that made up or amplified to fit better in the story, so keep in mind! dedicated to @YoungerJustice who also drew the cover [ PLEASE READ ] I have Rusame in the title because thats the second ship name. If Russia not being the top is something that puts you off then i am sorry but this is not the book for you. This book will include heavy themes, i did not put +18 for nothing. If you hate it, don't waste your time leaving a hate comment. Just don't read it. I normally wouldn't even put this warning but better be safe than sorry! #1 amerus 23.10.21 #1 americaxrussia 23.10.21 #1 cold war 24.02.23 #1 countryhumansau 13.10.24 Thank you so much.