What I Really Want To Write
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- Votes 7
- Parts 6
Ongoing<5 mins
Last published Sun, Jun 27, 2021
These questions irk me all the time,
Is this what you want to write?
Is this really true?
Are you writing from your heart?
Are forcing on ideas?
What's your goal in writing this?
These are the questions I keep asking myself also called as self doubt. And I know somewhere down there I agree to all these reasonable doubts but this makes me weak. Sometimes in a dilemma whether or not I am forcing myself to write which I do occasionally on topics i am not interested. (thats personal choice right?) But most of the time I like expressing myself through my poems or writing.
I didn't have a writer's block, I simply felt that I was forcing myself to write (for a good-looking portfolio) but now I realise that I was just demotivated and had not a single person ask me why I stopped writing, which means that my readers didn't really enjoy my work or I was simply inconsistent which lead to no readers at all.
Considering all these aspects of my writing journey on wattpad, I am simply planning to write what I really want write unconditionally. After all I love writing for its elegant and romantic nature which gives the actual meaning to the abstract emotions.
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loss
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Sometimes when I say "I'm okay", I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight and say, "I know you're not". I have felt like this many times in my life; as a kid, teenager and as an adult. I have seen many things in my life and felt even more things that has been horribly depressing... But I got up. I stood up to walk on for another day. I dealt with my emotional amnesia the only way I knew I could and that was by writing it out into poetry. I wanted to forget my pain and forget what I was going through. I needed that cut of the blade or a pill to drink to take everything away. My poetry became both my pill and my blade... Now I share the most intimate part of myself with the world. The part of me I kept hidden in the closet. The part I never thought I would ever present to the world. Now is the time I have to stop having amnesia about my emotions. It is time to learn, to better myself and to stand up and remember the things that I shut out like a voluntary amnesia all these years. Those who are offended after reading this - f**k you! If you are sad with me and willing to cut your wrist - I know how you feel! If you just enjoy the words - I love you! #679 in Poetry on 17/03/2018 #779 in Poetry on 18/03/2018 #807 in Poetry on 19/03/2018 #474 in Poetry on 22/03/2018
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