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Absolutely ridiculous pickup lines

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Reads 46
Votes 1
Parts 1
Time <5 mins

Reads 46
Votes 1
Parts 1
Time <5 mins

negativecreep__

honestlyreadthismya myaaaaaa myareadthis plsmyaread readthismya

Girl, my love for you is like Diarreah, I just can't hold it in.

 Girl, did you have Lucky Charms for breakfast? Cause you look magically delicious.

Girl, are you a parking ticket? Cause you   have got FINE written all over you.

Girl, do you have any raisins? No? How about a Date?

Girl, if you were a laser, you'd be set on stunning.

Girl, you're like a fat stump.  I'm falling all over you.

Girl, if you were a fruit, you'd be a FINEapple.

Girl, are you my appendix? Cause I don't understand you but this feeling in my stomach wants me to take you out.

Girl, do you like Bacon? Wanna strip?

Girl, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Girl, want to test the spring constant of my mattress?

 Girl, let's convert our potential energy into kinectic energy.

Girl, that dress would look better accelerating towards the floor at 9.8  m/s/s

Girl, you must be made of beryllium and barium because you're a total BaBe.All Rights Reserved

honestlyreadthismya myaaaaaa myareadthis plsmyaread readthismya

Table of contents

Random pickuplines
Thu, Nov 27, 2014

1 part

Random pickuplines
Thu, Nov 27, 2014

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Hannah by lovelycrowsong

Hannah And her Happy Harem After spending her entire life training to become an Olympic level gymnast only to suffer one too many injuries for her body to stay competitive in the sport she loved. Hannah finds herself in deep financial trouble. With few marketable skills outside the gym. To pay the bills and help her family, Hannah comes up with a creative, exotic side business. She got a little carried away being creative with the business aspect though and might be in over her head. Everything had been going fine. No one had noticed what she was doing, her business was doing great. She was able to take care of herself and her father comfortably. That is until her latest performance circuit. She had finally booked some big shows, a top tier set at Red, a night performing at a new drag cabaret bar, and finally a private show for an international company. It was supposed to be another long weekend of working two jobs at once. Just like all the other ones she had suffered through the past three years. Except on this trip, irresistible men keep finding her, and she can't find it in herself to resist. One after another, Hannah finds men she can't stop thinking about, men who feel like they are a part of her. Men who know how to pleasure her in ways she had no idea she needed. Men who have more than a few confessions to make to her when the time is right. Enjoy trailing behind Hannah through a whirlwind, steamy romance. Smut warning of highest order. It is reverse harem after all. Girl is going to get it good friends.

Lesbian One Shots by angelinajolieswifee

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CHEMISTRY| 16+ by estaronnie

Sometimes, when you meet someone, you just click. I don't believe in love at first sight, but I believe in the click. She knew nothing about Chemistry, it was always just a plain hard subject that she hated. But with his help, she realised that, perhaps there was a side to Chemistry that she liked. As they say, experience is the best teacher... "What is Chemistry?" "Chemistry is you touching my mind and it setting my body on fire" We have calcium in our bones, iron in our veins, carbon in our souls and nitrogen in our brains, 93 percent stardust with souls made of flames. We're just stars that have names. Warning: I would not tolerate any form of copyright on this book. This is all my hardwork and I won't be happy if anyone stole, either my characters or my story.

What Is This Feeling Inside? by NoireEtRouge

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I wished for a Boyfriend not a Girlfriend (GxG, Lesbian) °editing° by FallinginReverze

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Life: A journey towards self love or....... self hatred by Apulu14

Poems are a great help to depression. My cover is not be very appealing and my title seems boring. Poems are also not liked by people very much and is considered boring. I may not get many views. But in the end "Don't judge a book by it's cover" only wins. So I have bought you some sad poems, food related ones, poems related to the things I love, Love yourself, Romantic and many more. These are written by me and please don't post it anywhere without my permission. To explain you why I have added a pink heart with black background, it is because the poems tell a story of girl(me) to whom people think she is very cold, straight forward, rude and all those things but... in reality she is too soft for this harsh world. The pink heart represents the softness she is hiding inside using her black side so no one would misuse her. The angel in her still haven't faded after getting betrayed, lost, depressed, fake people, bully and many more. She doesn't wants to go through this again. The pink background in the upper half tell that she still have hopes in her life. I want the readers to know the deep meaning behind the Title themselves and I won't reveal it until the end of the book. Keep your guesses up and think what possibly could be the meaning of this unusual title. Thank you and enjoy the journey of this little girl warning: if you are expecting this to be a story then sorry it isn't a story but a collection of poems written by the "little girl" depending on her mood that time. It is more like a Journey. You could skip it if you want to. Or learn about the little girl I'm representing/my life. Credits- I don't own the pictures used here however some are mine most are from other websites and I give their credits to them.

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Slide 1 of 10

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Hannah

Hannah And her Happy Harem After spending her entire life training to become an Olympic level gymnast only to suffer one too many injuries for her body to stay competitive in the sport she loved. Hannah finds herself in deep financial trouble. With few marketable skills outside the gym. To pay the bills and help her family, Hannah comes up with a creative, exotic side business. She got a little carried away being creative with the business aspect though and might be in over her head. Everything had been going fine. No one had noticed what she was doing, her business was doing great. She was able to take care of herself and her father comfortably. That is until her latest performance circuit. She had finally booked some big shows, a top tier set at Red, a night performing at a new drag cabaret bar, and finally a private show for an international company. It was supposed to be another long weekend of working two jobs at once. Just like all the other ones she had suffered through the past three years. Except on this trip, irresistible men keep finding her, and she can't find it in herself to resist. One after another, Hannah finds men she can't stop thinking about, men who feel like they are a part of her. Men who know how to pleasure her in ways she had no idea she needed. Men who have more than a few confessions to make to her when the time is right. Enjoy trailing behind Hannah through a whirlwind, steamy romance. Smut warning of highest order. It is reverse harem after all. Girl is going to get it good friends.