INSIDE THE MIND- why i DID what i DID
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  • Parts 1
  • Time <5 mins
  • Reads 11
  • Votes 0
  • Parts 1
  • Time <5 mins
Ongoing, First published Jun 22, 2021
WARNING: DO NOT READ IF YOU WILL GET TRIGGERED BY MENTAL ILLNESS 

im kind of bored cuz its the summer so ill try to update as soon as possible.

a young girl writes about her "friends" before she kills herself. She explains how the different illnesses ruined her life. She explains how abuse led to the creation of these friends.
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Have you ever met someone who alters the course of your life? For good or for bad, they've come in, given and taken, and then- BOOM! Your life was never the same. There's always a change, an altering of reality. When you meet those people, the reality that you've known your whole life is suddenly gone and a new one has taken its place. When those moments happen, there's no going back. You can try to return to the way things were but nothing, and I mean nothing, can take you back to exactly how it was. That's what happened to us. I think that's why we're still trying so desperately to get back to some sort of normalcy. Four years later and we're still on the ground, crawling, in search of the happiness that was lost that June. Summers will never be the same. Midnight walks through my neighborhood will never be the same. Field parties with bonfires and loud music will never be the same. I still don't know why you left and what lead you to the decision you made. What I do know is that we're here. We're alive and we're pushing forward to the future. A future that you're not a part of. But in some ways, I'm glad you're not a part of it. I just wish it wasn't like this. *** TRIGGER WARNING*** SA, abuse, suicide, substance abuse, and mental illness. This is a complete story that is much like life; fast, full of surprises, and not always how we want it to be. This has been a project of mine for over three years. It was self-published on Amazon, but after some issues in publication, I decided to just upload it on here. I hope you fall in love with these characters like I have. The friends in this story are trying to make names for themselves, figure out who they are, who they can trust, how to love, and how to separate themselves from a restrictive community. As in any coming of age story, they will experience growing pains... but will they survive them before its too late? PLEASE READ THE TRIGGER WARNINGS.
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Dazai angst I felt like writing ACTUAL WRITING WILL BE POSTED BY APRIL 30TH !PLEASE MIND THE TW'S THIS IS INCREDIBLY HEAVY! Child endangerment Child abuse Hypothermia Starvation/Descriptions of intense hunger Suicidal thoughts/Ideation Implications of non consensual medical drug usage Self harm Blood Gun/Blades Thoughts/Urges to hurt others (?) Dehumanization Depression Self neglect Suicide/Attempt (VERY descriptive) Panic attack descriptions Slight religious imagery (?) Descriptions of gore/injury Brief mention of torture Law breaking/reckless driving (?) Emotional suppression (?) Drastic mood swings/changes Mentioned character death Playlist on first part and taking suggestions