Diamond in the rough

Love is a strange thing. People say that love is a
waste of time, that it doesn't exist. I have never experienced love before, so
I just go by what other people say. My caseworker, Joclyn Miles, tells me not
to listen to anybody when they talk about love. She says the world is "damaging
the minds of the youth". Although, my fourteenth foster mom always talked about
love, in a very, very, very positive way. She said that she had always wanted a
child to love. She wanted to tuck her in at night, comb her hair, read her
books and everything a mother does for a child. Unfortunately, she hated me
because I'm sixteen and apparently I'm too old. I've been moving from foster
home to foster home ever since I was two, because nobody wanted me, nobody
loved me. Now I'm living with Joclyn until she finds a home for me. I really
like living with her, although she doesn't love me I don't think, at least I
get a roof over my head, food to eat, and a bed to sleep on. School, is another
story subject.  People at school bully
me, stare at me, and even gag when I'm around. I've been pushed against my
locker so hard one time that I had to miss school, because I could barely move.
When my caseworker asked me what happened, I just told that I ran into a pole. I
never tell Joclyn about the people who people who bully me at school, she would
tell the principal. Then, the principal would make this huge speech about
bullying and everyone would know it would know it would be about me. Joclyn got
me a therapist, three to be exact. I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder and
depression, and bipolar disorder. It's been hard, because I have been having
anxiety attacks at school, and thoughts of suicide too. There is only one word
to describe these disorders: scary.