This is pure crack, read at your own risk

In which Mikey Way, Patrick Stump, Ray Toro, a cow pencil sharpener known a Mr. Moo Moo, a red pen known as The Red Pen, a bunch of geckos, and two nerds with nothing better to do team up to murder people... and hopefully take over the world in the process. But there is something standing in their way: Pete Wentz, a world-famous detective, who has made it his mission in life to find them --and destroy them.

You can blame @gutpunchbreathless for giving me the idea to write this