Story cover for Thoughts When Alone by AkanbiFavour
Thoughts When Alone
  • WpView
    Reads 393
  • WpVote
    Votes 78
  • WpPart
    Parts 27
  • WpHistory
    Time 15m
  • WpView
    Reads 393
  • WpVote
    Votes 78
  • WpPart
    Parts 27
  • WpHistory
    Time 15m
Ongoing, First published Aug 18, 2021
Mature
At 11pm one night, she thought....why not make a book and name it 'thoughts when alone'? and she did. 

might update once a day or twice depending on how moody I am.

Note: everything will not be about me....it's thoughts of many others as well so don't come to my DM sympathising with me imma just go off on you.
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Release by FeelMyBreath
191 parts Complete Mature
This is a collection of my writing from the past 7 years. Before I started to write, I was a very lost individual, as are most teens, but I was lost in darkness. I was too afraid to move anywhere at all. I hid in the dark, debilitated by my own anxiety, sadnesses, anger, and hopelessness. I was desperate to be loved and feared it the most, I was a coward, I was self-destructive, I would mentally bend my thoughts to the point of bordering insanity. I was born into this world alone, and got too comfortable with it. Maybe I still am, but a fraction of what I used to be. This writing is extremely vulnerable, and potentially disturbing to others, as all my weaknesses, strengths, obsessions with making every moment sentimental, the sickening desperation I've had, the destructiveness, and the constant brutal reconstruction of my mind. Without guidance, it's been absolute intense chaos. Though, there is beauty in the darkness. Everything can be found in the darkness. You'll find that through my writing, I've somehow slowly become exactly what I've written. A living representation of my writing and what I wanted to be. Without myself even knowing it. A lot of my writing themes are based around nature, or some kind of natural aspect. The imagery I paint with natural metaphors is constant, the animals, just like you and I, the plants, and all other living things. I planted these seeds in my mind, unknowingly at the time, where I now feel the deep dark green jungle pressing at the inner walls of my skull. It's all that I want to consume my mind. There's so much to learn. The magic of nature, and it's infinite wisdom. It's as if I have been on this path all along, and I didn't even know what I was doing, yet my body and mind were passively taking care of me. Giving me and eventually showing exactly what I want, and wanted to become. I have every moment, every instance of suffering, and every epiphany to be thankful for. Soon, I'll be at peace from the raging storm.
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This diary consists of short 1 month period. The girl, Emma confides in her feelings, her thoughts, her day and her tragedies. There are going to be twists and a really sad ending. Live this one month with Emma. Understand the kind of woman she is. "It's 1st of December, 2012. I received this thick black spiraled diary as a gift from my late mother. She always said that this diary would show me more patience than people and I should write my heart out when there's no one special enough to listen... to confide in. It was my 12th birthday. I'm 16 now and guess what? I really don't have anyone to share my crazy thoughts or stupid feelings. If I ever start doing it... People would assume me mentally sick and tie me to a chair and start stuffing me with aspirins and sedatives. And that's definitely not the way I want to go down. So, I'm just starting to write in this diary until and unless I find that special one to share everything and nothing with."