Happy Utopia Day, Joe McCarthy - JT Lundy - Wattpad

Happy Utopia Day, Joe McCarthy

Reads 6,361
Votes 238
Parts 30
Time 7h 0m

Reads 6,361
Votes 238
Parts 30
Time 7h 0m

action adventure comedy espionage humor political satire spy thriller wattys2015

A xenophobic, alt-right wing advisor controls an unstable United States president. Through executive orders they utilize torture, censor the press, and construct monolithic border walls across Mexico and Canada. Only an unlikely hero can save the American people from complete totalitarianism.

2014 Thurber Prize for American Humor Semi-Finalist
2014 Reader's Favorite Silver Award Winner - Humor
2013 IndieFab Bronze Award Winner - Thriller and Suspense
2013 BOTYA - Foreword Book of the Year Finalist - Action and Adventure

Chris Thompson thought his youthful dreams of being a secret agent had long ago been put to rest. He has a wife and child, a stable job with the US Customs Department, and--aside from a minor incident involving outsourcing American apple pie production to Bangladesh--no real worries.This all changes when Chris receives a phone call from the president of the United States, Oscar I. Wright, regarding a secret invasion of America from Canada and Mexico--an invasion somehow tied to the ''Big Mac Party,'' a cultish political party that worships the legacy of the notorious Communist-hunting Senator Joseph McCarthy. Soon, Chris is equipped with firearms, designer suits, government helicopters, and an array of gadgets worthy of any top-notch spy. His mission: infiltrate the mysterious ''Emergence'' program founded by McCarthy within the shadowy halls of the US government--and, ultimately, save democracy as we know it from the xenophobic demons of America's past.

A unique, bubbling combination of Christopher Buckley-esque satire, political farce, and espionage comedy, Happy Utopia Day, Joe McCarthy reveals--through encounters with a hilarious cast of hallucinating politicians, Border Patrol commandants, crew-cut torturers, stuttering computer wizards, supposedly immortal pilots, and more--just how frightening a contemporary abuse of government power can be.All Rights Reserved

action adventure comedy espionage humor political satire spy thriller wattys2015

30 parts

Sign up to add Happy Utopia Day, Joe McCarthy to your library and receive updates

or

Content Guidelines

You may also like

Employed Epoch Of Alex Brook | Book 1| Humor-Romance (Completed) by vineethereader

"So, let me get this straight. You stomped all over his paperwork?" She started. "Not intentionally, but yes," I confirmed it. "Threw a drink in his face?" She added. "Expensive red wine." I described. "Rammed into his car with yours deliberately?" she counted on her third finger. "Um...I'm not proud of that one," I said cringing. "And called him offensive names?" She ended the list and I winced. "Twice." I specified. "And you're still alive?" She blinked, looking genuinely surprised. "Geez, don't be dramatic or anything..." I frowned at her hyperbolic statement. "Maybe he's keeping you around to get revenge." She suggested. Possible. I wouldn't put it past him. "I didn't know alright!" I exclaimed. "Let's hope that excuse is acceptable.." She was merely amused. "Working with my new boss is going to be a piece of work." ** Synopsis: When the CEO of Signature Heights: Jensen Black, and a stubborn employee: Alexandra Brook, clash, it's a battle of wits & a war of perseverance. They are both dead set on making each other's lives hell, but when the story progresses they just might learn that first impressions could be deceiving. As circumstances reveal their true selves and opinions change, things could get complicated especially when suddenly feelings get involved. Who would be the first to concede? Maybe it's not that simple to forgive your archnemesis and maybe it'll result in some hilarious consequences... ** Book 1 of a two-part series (completed).High Rankings: # Funny, # Humor, # Comedy, # Romance, #Billionaire Amazing book, I adore your writing style, and I really enjoyed these characters and story -Reader Fantastic story, believably flawed characters and deft humour makes for a very engaging read, I could barely put it down to feed my children -Reader **

Time Will Tell [Complete] by Adios39

In 1842, a 17-year-old runaway flees to Ireland to escape her power-hungry brother and is thrust into a catastrophic series of events that may end in life... or death. Back in the 1600's, two brothers created an intricate system to send coded messages through clocks . . . some big, some small, all equally as important. Nicknamed 'Donovan' and 'MNT', these brothers were as close as could be . . . until one little mistake on Donovan's side rips them apart and turns MNT bitter. Now, almost two centuries later, Lizzy Mason is running for her life in London, never staying in one place too long for fear of discovery. Her brother wants something she has and will stop at nothing to get it. Lizzy feels trapped - there is betrayal and danger at every corner, and she doesn't know how to get out. She runs to Ireland, dragging some of the few people she trusts with her, but Lizzy ends up putting herself and her friends even closer to danger. All she wants is a place to rest, but she doesn't know where to find it - and she will risk everything she has to get there. She thinks she already lost everything. Little does Lizzy know that she has much more to lose, and she might just give it all away. What will she risk to discover what she's been trying to find ever since her parents were killed all those years ago in Germany? And is she willing to die just to win?

The Honeybee Conspiracy by sivapramod

Synopsis In the best interests of the security of the nation, all methods are acceptable, no matter how dirty. It is not a coincidence when a Singapore airline with 315 passengers is shot down over the Carpathian mountains and crashes into the Black Sea in Ukraine killing Roger Brandt, the CIA station head in charge of the Asian Desk and Omar Qureshi, an Iranian scientist. When the charismatic United National Party leader Surender Yogi wins the Indian general elections by a landslide, he never knew what it would take to ensure they govern the largest democracy in the world. Shyam Prasad was just a jungle resort manager in Masinagudi struggling against all odds stacked against him in his quest to find a better meaning to his already messed up life. John Kuruvilla, head of the elite Anti Terror Wing at RAW pushes his nerve to the limits in his unending search to unearth the Honeybee Conspiracy. Shirley Abraham, a top-ranking professional assassin is paid millions of dollars to kill the wife of an Indian political leader, however oblivious to the fact that this very act would put her beloved lover's life at stake. Major Yun Pen Osakiro never realized that the huge cache of gold bars he stole from the sunken Japanese ships and buried safely under the Arabian Sea in the Andaman Islands would be retrieved after 73 years and used for secret covert operations. Have they all been manipulated to play their part in The Honeybee Conspiracy? A gripping novel that takes you across the country and beyond from Pakistan, Iran, Srilanka, Afghanistan, Istanbul , Thailand, Norway, Brussels, Somalia to the Zambezi River in Zimbabwe, bringing together different people from diverse regions of the world all coming together to unravel a sinister, deadly and riveting conspiracy , a conspiracy that will destroy the very fabric of our country. Will John Kuruvilla unfold the Honeybee Conspiracy or will Honeybee ultimately succeed?

Property of the Mafia by MintSprinkles

Linette Cyan did not expect to give up her ordinary nineteen year-old life as wedding dowry in an arranged marriage. Engaged to a charismatic and compelling man who seeks rebellion against his powerful father, Linette finds herself plummeting into the same bloodbath of mystery as her vengeful fiancé. She soon discovers that she, too, is a key piece in a dangerous game of greed between rival families. Passion, tragedy, deceit, and murder become common occurrences in the perilous life of the unlikely couple. But how much are they willing to sacrifice for justice to prevail? Will they conquer their inner demons and find closure to a century-long mystery? This series is split into two parts: PART 1 | Tresora Arc : Chapters 1 - 28 PART 2 | Noir Arc : Chapters 29-45 + Epilogue Completed October 2015. ACHIEVEMENTS (thank you lovelies!) : Awarded "One of the Most Read Stories in 2014". #2 in Action. ___ Old description: Recipe for 1 Linette Cyan: 1) Your dad is a notorious Mafia boss' right hand man. 2) Your family has a million dollar debt. 3) You become compensation through engagement to said Mafia boss' son. 4) You have (and are) a key to an ancient treasure vault being hunted down by opposing Mafia families. 5) Become a witness to murder, illegal drug operations, and treason. Repeat. 6) Engage repeatedly in gunfights and be kidnapped and held hostage on numerous occasions. 7) Learn that your best friend from high school is also a mobster. 8) Be able to fit inside a box containing illegal drugs. 9) Have a crazy madman want you dead. 10) Be able to run for your life in heels, and have a tazer with you 24/7. Seriously.

World Wall 3 by RoshGupta

In the near future, Mr. Donald J. Trump is the President of the United States of America, and there have been some radical changes. Some for the better, and some for the worse. Some are just plain weird. Most notably, however, a giant wall exists at the border of Mexico and the U.S. to stop illegal immigration in Trump's ideology. That's all great, but when Ramon Juarez, a Mexican-American man who immigrated to America years before is caught in the middle of a family crisis that presents certain legal problems in this new, outlandish world, he'll have to break some laws and team up with a couple of dorks to save the day. Inspired by the Trump Craze of the recent months, this is a political comedy, intended to be as uncompromisingly funny as humanly possible. I'm in ninth grade and, at 33 pages long, this is my first story ever. I originally wrote it for the holidays late last year on Google Docs, but my family, friends, and peers loved it, so I figured I'd share it online. Enjoy! NOTICE: This story is labeled as not mature, but it does contain a few suggestive references and mild expletives, so make of it what you may.

Anarchy of the Mice by jeff_bond

"Nibble, nibble. Until the whole sick scam rots through." When anarchist-hackers the Blind Mice begin crippling the country's worst corporations -- the "Despicable Dozen" -- with web and software attacks, the public yawns. When they blip the power grid and penetrate municipal databases? Annoying but hardly a crisis. What about murdered executives? And what if the data disappeared for stock and account balances, property lines, personal ID records ... and never came back? ---- Molly McGill is fighting it. Her teenage son has come downstairs in a T-shirt from these "hacktivists" dominating the news. Her daughter's bus is canceled -- too many stoplights out -- and school is in the opposite direction of the temp job she's supposed to be starting this morning. She is divorced; her P.I. business went belly-up; seriously, what kind of life is this for a woman a mere twelve credit-hours shy of her PhD? Then the doorbell rings. It's Quaid Rafferty, the disgraced (but handsome) ex-governor of Massachusetts, and his partner Durwood Oak Jones, the preeminent small-force private-arms contractors in the Western world. The guys have an assignment for Molly. It's risky, but the pay sure beats switchboard work. They need her to infiltrate the Blind Mice. Danger, intrigue, action for miles and even a whiff of romance. Whatever you read, Anarchy of the Mice is coming for you. cover by Ethan Scott

Perfect Fate ✔ by fanoshkaflippo

Wattpad Creator! Happy and proud. HIM: Staying the night? Not my thing. Hearts and flowers? Boring. Falling in love? Not anytime soon. Settling down? Off the table. Getting married? You're kidding me, right? That was me before the night we first met. Because, well, meeting a hot chick that made me hard just by looking at her was definitely not in my plans when I sneaked out of a woman's apartment after what was already a long night. Taking her home and getting her a chocolate cake, though, was kind of intentional. But falling for her? Boy, that was pretty much inevitable. HER: He came out of nowhere, literally. I was there, sitting on that bench, barefoot and crying and just getting my heart broken in peace and silence. Then he appeared, all mad and furious and sexy and tall and just drool-worthy! And just like that, despite my poor attempts of escaping him, he had me wrapped in his world. A crazy yet heart-fluttering world, that I have absolutely no intentions of leaving anytime soon. ------- Character development is a main theme in this book. It shows you how they both work on changing for the better, while trying to overcome the obstacles in their relationship and fight for each other till the end. ** Warning!! Some chapters contain sexual scenes, but there's always a warning at the head of the chapter. Do not read them if you're under 18.** * Also, please beware that this story contains a lot of swearing. Read at your own risk. * **I don't own any photos used in this book. All are found on the internet for public use.** Highest Rankings: Sexy - #1 Love - #1 General Fiction - #41 Romance - #46 ------ ** Copyright © 2014 by Fanoshka Flippo (Farah Fekry). All rights reserved. No part of this document may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior written permission of Fanoshka Flippo / Farah Fekry. **

The Girl with the Butterfly Tattoo by storyoftheyearxo

"I'm not so naive, my sorry eyes can see." If only those sorry eyes could see behind the impenetratable walls of the CAC. You could say they're like the CIA, FBI, DIA or any other organization that focuses on enforcing national security to America. Except it's the exact opposite. The agencies are all going in the direction; wrong leads, wrong evidence. I guess you can only know what's truly happening when you're right in the middle of the fraudelent operation. Sean Ramerez only wanted to assist the woman being kidnapped but only found himself being drugged, kidnapped and in the middle of prison escapees' plotting America's destruction. The CAC's goal: Bring the population down, ruin the government. With enough skilled escapees, relentless assassins and a well thought stratedy, Sean and this mystery woman only have two choices; Work along side the CAC tight-lipped or die. Either way, mouths are going to be sealed. With Sean's freedom stained crimson, can he still work through the thousands of dangerous men who aim to kill? "What do I have to lose, anyway? Oh, only America's one chance of you know, NOT being annihilated."

Inglorious Impostor Presents: The Astonisher's Return by sufman456

The following content is designed for a tolerant, but not limited to a knowledgeable audience. Reader's discretion is advised: Rob, a reluctant yet hesitant criminal, is the one who you can trust to get an odd job done; he's street smart. Diligently making a name and gradually developing a reputation for himself in Liberty City; Rob finds himself entangled in a drug heist gone wrong, thus forcing him to surrender and get apprehended for smuggling narcotics. While doing his time in prison and hoping to make up for his past, Rob decides to create a list of the people he should target whilst starting off with a clean slate upon his release. He then discovers that there are major flaws in his plan. Welcome to heartbreak: a story of internal struggle and painstaking seriousness with subtle hilarity. A series of daring yet meticulously ambitious heists set amidst the backdrop of one of many egregiously corrupted cities that just might set him, and 2 other very unique individuals, up for life. Delve into the enthralling, inglorious experience of 3 very conflicted people... What the Critics had to Say: "Captivating," The American Diet "Invigorating," Walter White "Fulfilling," Chris 'GD' Christie "This time, he's fighting for his life," Rambo Stallone. "Inspiring and calm," Morgan Freeman "The truth is out there. Does anyone happen to know what anal probing is?" Chris Carter "Your top rated source for ever-evolving, slightly altered... news if you will," manipulative/fake Fox News & ... Friends? "So why is it that I'm writing for free online? Ad revenue, a voice for the people, copyright, or impossible popularity?" a writer "This is the real deal: frequently being on the road; missing my wife. Luckily, this book acts as a replacement and a dominant Dubs win," Warriors bandwagon fans & Globetrotters. *A/N- Be sure to tune in every weekend, or repeatedly read the same long a** chapter.

30 Days Ultimatum(COMPLETED)[✔] by strawberrytrifles

This book is a RomCom book(Romance comedy). Read if you love laughing.😊 CURRENTLY EDITING AND WORKING ON RE-WRITING. PLEASE IGNORE SOME IMMATURE THINGS THAT THE CHARACTERS EXHIBIT. I'LL BE RE-WRITING THE BOOK AS SOON AS SCHOOL STRESS REDUCES A TAD BIT. Mia Montana has always had the fantasy of a perfect ever after. She believes she can find that in Dayne Matthews her current boyfriend. He is just that perfect person. It's him or no other. Jason Steele New York's most eligible billionaire bachelor. He is every ladies dream. But the problem is, he isn't looking for a long term commitment. Being a product of a failed marriage he believes love doesn't exist. Jason and Mia's grandfathers are best friends. When Mia's grandpa suffers from a mild heart attack, he realizes that there isn't much time left. But he has a wish, to see his grand daughter walk down the aisle. The problem is; he thinks Dayne isn't that man. He arranges with his best friend to match-make their grand children on the pretext of merging their companies. Jason and Mia refuse to compromise. So they strike a deal with them. "You both will live together for 30 days, if you don't fall in love with each other within those 30 days. You both can go your separate ways and marry whoever you want to marry". Found in between the devil and the blue sea, they both agree. Mia feels she is in love with someone already, so loving Jason will be totally impossible. But life isn't how it seems like always. They are yet to discover love isn't a matter of choice but a matter of the heart. Disclaimer- I know that this book has lots of plot holes, and all that. Trust me when I say I'm definitely working on it. I haven't fully gotten around editing it 'cause how busy life is at the moment. Note that, this book is my first book ever as a writer and as such has stuff that needs to be worked on. If you want to read a really thought out work, you can read my other books. I do hope you all understand.

You may also like

Slide 1 of 10

Employed Epoch Of Alex Brook | Book 1| Humor-Romance (Completed) cover

Time Will Tell [Complete] cover

The Honeybee Conspiracy cover

Property of the Mafia cover

World Wall 3 cover

Anarchy of the Mice cover

Perfect Fate ✔ cover

The Girl with the Butterfly Tattoo cover

Inglorious Impostor Presents: The Astonisher's Return cover

30 Days Ultimatum(COMPLETED)[✔] cover

Employed Epoch Of Alex Brook | Book 1| Humor-Romance (Completed)

"So, let me get this straight. You stomped all over his paperwork?" She started. "Not intentionally, but yes," I confirmed it. "Threw a drink in his face?" She added. "Expensive red wine." I described. "Rammed into his car with yours deliberately?" she counted on her third finger. "Um...I'm not proud of that one," I said cringing. "And called him offensive names?" She ended the list and I winced. "Twice." I specified. "And you're still alive?" She blinked, looking genuinely surprised. "Geez, don't be dramatic or anything..." I frowned at her hyperbolic statement. "Maybe he's keeping you around to get revenge." She suggested. Possible. I wouldn't put it past him. "I didn't know alright!" I exclaimed. "Let's hope that excuse is acceptable.." She was merely amused. "Working with my new boss is going to be a piece of work." Synopsis: When the CEO of Signature Heights: Jensen Black, and a stubborn employee: Alexandra Brook, clash, it's a battle of wits & a war of perseverance. They are both dead set on making each other's lives hell, but when the story progresses they just might learn that first impressions could be deceiving. As circumstances reveal their true selves and opinions change, things could get complicated especially when suddenly feelings get involved. Who would be the first to concede? Maybe it's not that simple to forgive your archnemesis and maybe it'll result in some hilarious consequences... Book 1 of a two-part series (completed).High Rankings: # Funny, # Humor, # Comedy, # Romance, #Billionaire Amazing book, I adore your writing style, and I really enjoyed these characters and story -Reader Fantastic story, believably flawed characters and deft humour makes for a very engaging read, I could barely put it down to feed my children -Reader **