Jokes and Puns. - wyvern - Wattpad

Jokes and Puns.

LECTURAS 78,231
Votos 1,387
Partes 112
Hora 13m

LECTURAS 78,231
Votos 1,387
Partes 112
Hora 13m

cheesypickuplinestoo funny ironic jokes pleaseread puns wattys2015

Um. Stupid stuff.
As well as Cheesy Pickup LinesTodos los derechos reservados

cheesypickuplinestoo funny ironic jokes pleaseread puns wattys2015

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My Fake Boyfriend de ToTheExtreme95

He was so close, his breath hit my lips. His eyes darted from my eyes to my lips. I stared intently, awaiting his next move. His lips fell near my ear. "Shut up and kiss me" He whispered roughly. A chill shot up my spine. I pulled back, staring at his eyes and leaned in.. ********** What happens when Alexis Dawson- "residential loser" of Redwood High, agrees to help Redwood High's player, Aaron Walker. How can she stop herself from falling for him? But it isn't all love and romance, Alexis has her own secret. Join them on the journey filled with jealousy, betrayal, trust, friendship and love. A little favour just got a whole lot more complicated.

My Billionaire Master: How I Ended Up Marrying A Disabled CEO de Sandhya_sss

"Will you marry my Disabled son?" "Oh! Fuck No! I am a straight guy, I cant marry another man" "I will pay you 10 million dollars for it💰💰💲" "Do you want me to wear a Lehanga or saree at my wedding?" It was a simple choice for Ishan, a financially struggling guy in his 20s burdened with family responsibilities. He would do anything to be rich.. Even sacrifice his sexuality and masculinity in the process. Check my new story where our protagonist takes some wild ride to earn money.

𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 • 𝐤𝐭𝐡 + 𝐜𝐛𝐠 de fairytyun

"My friends won't love me like you." + a taegyu short story + angst

Dandy's World Gc🌼🌈 de Ur_L0calSolarballfan

This is the Dandy's World Gc!! I decided to make one cuz yes I may not upload stories often but I'll try my best to upload! Am I the first one to make this? Cover art by me!! :D

[2] The Whole Family Is Insanely Eavesdropping on My Thoughts de iwantx

Lu Chao Chao found herself transported into the pages of a novel. In this story, she was cast as a disposable character, doomed to be killed at birth, with her place in the narrative usurped by the story's heroine. This heroine, under the guise of moral virtue, accuses her adoptive mother and grandfather of betraying their country, which results in the extermination of her entire lineage. Following this, she reclaims her birth mother and, alongside her ineffectual father, manages to dodge any culpability, leading a blissful existence thereafter. Thus, only Lu Chao Chao's family ends up as mere footnotes in the heroine's path. Observing her mother, who has been subjected to years of emotional manipulation, Lu Chao Chao reveals a painful truth: ["Mother, the love of your life is currently awaiting his concubine's childbirth."]. This revelation jolts her infatuated mother to reality. Turning her attention to her physically challenged elder brother, she laments ["Big brother, you have endured unspeakable humiliation and suffering. But fear not, for I have the means to cure your affliction!"]. Remarkably, her brother then goes on to surpass every contender in the capital, achieving unrivaled greatness. To her second brother, she unveils a harsh truth ["You have misplaced your trust. Your so-called best friend is nothing but the illegitimate offspring of our despicable father."]. And to her third brother, she points out his deliberate downfall ["You were purposefully led astray, left ignorant, succumbed to gambling, and found yourself in dire straits."]. In her candidness, Lu Chao Chao watches as her family overturns their doomed fates. The detestable man is cast aside, and her three brothers rise to become paragons of virtue and success. Even she, merely an infant with a feeding bottle, becomes the darling of the entire world. 📌 Story and translation are not mine, all credit goes to the real owner. For offline reading only.

Ghost Sweepers The XXX that only I can understand de Arlomadder

Salutation! I'm Arlo Madder who is a storyteller who travel between worlds and worlds to tell tales of the unknown. I have came to Earth to fulfill my wish to tell stories. It is my greatest pleasure to meet all of you. The story in this website illustrates a young boy named Alfie Rivas, who has the ability to see ghosts. Because of this talent, he suffers from a tragic life of being bullied at school and experiencing domestic violence at home. Despite the fact that he encounters difficulty in living, his friend Jay was always there to comfort him and stand by his side. However, due to his bad luck, supernatural things start to appear in his school. Broken windows, lights turning on and off and creepy black hands. These things create terror and panic to every student, teachers and staff in Sacred Diamond primary and secondary school. Alfie and Jay even got suspected as being the master criminal of causing these events by a strong ghost sweeper. Can Alfie and Jay prove their innocence, defeat the ghost sweeper and discover the true ghost who is behind the scenes? Look at this Book immediately and hear the answers.

Flames Like Vines de sararaasch

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a companion story to ICE LIKE FIRE, the sequel to SNOW LIKE ASHES. I say "companion" as it parallels the beginning events of ICE LIKE FIRE -- and as such, you will find a few minor spoilers for ICE LIKE FIRE. If you are the sort of reader who screeches in horror at the thought of a spoiler of any kind, LOOK AWAY NOW. But if you are the sort of reader who flips through the pages of a book, perusing lines here and there before you've quite finished it yet...well, read on, dear rebel reader. Read on. *** SUMMARY: "She was part of Summer, and Summer was part of her, and this land wouldn't abandon her too." Ceridwen Preben, princess of Summer, has spent her life plotting against her brother, Simon, the Summerian king. Simon has embraced the ruling family's reputation for using their conduit to keep their subjects in a state of bliss, and has spent his reign slowly driving Summer into ruin, filling everyone with carelessness and letting them turn a blind eye to Summer's rampant -- and deadly -- slave trade. But Ceridwen refuses to let her kingdom disintegrate, and with the help of her fellow rebel-in-arms, Lekan, she hopes to undo Simon's lethal dealings. But when Ceridwen uncovers Simon's deadliest plot yet, she starts to realize just how deep magic runs -- and that even though her kingdom is one of sunlight, with light, there always comes shadows. *** The first part of this story will appear on Tuesday, September 8. Parts will continue to be uploaded every Tues/Thurs through October 8. Look for ICE LIKE FIRE, out October 13 from Balzer + Bray/HarperCollins!

How To Be The Best Third Wheel de summerbackthen

How To Be The Best Third Wheel is now published as a Paperback & E-book by Wattpad Books! As a Wattpad reader, you can also now access the Original Edition for free and the Wattpad Books Published Edition here upon purchase. It's the last year of high school, and everything has changed . . . ***** After a summer spent in the Philippines, Lara Dela Cruz is eager to start her senior year and, most importantly, reunite with her three besties. But what she did not expect was to show up on the first day of school to all three of her friends now in relationships. Fighting for their attention, catching some new and confusing feelings for long-time frenemy James, and wading through the pressures of post-high-school plans all have Lara reeling. And to make matters worse, Lara's beautiful and untrustworthy cousin conveniently appears and wiggles her way right between her and James' budding relationship. Feeling like a third wheel in more ways than one, Lara must learn to accept that change is inevitable, love is complicated, and being the odd one out is sometimes where inner power is found. [[Word count: 100,000-150,000 words]] Cover design by Jill Caldwell Wattys 2020 YA fiction Winner Wattpad Books Prize Winner

(Book 1) Synopsis Audrey woke up and found that she had transmigrated into a book. As a mediocre actress, Audrey was satisfied with her income. Even though her parents favored boys over girls, at least she could support herself. Just when she had finally saved up some money and hadn't had a chance to enjoy it, she ended up in a different world?! She didn't know if it was God's mercy or compensation, but Audrey's role in the book was a wealthy heiress. In the book, her birth mother arranged for Audrey to be married into a wealthy family, and she had to compete with her other siblings for the family inheritance. The tragic outcome was predictable. Confused by the original character's actions, Audrey decided to lay low and become a wealthy but useless person. One day, Audrey's family members noticed that she had changed. Strangely enough, they could read her thoughts on her face. Even her second brother, who had always treated her like air, could see her sarcastic comments about him. [What's with that outfit today? Does he really think he looks good?] And when he was about to give up his directing career and return to the company, he could see the words on Audrey's face. [Why fight for power? Isn't it better to do what you love and still make money? You're so foolish.] Second brother: '...That makes sense.' The eldest sister, who had always ignored the subtitles on Audrey's face, finally noticed them one day. [Is she being foolish? Is it worth marrying for power? Doesn't she have enough money of her own?] After looking at her own wealth, the eldest sister quietly rejected the arranged marriage. Later on, Audrey noticed that her pocket money was increasing. As she gazed at the jewelry her second brother and eldest sister gave her, she fell into deep thought. THIS STORY IS NOT MINE!!!!! FOR OFFLINE PURPOSES ALL CREDITS TO THE AUTHOR AND TRANSLATOR. ... Book 1 (Completed) ✅ Book 2 (Ongoing)

after all de kovalactic

a collection of feelings and redemptions. © all rights reserved 2017 | kimi

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Slide 1 of 10

My Fake Boyfriend cover

My Billionaire Master: How I Ended Up Marrying A Disabled CEO cover

𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 • 𝐤𝐭𝐡 + 𝐜𝐛𝐠 cover

Dandy's World Gc🌼🌈 cover

[2] The Whole Family Is Insanely Eavesdropping on My Thoughts cover

Ghost Sweepers The XXX that only I can understand cover

Flames Like Vines cover

How To Be The Best Third Wheel cover

after all cover

My Fake Boyfriend

He was so close, his breath hit my lips. His eyes darted from my eyes to my lips. I stared intently, awaiting his next move. His lips fell near my ear. "Shut up and kiss me" He whispered roughly. A chill shot up my spine. I pulled back, staring at his eyes and leaned in.. ********** What happens when Alexis Dawson- "residential loser" of Redwood High, agrees to help Redwood High's player, Aaron Walker. How can she stop herself from falling for him? But it isn't all love and romance, Alexis has her own secret. Join them on the journey filled with jealousy, betrayal, trust, friendship and love. A little favour just got a whole lot more complicated.