Stages Of Grief

"Yearning for someone to connect with on such a level is something that anyone could want, and the same could be said for me. Once I thought I found that for myself, nothing would be the same. I was happier, I felt healthier, my mind was clearer. All of those thoughts of self loathing and self hatred had sizzled away under the damp finger of my newfound confidence. However, the feeling of sheer bliss was short lived. I was ghosted after weeks of trying to reconnect, feeling I was annoying them and thinking the worst of every situation. Conjuring the most poisonous of ideas to feed my brain and pump throughout my body once again. How could this happen, again? Why can I never find a true connection with anyone? What is wrong with me, to where no one can bear the thought of being related, ideally, to me? I'll never know. I'll never get the "why", and I'll never understand what I've done wrong."

"I guess I'll never understand."