Before you arrest me, can I please buy some chicken noodle soup?
  • Reads 548
  • Votes 29
  • Parts 28
  • Time 1h 56m
  • Reads 548
  • Votes 29
  • Parts 28
  • Time 1h 56m
Ongoing, First published Oct 31, 2021
"I just want some fucking carrots," Tommy muttered, ducking to avoid a bullet to the head.

Within minutes, the robbers were unconscious on the floor with zip ties around their wrists. Tommy shook them down for money and used it to pay for all the groceries he'd need this week. Of course the storeowner wouldn't snitch--Tommy had just saved his sorry ass.

With that, the blond vigilante skipped home to Ranboo.

"You're eating first, bitchass." He gleefully declared to his slightly frightened roommate. And indeed, Ranboo did eat first.

--

OR; in which Tommy and Ranboo are dirt poor vigilantes trying to provide for themselves and their bedridden best friend Tubbo. And when Ranboo loses his job, Tommy has to go for the next best thing:

An internship at the Hero HQ.
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𝙱𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙...𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐: 𝙴𝚗𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝙵𝚊𝚒𝚕𝚞𝚛𝚎...𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐: 𝙴𝚗𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝙵𝚊𝚒𝚕𝚞𝚛𝚎... 𝙱𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚙... The brothers clung to each other in fright as their father desperately tried to get their UFO stabilized. As if the constant beeping of the alarm and 'Warning: Engine Failure' didn't scare the boys enough, they both knew they were going to die. It was sad, really. A 13 and 15 year old positive they weren't going to live another five minutes. "╎ ↸𝙹リ'ℸ ̣ ∴ᔑリリᔑ ↸╎ᒷ, ʖ𝙹𝙹!" The blonde haired boy cried onto his older brothers shoulder. "⍑𝙹ꖎ↸ 𝙹リ, ʖ𝙹||ᓭ!" Their father yelled. Then everything went quiet. There was a ringing in the two boys' ears. Everything was blurry. We're they dead? We're they going to die? Where are they? Why was everything so...numb..? ~~~ SOOOOOO... new story!!! This is an Allium Duo Alien AU if you couldn't already tell. Even though it's Allium Duo, it's mostly Ranboo's POV. Sorry, I can't help it. I love Ranboo! This is NOT A SHIP!!!!!!!! I personally think that Tommy x Ranboo is a strange ship since they're just friends. And if I'm not mistaken, Tommy has asked to not be shipped with anyone. (Idk about Ranboo though) As you can tell by the two sentences in the description, some of this will be written in Enchantment Table language since you know...Aliens and stuff...BUT- I will be translating everything for you so don't worry! ~~~ TW: Cussing Death Crashes Injuries Blood Attempted su!c!ce Torture Angst etc... (TW's will be above chapters) ~~~ Started: September 5th, 2022 Put on hold: September 6th, 2022 (I was making other stories [and mental health was being an ass])