Destruction ||✔️

It was like that moment when you go under water, the sound of it filing up your ears, drowning everything out. That's how he would describe it. That hum of everything blurred. You feel like it's just you, the water, and the sky. The water warping the clouds above, time slowing down, everything setting still.

That's how he would describe himself.

Blurred, warped, drowning, still, alone.

But when you need air, when your lungs are screaming for this thing it craves, when your body is aching for this specific thing, that's when everything crumbles.

Your body is no longer still, the water is no longer quiet, and ears are still full, but with the loudness of the world around.

That's also how he would describe himself. He craves something, and then everything keeping him calm, keeping him sane, is destroyed.

He craves the destruction.

It's not intentional; he doesn't even realize he's doing it until it's already been done. He's always been like that though.

Sometimes everything just gets too still, too calm and he just...self destructs.

But something shifts him, shifts his life, his universe.

A smile. A light. A boy.

He is drowning, and there is a hand to pull him out. He's falling, and there is a safety net at the bottom. His world is loud, and then someone hands him headphones to drown it out.

Headphones connected to a computer, a gray and blue icon on his screen, leading him to a boy who is too perfect for him.

And when things get too perfect, he has this habit.

He destructs.

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This is a DNF fanfiction. Yes, I hate myself for it. No, I don't want to talk about it.