I won't be impressed by technology until I can download food - Suilion - Wattpad

I won't be impressed by technology until I can download food

Reads 13,812
Votes 1,382
Parts 200
Time 1h 16m

Reads 13,812
Votes 1,382
Parts 200
Time 1h 16m

food friends fun funny jokes just quotes stoies zombies

Hello there fellow humans. Get ready to listen to my story. If you can... Understand my humor... Then... You will love this...

"Batman out"

*Hits a wall*

"To be or not to be"

"Wait, wrong answer"

Highest ranking: 2 in humor. Wait... 2 as in 2! Wow!

This is my life folks. No I'm not kidding. It's all for real! Now I must get back to my Toothless plush named Batman!All Rights Reserved

food friends fun funny jokes just quotes stoies zombies

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Revenge Of The Fat Wallflower|✓ by Nikithasuz123

(Editing) His eyes widen and his lips part in pain as he stares wordlessly at me and then at the large blotch that forms around his chest . He clutches it as he coughs in pain. I didn't get to push him into a sewer, but this feels so much better. I sardonically chuckle to myself before leaning in to whisper into his ear. "Gotcha." - - - I was a nobody . A big fat wallflower that was always in the background. The only mistake I made was confessing to the school's prince. That day I was completely and utterly humiliated. It's been two years and now I'm back. Back for some sweet revenge. #Winner of the Pre-Watty awards for best laugh worthy book. *Filled with humor and jokes that can't stop you from chuckling ;) # 1 ranking in Stop bullying (10/5/18) #11 In Humor (1/6/18) ©Nikithasuz123 Cover credits to unreadymage. Amazing cover XD

F*** Cancer, This One Did Us All In. by IgnotusCapillary

There's not a lot that can freak me out in this world. Only large animals with sharp claws, too many people touching me, bullies, hives, horror movies, sitting underneath fans or lights or anything that dangles from a ceiling, glass or wooden bridges, my mother, mosquitoes, public situations, taking a shower with nobody in the house, taking a shower with too many people in the house and crocks. Oh, and zombies. Zombies is definitely on that list. It's almost a shame too, that I have to race through a city packed full of them to find my missing family. Packed full of zombies, by the way, not crocks. (Although I don't know which situation is worse.) Now I have to not only keep my feeble body alive, but also protect (or be protected by) my two best friends in the entire world as we all try to survive in a city packed with the Dead.

Joke Book! by SarahTheSmartAss

Second and third joke book completed as well go check 'em out! These jokes are the best jokes you will ever find! Do not copy my jokes you will be reported. All rights reserved. © Highest Rank In Humor: #397 #34 in funniest #677 book

Aᴘᴏᴄᴀʟʏᴘsᴇ|Jsᴄʜʟᴀᴛᴛ × Rᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ by gaywvresident

[𝙲𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚎] [𝚂𝙼𝚄𝚃 𝚆𝙰𝚁𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶] [𝙵𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚘𝚖: 𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚝𝚞𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚜] 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚕𝚍 𝚐𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚊 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚙𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚌 𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚟𝚒𝚛𝚞𝚜 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜 𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚜 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚑 𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚜. 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚌𝚞𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚢 𝚊 𝚐𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚙 𝚘𝚏 𝚋𝚘𝚢𝚜, 𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚖 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑. 𝙳𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚟𝚒𝚟𝚎? 𝙳𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚜 𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑 𝚊𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘? 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝙰𝚙𝚘𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚢𝚙𝚜𝚎 𝙰𝚄 𝙹𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚝 × 𝙵𝚎𝚖!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 [𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚍: 𝙽𝚘𝚟 𝟻, 𝟸0𝟸𝟸] [𝙴𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚍: 𝙽𝚘𝚟 𝟷, 𝟸0𝟸𝟹] 𝙸𝙼𝙿𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚂𝙸𝚅𝙴 𝚃𝙰𝙶𝚂 #1 - philzaminecraft (𝟸0𝟸𝟺)

𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐒, 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐨𝐧𝐞 by dantakeyoman

𝐛𝐭𝐛𝐚𝐭𝐛! 𝐠𝐮𝐲 𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦! 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 * "𝑰'𝒗𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒕𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏' 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒚𝒂 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒉𝒔... 𝑰 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕... 𝒅𝒊𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒉𝒐𝒘," 𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒂𝒏 𝒂 𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒂𝒊𝒓, "𝒀𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒔𝒐 𝒂𝒎𝒂𝒛𝒊𝒏𝒈, (𝒚/𝒏)... 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒔𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒕, 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒈, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒄𝒓𝒂𝒑 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒏𝒐𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚. 𝑰 𝒌𝒏𝒆𝒘 𝒊𝒕 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒎𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝑰 𝒎𝒆𝒕 𝒚𝒂 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏' 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍. 𝑨𝒏𝒅-" * 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐲𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐬, 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲, 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟, 𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬, 𝐞𝐭𝐜. 𝒅𝒆𝒅𝒊𝒄𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒊𝒍𝒂 𝒍𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆

ℂ𝕣𝕖𝕖𝕡𝕪𝕡𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕒: 𝕎𝕖𝕝𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝕥𝕠 ℍ𝕠𝕣𝕣𝕠𝕣 𝕋𝕠𝕨𝕟 (under editing) by Darkshadowlady438

Rankings: #357 rewritten out of 1.01k stories - 6/18/24, #419 rewritten out of 728 stories - 1/1/23 𝖶𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀: 𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗅𝗅𝗈𝗐𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖻𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗌 𝖬𝗎𝗋𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗌, 𝖬𝗈𝗇𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗌, 𝖣𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗁, 𝖪𝗂𝖽𝗇𝖺𝗉, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖾𝗅𝖾𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗆𝖺𝗒 𝖻𝖾 𝖽𝗂𝗌𝗍𝗎𝗋𝖻𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗌. 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚊 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚈/𝙽 𝙻/𝙽 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚜 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚊𝚍𝚘𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜. 𝚃𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚖𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚊 𝚜𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚍 𝙱𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝙷𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠. 𝚁𝚞𝚖𝚘𝚛 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚒𝚝, 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚑𝚊𝚞𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚢 𝚙𝚜𝚢𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚊𝚝𝚑𝚜, 𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚜, 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚋𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚍𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝𝚢 𝚍𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚜. 𝙷𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛, 𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚙𝚎𝚘𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚟𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚜𝚎 𝚛𝚞𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗𝚜 𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚝 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚙𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚜. 𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚙𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝙱𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝙷𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚈/𝙽 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚜 𝚘𝚗𝚎?

Hilarious Facebook Statuses :) by kayb121

Inspired by Han_Man: I'm going to be uploading at least 10 every week to give you pleasure and laughter, Maybe more ;) So, everytime I update, I need you all to do something for me... COMMENT YOUR FAVORITE! The first comment will always win the dedication for that chapter (if that's what you want to call it). But only if it's a comment on your favorite status. So ya...READ, VOTE, COMMENT, AND LAUGH!!! Ready set....GO!

The Satan's Eve (Completed)✔ NOT EDITED by Sheewrites_4fun

HIGHEST RANKING-1st in wedding! {23/05/18} & 1st in Laugh! {11/08/18} 13th in Romance! {03/12/18} Sequel to Mr Hulk's Jelly Bunny->Can be read as a stand alone book. Evelina/Velina Storm is a 22 year old half human-half vampire girl who works as a Manager at a restaurant despite the fact that her family is wealthy. You can say that she is the good type of girl but once you hit a bad nerve then well...goodluck. One thing she always keeps in mind is to never show her weaknesses no matter how the situation is. Adam Vernom is a 28 year old Vampire who is also a Ceo of the Vernom Company Ltd. He is the type of guy who you never want to mess with. Of all the things he hates, there is only one which he despises the most which is mates. Adam does not believe in mates, he thinks that they only exist just to destroy lives. What will happen when these two meet? What will happen when Adam know that Velina is his mate? Will Velina resist his seducing ability? Will Adam hate her? After all she is his mate... -------- He yanked me closer to him till our breaths became one and our tips of our noses touched. My eyes bulged like freaking saucers and were staring at his hot ones. "Satan huh? Then Let me show you how he is like." In one swift movement he crashed his plum lips onto mine. I wanted to push him away but could not. I felt my knees buckled and my stomach churned. There was a strange sensation which was restraining me from pushing him away. He plunged his moist tongue inside my mouth exploring every inch of it. My heart was racing and my breaths were hot. I could not help but move in sync with his pace. It was as if it was a magnet pulling me more and more to him. ------- P.s : Please do not copy or take my ideas as they are purely original and my imaginations. Thank you. ♡Also! If you enjoyed this story don't hesitate to share it with your friends! ;)

My Fictional Realm by FictionWorld2025

Welcome to the my fictional realm, where everything can and will happen! There's magic and surprises at every corner! See beautiful babes wearing thigh high boots, dead alligators, people acting weird, lip squeezing, magic wands, and so much more! Once you're in my fictional realm, there's no escape! ;)

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(Editing) His eyes widen and his lips part in pain as he stares wordlessly at me and then at the large blotch that forms around his chest . He clutches it as he coughs in pain. I didn't get to push him into a sewer, but this feels so much better. I sardonically chuckle to myself before leaning in to whisper into his ear. "Gotcha." - - - I was a nobody . A big fat wallflower that was always in the background. The only mistake I made was confessing to the school's prince. That day I was completely and utterly humiliated. It's been two years and now I'm back. Back for some sweet revenge. #Winner of the Pre-Watty awards for best laugh worthy book. *Filled with humor and jokes that can't stop you from chuckling ;) # 1 ranking in Stop bullying (10/5/18) #11 In Humor (1/6/18) ©Nikithasuz123 Cover credits to unreadymage. Amazing cover XD