I won't be impressed by technology until I can download food - Suilion - Wattpad

I won't be impressed by technology until I can download food

Reads 13,814
Votes 1,382
Parts 200
Time 1h 16m

Reads 13,814
Votes 1,382
Parts 200
Time 1h 16m

food friends fun funny jokes just quotes stoies zombies

Hello there fellow humans. Get ready to listen to my story. If you can... Understand my humor... Then... You will love this...

"Batman out"

*Hits a wall*

"To be or not to be"

"Wait, wrong answer"

Highest ranking: 2 in humor. Wait... 2 as in 2! Wow!

This is my life folks. No I'm not kidding. It's all for real! Now I must get back to my Toothless plush named Batman!All Rights Reserved

food friends fun funny jokes just quotes stoies zombies

Table of contents

200 parts

Sign up to add I won't be impressed by technology until I can download food to your library and receive updates

or

Content Guidelines

You may also like

Storytime With The Cool Dude by Thewritestuff651

Hey, peeps! I am back with another collection of short stories, that will keep you entertained! There will be stories about me, my friends, family, and random characters!! Sit back, and enjoy some short stories written by a very cool dude! 😎❤ Awesome cover done by my friend @TheWattKitty! ❤❤❤

My Fictional Realm by FictionWorld2025

Welcome to the my fictional realm, where everything can and will happen! There's magic and surprises at every corner! See beautiful babes wearing thigh high boots, dead alligators, people acting weird, lip squeezing, magic wands, and so much more! Once you're in my fictional realm, there's no escape! ;)

Love, Eternal | ✔️ by thesoullessstars

*Check TW* [Rewriting] "I told the stars about you" Persephone Drakos, a girl nobody notices who has learned to love loneliness, seemingly fine by anyone who chooses to glance at her as they pass by is secretly struggling with the loss of her sister and the sudden shift of her family. Kol Stevens is well known around school, some would even call him popular. He doesn't talk much, that is until she bumps into him and his eyes land on her for the first time. When the unlikely pair are put together for a project, will she be able to crack his shell and will be able to save her? ----- Taking a few steps back Kol furrows his eyebrows at my movements, unclear of what I'm going to do. I take a few seconds before rushing full speed at him jumping on him Only for him to catch me and not fall backwards like I had hoped His hands quickly move to hold my ass, well- "What the fuck Kol! What are you a fucking stone statue." I groan, whatever I guess it's option two. I shove my hand in his pocket, it's not in this one, i quickly move my hand to the other. "Aha! Next time don- Persephone" his voice low and husky I almost didn't hear him- "That's not your wallet" "Wha-" ohhh, I take my hand out of his pocket and quickly jump out of his hold. Rocking on my heels I'm sure my face resembles a ripe tomato. "You know that wouldn't have happened if you just gave me my wallet" Shrugging I turn on my heels and run "Oh no you don't!" Kol yells behind me as he begins to chase me around his room. Our laughter fills the otherwise empty house, I want to remember this moment. *Unedited*

Joke Book! by SarahTheSmartAss

Second and third joke book completed as well go check 'em out! These jokes are the best jokes you will ever find! Do not copy my jokes you will be reported. All rights reserved. © Highest Rank In Humor: #397 #34 in funniest #677 book

ℂ𝕣𝕖𝕖𝕡𝕪𝕡𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕒: 𝕎𝕖𝕝𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝕥𝕠 ℍ𝕠𝕣𝕣𝕠𝕣 𝕋𝕠𝕨𝕟 (under editing) by Darkshadowlady438

Rankings: #357 rewritten out of 1.01k stories - 6/18/24, #419 rewritten out of 728 stories - 1/1/23 𝖶𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀: 𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗅𝗅𝗈𝗐𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖻𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗌 𝖬𝗎𝗋𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗌, 𝖬𝗈𝗇𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗌, 𝖣𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗁, 𝖪𝗂𝖽𝗇𝖺𝗉, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖾𝗅𝖾𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗆𝖺𝗒 𝖻𝖾 𝖽𝗂𝗌𝗍𝗎𝗋𝖻𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗌. 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚊 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚈/𝙽 𝙻/𝙽 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚜 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚊𝚍𝚘𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜. 𝚃𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚖𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚊 𝚜𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚍 𝙱𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝙷𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠. 𝚁𝚞𝚖𝚘𝚛 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚒𝚝, 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚑𝚊𝚞𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚢 𝚙𝚜𝚢𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚊𝚝𝚑𝚜, 𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚜, 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚋𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚍𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝𝚢 𝚍𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚜. 𝙷𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛, 𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚙𝚎𝚘𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚟𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚜𝚎 𝚛𝚞𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗𝚜 𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚝 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚙𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚜. 𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚙𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝙱𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝙷𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚈/𝙽 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚜 𝚘𝚗𝚎?

Jokes and riddles! by GriffinWoodrow

Well, if you couldn't tell from the title, this is some random jokes, riddles and some tricky questions, hope you like it!

Cliché, Touché and Douche by FadedSmoke

{Completed - #12 highest} I was walking on a path all alone at midnight. I was just wondering around, until I saw a guy in a hoodie. He was beating the pulp out of another guy and one more man was on the ground, he was not moving. I gasped. 'Is he dead?' Or he can be unconscious, yeah 'el' he is just unconscious not dead. Duh! Who would kill a guy? As I was proceeding with my thoughts, that hoodie guy turned his face towards me. My heart had a mini heart attack. I turned my heels to the opposite direction and started to run. 'Run Ella, run for your life' was what my mind was screaming to me. I took turns without thinking, that guy was now following me and guess what? I took a wrong turn and which ended up being a dead end ' You are so dead' I thought. So, I started to think what I said last time to the people I love. 'Good night mom, love you.' to my mom, 'Stop annoying me! I'm going to bed.' to dad which also mean I love you, 'See you later Lu, love you!' to Luana. Okay my good bye says I love them all. Now I can die in peace. Granddad I'll meet you soon in the heaven, if you are there. I was still in my deep thoughts until I saw his silhouette. As, he get closer, my heart begin to race faster. I closed my eyes, until I heard him say "Ella?" O to the M to the G, this person actually knows me. I opened my one eye and saw him due to the small light hanging in that ally "Errrrr'ick!" I squeaked and mentally face palmed myself. Even at this state I'm calling him Errr'ick. "I'm sorry your highness, what can I do for you?" I squeaked again while trembling. The next second I heard his fits of laughter. He was rolling on the floor, actually rofling. I was glaring at him but I realised that I'm not in a position to glare. So, I made puppy dog face for him to spare my little life. He stopped but after seeing my face, he started to laugh again. He tried to say between his guffaws "You..... your face .....was epiccc!" He started to gasp for air and had tears in his eyes.

Hilarious Facebook Statuses :) by kayb121

Inspired by Han_Man: I'm going to be uploading at least 10 every week to give you pleasure and laughter, Maybe more ;) So, everytime I update, I need you all to do something for me... COMMENT YOUR FAVORITE! The first comment will always win the dedication for that chapter (if that's what you want to call it). But only if it's a comment on your favorite status. So ya...READ, VOTE, COMMENT, AND LAUGH!!! Ready set....GO!

The Satan's Eve (Completed)✔ NOT EDITED by Sheewrites_4fun

HIGHEST RANKING-1st in wedding! {23/05/18} & 1st in Laugh! {11/08/18} 13th in Romance! {03/12/18} Sequel to Mr Hulk's Jelly Bunny->Can be read as a stand alone book. Evelina/Velina Storm is a 22 year old half human-half vampire girl who works as a Manager at a restaurant despite the fact that her family is wealthy. You can say that she is the good type of girl but once you hit a bad nerve then well...goodluck. One thing she always keeps in mind is to never show her weaknesses no matter how the situation is. Adam Vernom is a 28 year old Vampire who is also a Ceo of the Vernom Company Ltd. He is the type of guy who you never want to mess with. Of all the things he hates, there is only one which he despises the most which is mates. Adam does not believe in mates, he thinks that they only exist just to destroy lives. What will happen when these two meet? What will happen when Adam know that Velina is his mate? Will Velina resist his seducing ability? Will Adam hate her? After all she is his mate... -------- He yanked me closer to him till our breaths became one and our tips of our noses touched. My eyes bulged like freaking saucers and were staring at his hot ones. "Satan huh? Then Let me show you how he is like." In one swift movement he crashed his plum lips onto mine. I wanted to push him away but could not. I felt my knees buckled and my stomach churned. There was a strange sensation which was restraining me from pushing him away. He plunged his moist tongue inside my mouth exploring every inch of it. My heart was racing and my breaths were hot. I could not help but move in sync with his pace. It was as if it was a magnet pulling me more and more to him. ------- P.s : Please do not copy or take my ideas as they are purely original and my imaginations. Thank you. ♡Also! If you enjoyed this story don't hesitate to share it with your friends! ;)

Aᴘᴏᴄᴀʟʏᴘsᴇ|Jsᴄʜʟᴀᴛᴛ × Rᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ by gaywvresident

[𝙲𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚎] [𝚂𝙼𝚄𝚃 𝚆𝙰𝚁𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶] [𝙵𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚘𝚖: 𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚝𝚞𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚜] 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚕𝚍 𝚐𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚊 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚙𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚌 𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚟𝚒𝚛𝚞𝚜 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜 𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚜 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚑 𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚜. 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚌𝚞𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚢 𝚊 𝚐𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚙 𝚘𝚏 𝚋𝚘𝚢𝚜, 𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚖 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑. 𝙳𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚟𝚒𝚟𝚎? 𝙳𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚜 𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑 𝚊𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘? 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝙰𝚙𝚘𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚢𝚙𝚜𝚎 𝙰𝚄 𝙹𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚝 × 𝙵𝚎𝚖!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 [𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚍: 𝙽𝚘𝚟 𝟻, 𝟸0𝟸𝟸] [𝙴𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚍: 𝙽𝚘𝚟 𝟷, 𝟸0𝟸𝟹] 𝙸𝙼𝙿𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚂𝙸𝚅𝙴 𝚃𝙰𝙶𝚂 #1 - philzaminecraft (𝟸0𝟸𝟺)

You may also like

Slide 1 of 10

Storytime With The Cool Dude cover

My Fictional Realm cover

Love, Eternal | ✔️ cover

Joke Book! cover

ℂ𝕣𝕖𝕖𝕡𝕪𝕡𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕒: 𝕎𝕖𝕝𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝕥𝕠 ℍ𝕠𝕣𝕣𝕠𝕣 𝕋𝕠𝕨𝕟 (under editing) cover

Jokes and riddles! cover

Cliché, Touché and Douche cover

Hilarious Facebook Statuses :) cover

The Satan's Eve (Completed)✔ NOT EDITED cover

Aᴘᴏᴄᴀʟʏᴘsᴇ|Jsᴄʜʟᴀᴛᴛ × Rᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ cover

Storytime With The Cool Dude

Hey, peeps! I am back with another collection of short stories, that will keep you entertained! There will be stories about me, my friends, family, and random characters!! Sit back, and enjoy some short stories written by a very cool dude! 😎❤ Awesome cover done by my friend @TheWattKitty! ❤❤❤