I won't be impressed by technology until I can download food
  • Reads 13,812
  • Votes 1,382
  • Parts 200
  • Time 1h 16m
  • Reads 13,812
  • Votes 1,382
  • Parts 200
  • Time 1h 16m
Complete, First published Dec 29, 2014
Hello there fellow humans. Get ready to listen to my story. If you can... Understand my humor... Then... You will love this...

"Batman out"

*Hits a wall*

"To be or not to be"

"Wait, wrong answer"

Highest ranking: 2 in humor. Wait... 2 as in 2! Wow!

This is my life folks. No I'm not kidding. It's all for real! Now I must get back to my Toothless plush named Batman!
All Rights Reserved
Table of contents
Sign up to add I won't be impressed by technology until I can download food to your library and receive updates
or
#779quotes
Content Guidelines
You may also like
A DYSPRAXIA LOVE STORY by HuggingWords
57 parts Complete
Completed, but under editing and rewriting. Situation and diction may change, but not the storyline or character. *** "W-when d-did t-they b-build a w-w all on t-the h-hallway?" I asked no one in particular. I rubbed my head with my eyes shut to ease the pain that shot through my head. The sound of laughter made me freeze with my hand on my head. I opened my eyes, slowly. Three handsome boys were staring at me. No, two of the boys were trying to stifle a smile while one of the boys was staring blankly at me. Rude much? It seemed he was the one I hit and not a wall. Thanks Mary for stating the obvious. I stared at his chest probably because he was taller than I am and I had to look up to meet his face. His abs were visible through the blue shirt he wore. Staring at abs in this situation. Oh God! I'm weird. "First you get to be called a wall, interesting. And now, she is checking you out. It isn't fair. Why do you always get the beautiful ones?" One of the boys groaned. I blushed. I was checking a guy out. Wait, What? Did I just blush? Kill me! "I- I m seery, I debt mean to hat you." What did I just say? This couldn't get any worse. The boys looked shocked even the mute handsome boy looked a little bit surprised. Why did I keep calling him handsome? "I-I'm s-sorry I h-hit you, I d-didn't mean to," that sounded better. "Oh," one of the boys said. Oh! Indeed. I was expecting a reply, but the handsome boy in front of me refused to talk. Is he dumb or deaf? "I am Tom. And I am not dumb nor deaf," he said and walked away. I didn't say that aloud, did I? Guess I did. "You did, baby girl," one of the two boys said an. He waved at me dragging his smirking friend with him. That was embarrassing.
Cliché, Touché and Douche by FadedSmoke
22 parts Complete
{Completed - #12 highest} I was walking on a path all alone at midnight. I was just wondering around, until I saw a guy in a hoodie. He was beating the pulp out of another guy and one more man was on the ground, he was not moving. I gasped. 'Is he dead?' Or he can be unconscious, yeah 'el' he is just unconscious not dead. Duh! Who would kill a guy? As I was proceeding with my thoughts, that hoodie guy turned his face towards me. My heart had a mini heart attack. I turned my heels to the opposite direction and started to run. 'Run Ella, run for your life' was what my mind was screaming to me. I took turns without thinking, that guy was now following me and guess what? I took a wrong turn and which ended up being a dead end ' You are so dead' I thought. So, I started to think what I said last time to the people I love. 'Good night mom, love you.' to my mom, 'Stop annoying me! I'm going to bed.' to dad which also mean I love you, 'See you later Lu, love you!' to Luana. Okay my good bye says I love them all. Now I can die in peace. Granddad I'll meet you soon in the heaven, if you are there. I was still in my deep thoughts until I saw his silhouette. As, he get closer, my heart begin to race faster. I closed my eyes, until I heard him say "Ella?" O to the M to the G, this person actually knows me. I opened my one eye and saw him due to the small light hanging in that ally "Errrrr'ick!" I squeaked and mentally face palmed myself. Even at this state I'm calling him Errr'ick. "I'm sorry your highness, what can I do for you?" I squeaked again while trembling. The next second I heard his fits of laughter. He was rolling on the floor, actually rofling. I was glaring at him but I realised that I'm not in a position to glare. So, I made puppy dog face for him to spare my little life. He stopped but after seeing my face, he started to laugh again. He tried to say between his guffaws "You..... your face .....was epiccc!" He started to gasp for air and had tears in his eyes.
ℂ𝕣𝕖𝕖𝕡𝕪𝕡𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕒: 𝕎𝕖𝕝𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝕥𝕠 ℍ𝕠𝕣𝕣𝕠𝕣 𝕋𝕠𝕨𝕟 (under editing) by Darkshadowlady438
42 parts Complete
Rankings: #357 rewritten out of 1.01k stories - 6/18/24, #419 rewritten out of 728 stories - 1/1/23 𝖶𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀: 𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗅𝗅𝗈𝗐𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖻𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗌 𝖬𝗎𝗋𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗌, 𝖬𝗈𝗇𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗌, 𝖣𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗁, 𝖪𝗂𝖽𝗇𝖺𝗉, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖾𝗅𝖾𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗆𝖺𝗒 𝖻𝖾 𝖽𝗂𝗌𝗍𝗎𝗋𝖻𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗌. 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚊 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚈/𝙽 𝙻/𝙽 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚜 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚊𝚍𝚘𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜. 𝚃𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚖𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚊 𝚜𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚍 𝙱𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝙷𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠. 𝚁𝚞𝚖𝚘𝚛 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚒𝚝, 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚑𝚊𝚞𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚢 𝚙𝚜𝚢𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚊𝚝𝚑𝚜, 𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚜, 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚋𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚍𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝𝚢 𝚍𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚜. 𝙷𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛, 𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚙𝚎𝚘𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚟𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚜𝚎 𝚛𝚞𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗𝚜 𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚝 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚙𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚜. 𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚙𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝙱𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝙷𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚈/𝙽 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚜 𝚘𝚗𝚎?
The Satan's Eve (Completed)✔ NOT EDITED by Sheewrites_4fun
51 parts Complete Mature
HIGHEST RANKING-1st in wedding! {23/05/18} & 1st in Laugh! {11/08/18} 13th in Romance! {03/12/18} Sequel to Mr Hulk's Jelly Bunny->Can be read as a stand alone book. Evelina/Velina Storm is a 22 year old half human-half vampire girl who works as a Manager at a restaurant despite the fact that her family is wealthy. You can say that she is the good type of girl but once you hit a bad nerve then well...goodluck. One thing she always keeps in mind is to never show her weaknesses no matter how the situation is. Adam Vernom is a 28 year old Vampire who is also a Ceo of the Vernom Company Ltd. He is the type of guy who you never want to mess with. Of all the things he hates, there is only one which he despises the most which is mates. Adam does not believe in mates, he thinks that they only exist just to destroy lives. What will happen when these two meet? What will happen when Adam know that Velina is his mate? Will Velina resist his seducing ability? Will Adam hate her? After all she is his mate... -------- He yanked me closer to him till our breaths became one and our tips of our noses touched. My eyes bulged like freaking saucers and were staring at his hot ones. "Satan huh? Then Let me show you how he is like." In one swift movement he crashed his plum lips onto mine. I wanted to push him away but could not. I felt my knees buckled and my stomach churned. There was a strange sensation which was restraining me from pushing him away. He plunged his moist tongue inside my mouth exploring every inch of it. My heart was racing and my breaths were hot. I could not help but move in sync with his pace. It was as if it was a magnet pulling me more and more to him. ------- P.s : Please do not copy or take my ideas as they are purely original and my imaginations. Thank you. ♡Also! If you enjoyed this story don't hesitate to share it with your friends! ;)
You may also like
Slide 1 of 10
A DYSPRAXIA LOVE STORY cover
Cliché, Touché and Douche cover
ℂ𝕣𝕖𝕖𝕡𝕪𝕡𝕒𝕤𝕥��𝕒: 𝕎𝕖𝕝𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝕥𝕠 ℍ𝕠𝕣𝕣𝕠𝕣 𝕋𝕠𝕨𝕟 (under editing) cover
The Satan's Eve (Completed)✔ NOT EDITED cover
A Whole 75 Pages of xD cover
Revenge Of The Fat Wallflower|✓ cover
F*** Cancer, This One Did Us All In. cover
chatroom.com»hs✓ cover
Joke Book! cover
Quick Hero cover

A DYSPRAXIA LOVE STORY

57 parts Complete

Completed, but under editing and rewriting. Situation and diction may change, but not the storyline or character. *** "W-when d-did t-they b-build a w-w all on t-the h-hallway?" I asked no one in particular. I rubbed my head with my eyes shut to ease the pain that shot through my head. The sound of laughter made me freeze with my hand on my head. I opened my eyes, slowly. Three handsome boys were staring at me. No, two of the boys were trying to stifle a smile while one of the boys was staring blankly at me. Rude much? It seemed he was the one I hit and not a wall. Thanks Mary for stating the obvious. I stared at his chest probably because he was taller than I am and I had to look up to meet his face. His abs were visible through the blue shirt he wore. Staring at abs in this situation. Oh God! I'm weird. "First you get to be called a wall, interesting. And now, she is checking you out. It isn't fair. Why do you always get the beautiful ones?" One of the boys groaned. I blushed. I was checking a guy out. Wait, What? Did I just blush? Kill me! "I- I m seery, I debt mean to hat you." What did I just say? This couldn't get any worse. The boys looked shocked even the mute handsome boy looked a little bit surprised. Why did I keep calling him handsome? "I-I'm s-sorry I h-hit you, I d-didn't mean to," that sounded better. "Oh," one of the boys said. Oh! Indeed. I was expecting a reply, but the handsome boy in front of me refused to talk. Is he dumb or deaf? "I am Tom. And I am not dumb nor deaf," he said and walked away. I didn't say that aloud, did I? Guess I did. "You did, baby girl," one of the two boys said an. He waved at me dragging his smirking friend with him. That was embarrassing.