My Runaway

My Runaway

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WpMetadataReadMatureOngoing5m
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Sun, Jan 16, 2022
As rain is pouring its droplets onto the muddy floor, I am decided, confused but ready to spell my thoughts. I've never ordered my mind or could easily think things through. Thousands of questions popping, such as unstoppable flashes of an old camera, in my mind. Several of them finish unanswered, due to lack of personal or human knowledge. Slowly crawling, finding their way while the deep black unanswered questions hole of my mind widens. Tonight, I packed my stuff. I am leaving, this shitty home, this shitty daily life routine. I'm just sick of it all. And feel ready to explore, to free my heart, buried deep down in its solid hole. One way or another, the unknown attracts me, I'm brave enough to sink in it.
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I woke to a sudden breeze invading the warmth from the heavy blanket that caressed my skin. Here, alone with my thoughts, the still, calm quiet in the atmosphere is almost painful. I feel suffocated in the clingy, static air. In quiet, still moments like these, I can almost feel Him. I don't know who "Him" is, but I can feel his presence. It's almost calming, especially on fearful, anxiety fueled nights. Usually, he was the strongest when I had a nightmare. The nightmares weren't as common now, but, right after everything happened, I was having them every night. I'd wake up and swear I was drenched in blood, my eyes and lips sticky, my nose filled with the smell of iron and fuel. After everything, that's when Him first came. From there, he just never left. I can usually sense when Him is near. Today, though, his presence is stronger. I can almost feel Him next to me, weighing down the mattress. Some nights, I roll over and imagine how he looks, envision his smile or the sparkle in his eyes. He's never there and I'm left clutching to the thought that he exists, staring into empty air. Tonight, though, I swear I can reach out and touch him. Extending my hand gently, I sweep my hand out into the darkness and meet an inexplicable warmth. A scream rips from my lungs as hands cover my face and two icy blue eyes stare back at me, daring me to speak again. A soft cloth caressed my nose and mouth before I felt myself fade into bed. All Rights Reserved. Contains graphic descriptions of violence and assault. Contains battle scene.

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