Thanks, Grandpa.

Y
es, my name’s Eugene, first impressions …my name, it’s a mock in itself, don’t I just know it. My Grandpa couldn’t have chosen a normal name like Toby or Jack; no, it had to be the unfamiliar type, a name that Grandpa would find amusing to say. Eugene Chester Starkey. My awful name, my dreadful life, that’s me. And that’s just the beginning; if you thought that seemed ruthless you haven’t seen anything, compared with the rest …