submerged | eren jaeger
Starting over, you've discovered, is mostly a matter of place; put enough miles between yourself and everything that came before, find a roommate you like, make friends with people who know nothing about you, and eventually the person you used to be begins to feel like some distant cousin.
Shiganshina is good for that. Eren Jaeger is not.
He's your roommate's friend, then yours, then something considerably more inconvenient. He's infuriating in ways that become intimate, intimate in ways that become problematic, and somewhere along the line, disliking him becomes difficult to separate from want.
The trouble with becoming close to someone is that you never notice it happening. There's no moment when the water reaches your throat. No warning that you've wandered too far from shore.
By then, you're already submerged.