And then he fell

And then he fell

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Fri, Jan 9, 2015
When I said "I'm over him." what I really meant was; He still makes me laugh when we talk, I still pray for him to love me and be with me again, I still wish for him at 11:11, I cry myself to sleep almost every night while thinking about what we had, what we could've had and what I want us to be in the future. I still think of him 24/7, I'm still in love with him, I'm still in pain, I still want him and I still love him with everything that I have, and everything that I am. When someone tells me he does not deserve me. I still answer "Yes he does," and I even sometimes say "I didn't deserve him and thats why he left," even though I know it's not right. I'm still jealous of the girl he's now in love with, and I still wish it was me. I still have his number on my phone, and I've not deleted the messages he sent me. I still got his picture, and I'm so.not.over.him
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❝𝙎𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙙 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙄 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣'𝙩 𝙚𝙭𝙞𝙨𝙩.❞ I finally snap, this whole time I thought it was in my head but I was wrong. Everyone was right about him. "You're not listening to me Brylan." He begs but I don't care for it. I don't 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 to care for it. Taking another step back I need a breather from him but he doesn't allow it. Stepping into me he acts as if he'd die if he where to let me go. Reaching out I feel him grab my upper arm and that's when I lose my shit. "Get the 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬 away from me!" Catching him off guard he lets go in shock. Taking another step back, this time he doesn't try to fill the space, he just stares. - Dating your sister's older brother sounds like something straight out of a romance novel. As someone who experienced it I can tell you right now that it is. Well, it was. Ever since he moved states for university it was as if a brick wall was built between us. I still love him but it doesn't feel the same. It's hard to explain how gutting it feels to watch your relationship with someone you love change, but you're too far to do anything about it. Unless 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 changed and it's all in my head. Maybe I'm the only one who sees it. 𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 the things people have been saying is finally getting though to me.

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