This is a joke - salty_chickens - Wattpad

Story cover for This is a joke by salty_chickens

This is a joke

Reads 54
Votes 7
Parts 3
Time 10m

Reads 54
Votes 7
Parts 3
Time 10m

I sat in my favourite chair, watching Eastenders. God, Chelsea is soooo hot. She reminds me of my ex. Emily... 
That's when I remember why I was crying. EMILY FUCKING BROKE UP WITH ME THE SILLY BABOON!!! 
I drift off in my thought of her before hearing a perplex noise. Is that... a shart, I just heard?All Rights Reserved

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3 parts

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Beauty From Above (Emison) by KissAssBih

'L' is not a person. It's just my thought. She always mess with me whenever I'm around Emily. She appeared when I started to have feelings towards Emily. When Emily smiles to me or whenever she's walking in my direction,L would say 'Looks like she's coming to get you. Get a room!' She would give me super naughty thoughts and it's just annoying. But i just ignore it when I'm with Emily. I can't tell her why I have these thoughts and my feelings. Besides,I'm here at the theme park with Hanna. So that's cool. "Where are you going?! The line is about to be less!" "Sorry! I have to go pee! Go ride without me!" "Wait!" Okay,not the best day ever. Now I have to sit beside a stranger. Oh shit. Oh no. No,no,no,no,no,no.

Accidental Love by fruitfulbliss

I Sydney Lopes, Didn't Expect The Unexpected, I Feel In Love With A Boy, A Boy I Never Thought I'd Fall For, A Nerdy Math Tutor. Accidentaly Took His Phone When I Got Into A Fight, With My Best Friend, Or Should I Say So Called, She Slept With My Boy Friend, So I Had To Beat Both Of Them. One Day We Met At A Park, To Return Each Others Phone, I Found Him Attractive, So I Ask Him Did He Wanna Hang, Of Corse He Said Yes. We Hung Out A lot, He Eventually Took Trinity's spot (EX best friend), One day I Had To Confess I Had My Feelings For Him, We Took Me On Dates, Romantic Dates, That Obviously Made Me Like Him More, Who Would Have Known I Would Fall In Love With A Boy, When I Only Accidentaly Took His Phone, Its Like An, Accidental Love.

"My Little Monster~"|| Selever X Reader [DISCONTINUED] by lazyazz_bijj

Hello! This is my first book so there will probably be some Errors but i'll try my best to fix it. Also English is not my native language so pardon my bad grammar😅😅😅 . Anyway here are some keywords: (Y/N) = Your Name (L/N) = Last Name (H/C) = Hair Colour (H/L) = Hair Length (F/C) = Favourite Colour (S/F/C) = Second Favourite Colour (F/F) = Favorite Food (F/D) = Favourite Drink (F/S) =Favourite Sweet (B/N) = Brother's Name (M/N) = Mother's Name (F/N) = Father's Name __________________________________________________________________________________ You're on college btw and (Y/N) is female. here's a peek at my book. _________________________________________It was a sunday morning and you were making lunch for you and you're roommates. Suddenly you got a call from the headmaster saying that you and your roommates would be having a new roommate and that they would be arriving after lunch. ~Time Skip~ You were playing video games on the couch when you heard a knock on the door. You were confused on why there were knocking on the door because it was Sunday and most of the students were out doing god knows what. Then you suddenly remembered that the headmaster told you that you were having a new roommate today. You opened the door and you see a cute half human half demon boy. "Oh! You must be our new roommate. Nice to meet you, My name's (Y/N) (L/N)." You introduced yourself. "Sup cutie. The names Selever nice to meet you." ............... That's all folks! If you want more of this story, I suggest you read this book. Edit: Just a fair warning. Some chapters may have been jumbled Because of an error so please check the chapters before you read them please.

What's a Doctor Who? by Vsdninja

"Vixen!" He growled behind us. The sound of roaring engines deafened me. I could barely hear anything. We jumped down the steps and onto the pavement below. I looked back and saw Max just jump down the whole flight. Without hesitation too. The Doctor pulled me across the lot, "Vixen!!" I could hear the anger in his voice. Oh, it was either run or die for me now. I looked back once again and saw his eyes were dead black, his teeth looked sharper from a distance, and I was so scared, he looked like his muscles grew bigger, "Run!" The Doctor yelled at me. I focused on running. Where are we gonna go anyhow? I don't think Max is ever gonna stop chasing me. Not until I'm dead. Who am I? I'm a girl with no past. Well, not a good one anyway. I've had a terrible childhood, nothing good about it and now it carries on into my adult life. Well, what am I to do? Nothing, exactly. There's nothing I can do. But I did meet this one guy at the airport one day. Kind of a weird dude considering he calls himself The Doctor and seems to bring along girls to his "Trips". Yeah, that's how I got caught up in all of this, just comes up to me and asked "Do you wanna go on a trip?" Yeah, like that works. Ha! Well, funny enough, it did and now Max is after me and I'm running around with this guy. But this guy....this stranger....was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Change My Mind (Harry Styles Fanfiction) by vibrantlouis

I finally focus enough to see who it is. Jarred? I start panting worriedly. I try to get away from Jarred, scurrying across the hardwood floor, trying to make as much noise as I can to wake up Harry. I'm not loud enough. I manage to stand up, still not able to get anything to come out of my mouth. I trip over my foot clumsily and fall on my face loudly. 'C'mon Harry wake up, please,' I think to myself. I look up at Jarred and I see a fist coming toward my face. It hits me, shattering every part of the left side of my jaw. I'm starting to bleed rapidly. Just another love story... But do normal love stories involve a psycho ex-boyfriend who will do anything to get his 'love' back? Does a normal love story involve a forgetful past that leads unforgivable mistakes? How did I get wrapped up in this mess. Because I'm Ari Sage and I'm a magnet for disaster. Why? That's just one problem I'm trying to solve. In the end, where does the deadly situation lead to?

Trapped In Love ✓ by StellaAdamsHere

"C- Can you move b- back a little?" My words made him smirk and if it's even possible, he came closer. Why do I always have to stuck between him and the desk?! "Why? Am I making you nervous?" "No." I lied. Ofcourse, he was making me nervous. His eyes had the power to hold a person on his place and that's what his eyes were doing to me. "Really?" He asked, putting his hands on my waist and pulling me closer towards him. On instinct, I put my hands on his chest. I didn't like it. I didn't like the way my body was responding to his touches. "T- This is un- unprofessional." I choked out the words, but I wish I couldn't have. He brought his face closer, so close that I could feel his minty breath on my lips. My lips parted accordingly in shock. "Oh, is it?" He said, mockingly. Oh god! What have I gotten myself into? •••• Aaron Steele, the CEO of the multi billionaire Steele's Company was the eligible bachelor of 25. He always had his way among girls and having blue eyes, a chiseled jaw and a hot body, didn't help either. With new woman on her arms every other day, he was obviously not planning on falling on that cliché word also called love, but would his thoughts of not falling in love still remain the same, after meeting her? Sienna Collins was a girl of 22 with extremely shy personality. After completing her graduation, the only thing in her mind was to get a good job and settle on her own, but what she didn't expected was a job at Steele's Company. This is a story of the innocent and the sinful. Read inside to find out what happens when two persons from exactly opposite worlds collide together. #I would suggest 14+ to read this story as some part in the book contains mature scenes. ~ # 37 in Romance #12 in humor *I am not a grammer nazzy, so there would be grammatical mistakes.*

Perfect Fate ✔ (Moved To Inkitt) by fanoshkaflippo

Wattpad Creator! Happy and proud. HIM: Staying the night? Not my thing. Hearts and flowers? Boring. Falling in love? Not anytime soon. Settling down? Off the table. Getting married? You're kidding me, right? That was me before the night we first met. Because, well, meeting a hot chick that made me hard just by looking at her was definitely not in my plans when I sneaked out of a woman's apartment after what was already a long night. Taking her home and getting her a chocolate cake, though, was kind of intentional. But falling for her? Boy, that was pretty much inevitable. HER: He came out of nowhere, literally. I was there, sitting on that bench, barefoot and crying and just getting my heart broken in peace and silence. Then he appeared, all mad and furious and sexy and tall and just drool-worthy! And just like that, despite my poor attempts of escaping him, he had me wrapped in his world. A crazy yet heart-fluttering world, that I have absolutely no intentions of leaving anytime soon. ------- Character development is a main theme in this book. It shows you how they both work on changing for the better, while trying to overcome the obstacles in their relationship and fight for each other till the end. ** Warning!! Some chapters contain sexual scenes, but there's always a warning at the head of the chapter. Do not read them if you're under 18.** * Also, please beware that this story contains a lot of swearing. Read at your own risk. * **I don't own any photos used in this book. All are found on the internet for public use.** Highest Rankings: Sexy - #1 Love - #1 General Fiction - #41 Romance - #46 ------ ** Copyright © 2014 by Fanoshka Flippo (Farah Fekry). All rights reserved. No part of this document may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior written permission of Fanoshka Flippo / Farah Fekry. **

INSATIABLE by Dara57

He brought his hands up and tucked my hair behind my ear. coming closer to my ear "Do i arouse you?" he whispered, making my knees weak "I can feel the heat radiating off you and i know you are soaking wet already" What the hell? Pushing him off me i straightened up and glared at him "You are now my boss starting tomorrow and i dont think it is appropriate to use comments like that with an employee." He suddenly jammed on the elevator emergency button, causing the elevator to stop. "Really? That would make this more exciting and easier. "I am attracted to you, you are attracted to me. Lets fuck and be fine" I stared at him wide eyed Has this man gone mad? I admit that he is hot and affects me a little but that doesn't mean i want to jump into bed with him, he is my boss for crying out loud and i really need this job" He was now standing in front of me with his face close to mine staring at my lips. I want to kiss you" He whispered making me feel chills all over my body. ***************************************************** Blake Greyson wasn't born with a silver spoon but he worked all his life to get to the top. Too as one of the eligible billionaires in Florida with his beautiful girlfriend Anna by his side every step away. Mellisa Wakefield is a young woman in her early twenties who is yet to get her life together. She fails miserably in whatever she does and her sister never misses the opportunity to remind her of how much of a loser she was until she got a job at Greyson's enterprise. Two different people tangled into a life of love, sex and betrayal.

COMPLICATED DESIRE | EDITING | by AuthorGirlyGlow22

Dammit " I yelled . Why can't this damn employees watch where they are going. " I'm so so sorry , I didn't see you." The person replied with panicking voice . She tried to wipe the coffee with her hands but , was making it worse. Argh ! badly wanted to see who has a beautiful voice but I didn't bother because I was way beyond fustrated to the point I would to strangle this person. " Next time watch where you are going you slut !". I yelled at that person. I need to go and change now. "Look you asshole , I didn't see you okay. And dont yell at me you motherfucker. Its Your fault that the coffee spilled out. You don't even know me yet you called me a slut. Go fuck your pussy man and learn to respect others nxn". She replied. . I looked up to see who dared to insult me like that , i saw beautiful girl.My blood was boiling . They fucking called me an asshole. Before I could observe, she stormmed off angrily. I sighed. Now i gotta change my shirt A bit A bit drama, but its feeling Read more. soon to be deleted.

A Walk Through Hell *ABANDONED* by icallitambrosia

I sat in my first period english class, my teacher grading papers or whatever it is that teachers do when you walk in. Soon the first bell rung, and people filed in. The usual suspects, the nerds, the cool kids, the "we hate liz" kids, and so on and so forth. But Imagine my surprise when I see a kid with blonde straighted hair, and an under cut roll in. And I mean that literally, he rolled in, in a pair of healies. I couldn't take my eyes off this peculiar specicimine. A woman from the office handed my teacher a note, who then attended her attention to the odd looking boy standing behind her. "What's your name?" She smiled. "Jaimie." The boy smiled right back.

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Slide 1 of 10

Beauty From Above (Emison) cover

Accidental Love cover

"My Little Monster~"|| Selever X Reader [DISCONTINUED] cover

What's a Doctor Who? cover

Change My Mind (Harry Styles Fanfiction) cover

Trapped In Love ✓ cover

Perfect Fate ✔ (Moved To Inkitt) cover

INSATIABLE cover

COMPLICATED DESIRE | EDITING | cover

A Walk Through Hell *ABANDONED* cover

Beauty From Above (Emison)

'L' is not a person. It's just my thought. She always mess with me whenever I'm around Emily. She appeared when I started to have feelings towards Emily. When Emily smiles to me or whenever she's walking in my direction,L would say 'Looks like she's coming to get you. Get a room!' She would give me super naughty thoughts and it's just annoying. But i just ignore it when I'm with Emily. I can't tell her why I have these thoughts and my feelings. Besides,I'm here at the theme park with Hanna. So that's cool. "Where are you going?! The line is about to be less!" "Sorry! I have to go pee! Go ride without me!" "Wait!" Okay,not the best day ever. Now I have to sit beside a stranger. Oh shit. Oh no. No,no,no,no,no,no.