I worked for longer than anyone could imagine... Just for it to come to this... No matter what I do... Nothing is ever good enough. Maybe this is my place in life. Maybe this is just my destiny: Failure.
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Gazing into the mind of an antagonist who's drive for success led him down the wrong rabbit hole. A man living in the shadows of a broken world. Though maybe the world wasn't broken. Maybe it was just him all along. Maybe the broken world broke him too, and if everything's broken, it's perfectly fine, right?
Mostly following the plot of Spirit Tracks, through Byrne's eyes, and his desperate attempt to gain power for a reason misinterpreted, though probably understandable. I've put my own original turns on this every now and then, as one would probably expect, but it's not romance, none of that hopeless crap. But rather, a thin line of grief and denial. Exchanging one life for another.
Of course however, in the end... Is it really Byrne's mind? Or another? It's debatable, depending on how technical you'd want to get...
It follows memories, feelings-even conflicting ones. I don't write to impress people, so don't get your hopes up. I didn't start proof reading until after Chapter Four, so prepare yourself. The story, being carried in first person, I tried to put emphasis on one's head. I don't think there's too much drama, I wanted things to at least make some kind of sense... But, alas, everything is just a perspective, for each of us. I don't think I'm right, but I don't think I'm wrong. We don't really know what happened, so I suppose that's the beauty of freedom. We can theorize whatever we want.
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If you enjoy my story, don't be afraid to drop a vote. Touch that star, it's free and doesn't cost you anything.
(I've rewritten the entire story multiple times over the course of several years... I swear... I think this is the one. This is it. I can feel it in my ancient soul and withering mind. It may not be perfect, but it makes due.)
***this book contains suicidal thoughts and tendencies, may not be appropriate for younger audiences***
In which she looks for the purpose of life.
Lily Carter's parents died in a car crash leaving her and Laura, girl was depressed long before her parents passed away and with all the problems turning up now, Lily felt more miserable - if that's even possible.
With her journey to look for life's purpose and grab the small pinch of HOPE - which is ironically her second name -, will she finally snap at the pressure and finally end it all? or will a small light lit her darkened world of grief and loneliness?
*
"So you know. The little goth girl who gets bullied is indeed a mess. There's this mess in her head that eats her alive everyday isn't it? What to do now Kaden? Tell the whole neighborhood and recieve an award for taking out a crazy in this world?" I spit like vomit.
His eyes warmed up as I finished, "Lily. It isn't like that"
"What is it then? People stopped caring... they gave up, why aren't you?" I fought my tears.
"Because I feel the need to care. Did Leigh hurt you? Did she hit you?" he finally noticed the unusual redness of my cheek.
I don't like the way he told me he needed to care for me. I felt like an obligation, a responsibility that he is carrying and carrying leads to getting tired and when people gets tired, they give up. I don't want them to give up on me. But they will, so it's good not to make them care for me in the first place.
"I never needed anyone. I stopped needing anyone before, why start now?" I uttered the words again.
Why?
There is nothing to fight for. No mama. No papa. No sister to love me. No one. So why would I waste my life and the time of others to fix what is already broken - and someone who doesn't want to be fixed? If I may add.
Maybe I gave up. No, scratch that. I gave up a long time ago - when my parents died, my hope and purpose went away with them.