What If one day I Say I Don't Love you

He was not my first love.
He Wasn't my first liking too.
But He has the entire existence of pure charm and deep intensity
of my first love..

I really Don't wanna fall for him in this stupid way.
Trust me,I Don't wanna love him blindly like an one-sided freak
by ruining herself completely.
I'm afraid.
I'm scarred.

What if one day I Don't find any word to give him?
or any story to tell him?

What if one day I can never express my fearful awesome
pieces of feelings that I Stored for him?

What if one day my language of love roam around everywhere like
a gypsy rhythm instead of being captured on my Diary?

What if one day I ended up telling you that you should never love
someone deeply from inside your heart,by breaking yourself apart?
Cause as much as you love,you have to get lost in the blackness of sadness..

What If one day I wanna be more sucker for your love knowing that
I couldn't be able?

Once again,What if one day I started screaming saying-'unexpected, uninvited, unknown depressed silence of rib-broken pain, I Don't want them anymore?'

What you'll do then?

Don't tell me you'll say-'Fine,Then stop loving me'..
Don't ever dreamt of such kind of absurd stuff.

But why on earth God Gave me the power of loving someone intensely
without seeing him face to face even once in my Lifetime? 🌸

@lilithshamarokhtkyz