Alessandra Eres has a heart full of love, but doesn't know what to do with it. From a young age she fell in love with the idea of love, and being loved. She's wanted nothing more than to be truly loved her whole life. However, life complicates things, and forces her to see the duality of love and loss. She goes from boy to boy confessing her love in hopes someone will feel the same way, but she's too young, too mature for her age. When she meets her best friend, her life changes dramatically. She knows she's going to love him for a very long time. But as they grow up, Alessandra's idea of love begins to grow and change. Will the childhood lovers be able to hold on to what they have? Or will life get in the way of their supposedly eternal love.
This book is a series of triumphs and defeats, love and loss, in the never ending journey that is self-discovery. Most of the events in this book happened to me and are based around my life. In the same way, majority of the characters are based around real people. This story is not meant to attack, demonise, offend or upset anyone. Don't be mad at me. I love you all.
Ella is falling apart trying to live a "perfect" high school life. Then she meets Ren, who can see past her scars. Suddenly perfection isn't her only option.
*****
Ella Volkov is a gifted music student, but she's depressed and starting to crack under the pressure of high school. Her overbearing father won't even let her choose what instrument she plays. Then she finds herself alone at a party with Ren, her best friend's crush. She'd always thought he was rude, but after that night he's all Ella can think about. Now she's trapped. If Ella dates Ren, it will ruin her friendship with Jenny. But if she stays true to Jenny, she's losing the one person who can see past her scars. It's up to Ella to decide if she will forge her own path, or stay in the "perfect" box designed for her...
Content and/or Trigger Warning: depression, anxiety, self-harm, violence, sexual assault.
[[word count: 50,000-100,000 words]]