The Bad Jokes #1: The Redhead
  • Reads 766,641
  • Votes 21,276
  • Parts 25
  • Time 3h 32m
  • Reads 766,641
  • Votes 21,276
  • Parts 25
  • Time 3h 32m
Complete, First published Apr 18, 2022
Mature
My cousin always referred to us as the bad jokes, as in...a blonde, a brunette and a redhead walk into a bar. I'm the redhead, and this is my story.
When I was 18, a psychic told me to wait for the man with the scar. 
For five years I waited and then suddenly, there he was in front of me one night. No mistake -- this was the man.
We got off to a bad start, and I just kept making things worse chasing after him.
Until he let me know in no uncertain terms that he wasn't interested in me.
So I gave him what he wanted and ignored him.
Then he decided he wanted me.
And him getting me back was the least of our problems.
All Rights Reserved
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The Backpacker's Dream by CanisMajoris5
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'No, he didn't'. I was so shocked by the turn of events. Everything was going fine and then suddenly boom, everything turned upside down. I just couldn't believe this. What did he think of himself? 'Leave me alone.' I said firmly but his hold on me was so strong. I was struggling to get out of his bear hold but to no avail. 'Oh!! So, the poor lady thinks that I will leave her alone and just let her go free?' He had that evil laugh and boy, his breath stank. 'Man, you just signed your death warrant and I will do one favour on you.' No one messes with me. 'Ooooh, I am so scared that I almost peed my pants.' Again that idiotic laugh. I counted till 5 and then kicked right in his balls. I turned around and grabbed his hair from roots, jerked them so badly and then gave my hard elbow shot on his chin. Everything happened so fast for one moment he was standing and the other lying on floor wiggling. I charged at him with my cheetah speed, picked up a wooden rod and started hitting him wildly, 'You idiotic stinky breath was trying to steal my backpack. You are so dead.' 'Favour, favour, favour.' He was screaming in pain just after few seconds and was panting hard. I picked my paste from my bag and threw at him, 'Brush your teeth.' I was fuming. I turned around and saw him standing wide-eyed, 'Hi, I am Scarlett.' I smiled showing my 32 teeth. 'I am scared.' His look puzzled me. Starting date- November 5, 2019 Completed on - May 23, 2020 All Rights Reserved.
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The Backpacker's Dream

39 parts Complete

'No, he didn't'. I was so shocked by the turn of events. Everything was going fine and then suddenly boom, everything turned upside down. I just couldn't believe this. What did he think of himself? 'Leave me alone.' I said firmly but his hold on me was so strong. I was struggling to get out of his bear hold but to no avail. 'Oh!! So, the poor lady thinks that I will leave her alone and just let her go free?' He had that evil laugh and boy, his breath stank. 'Man, you just signed your death warrant and I will do one favour on you.' No one messes with me. 'Ooooh, I am so scared that I almost peed my pants.' Again that idiotic laugh. I counted till 5 and then kicked right in his balls. I turned around and grabbed his hair from roots, jerked them so badly and then gave my hard elbow shot on his chin. Everything happened so fast for one moment he was standing and the other lying on floor wiggling. I charged at him with my cheetah speed, picked up a wooden rod and started hitting him wildly, 'You idiotic stinky breath was trying to steal my backpack. You are so dead.' 'Favour, favour, favour.' He was screaming in pain just after few seconds and was panting hard. I picked my paste from my bag and threw at him, 'Brush your teeth.' I was fuming. I turned around and saw him standing wide-eyed, 'Hi, I am Scarlett.' I smiled showing my 32 teeth. 'I am scared.' His look puzzled me. Starting date- November 5, 2019 Completed on - May 23, 2020 All Rights Reserved.