The Bad Jokes #1: The Redhead - GroveltoHEA - Wattpad

The Bad Jokes #1: The Redhead

Reads 734,868
Votes 20,826
Parts 25
Time 3h 32m

Reads 734,868
Votes 20,826
Parts 25
Time 3h 32m

Mature

alpha angel angst angstwithhappyending bestfriends deceit grovel happyending humor hurtfulwords pranks romance romancestories scaredtolove scarred strong-female-character strong-heroine texttospeech wattpad

My cousin always referred to us as the bad jokes, as in...a blonde, a brunette and a redhead walk into a bar. I'm the redhead, and this is my story.
When I was 18, a psychic told me to wait for the man with the scar. 
For five years I waited and then suddenly, there he was in front of me one night. No mistake -- this was the man.
We got off to a bad start, and I just kept making things worse chasing after him.
Until he let me know in no uncertain terms that he wasn't interested in me.
So I gave him what he wanted and ignored him.
Then he decided he wanted me.
And him getting me back was the least of our problems.All Rights Reserved

alpha angel angst angstwithhappyending bestfriends deceit grovel happyending humor hurtfulwords pranks romance romancestories scaredtolove scarred strong-female-character strong-heroine texttospeech wattpad

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✔️𝑈𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑙 𝐷𝑒𝑎𝑡ℎ 𝐷𝑜 𝑈𝑠 𝐴𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑡.18+ by KIXKX_WRITES

"You're so wet,Kitten." He whispered in my ear. Making me shiver. His finger slowly,circulating on my clit. "You want to feel my big fingers in your pussy,yes?" I couldn't talk. It felt like my voice was gone. "Y-yes. Please,Xander." I breathed out. ___ WARNING THIS BOOK IS RAW MATERIAL,SO THERE IS GRAMMAR MISTAKES COVER BY:@AK_Writes Evangeline Salazar,19.She works at a little resturant called "The spark". She has a Boyfriend that's abusing her and has done that to her for almost 2 years. One night was the last time. She had enough. He has damged her already,in her opinion too much to ever be fixed. Broken. But what happens when her savior comes? Will they fall for eachother or will their worlds crash? Xander Dattilo,31. He grew up in Italy and has lived in New York for 6 years. He is rich, he has a lot of power and he is 'known' as cold,cruel and heart of stone. The people are just in his way. What happens when a person without a heart and a person with a heart merge? can their two different worlds work to be mixed or will they destroy each other?

On And Off Again. because it's meant to be by ScarlettSunset57

He slammed me against the wall which caused a groan to escape my mouth. He pressed his body against mine and I gasped. "Let me tell you something, Dimple. You are mine and I am yours. No one in between and no one out." The words flew out of his mouth and I stared at him in shock. Did he just say what I think he said? Holy mother fucking hell!! "Uh." My lips parted and his eyes zeroed to my lips. "Better close that mouth unless it's an invitation." He smirked.

A Lovable Disaster by Catalicious786

A story of love and hate and well...multiple disasters..Read on to find out😉 Excerpt: He took me to a dark lane through a passage between two dilapidated bungalows. We were alone. I already had that feeling in my gut when you feel like you are being touched the wrong way but I ignored it. He suddenly stopped walking, looked at me with his ugly face and even uglier smile and remarked,"Won't I get a kiss?" "I don't know about that..." "But you promised.. Remember?? you pinky promised." "Umm..I didn't think you would actually do it.." "Well we are alone and there's no one..What is the problem?" The problem is you are ugly and I don't want to ruin my first kiss this way. "Do whatever you want."

Serendipity by Izzayy_k

"Kitten!" He said and I opened my eyes. As I looked ahead at the mirror, I could see him leaning so close to me but his eyes were gazing at me through the mirror. For a moment we both were lost in each other eyes, his eyes held amusement and mine held fear. I don't know why but his presence scares me and angers me at the same time. But I learned my lesson to keep anger at bay in front of him! "Are you scared of me?" He smirked and I shivered in fear. His eyes shone as he realized I am scared of him. He likes that I am scared of him and this pisses me off a little. "No...I am not!" I told him slowly and then he chuckled and I gulped because that laugh was demonic and dry as if he is taunting me. "But you should be," he said. ****************************************** This is a story of a girl named Alara who lives with her two brothers the most important people in her life who never made her ever feel the loss of their parents. They were always there for her whenever she needed them, her best friends. She met a guy named Hunter who was always so rude and cold to her. She disliked him the moment she saw him but then he woke up another feeling in her which was only reserved for one person, a person who broke her heart like no one ever had. What will happen when fate will play its part? What will happen when all the secrets will be out?

Finding Carla by CYDream1

She was living an ordinary life until he came into her life.... The past that she has always known may not be what she thought all along.... Secrets will be revealed.... Fall in love with Carla and Santi in this heartwarming story with a twist of humor and surprises about finding oneself and finding love in the process.... A story about love, friendship and family.... Excerpt: "So, are you saying that I look gorgeous like my mom?" I teased her. She blushed at my question. "Admit it. You found me sexy the first time you saw me. I remembered you checking me out." I continued teasing her. She turned crimson red with my remark. "Of course not! You're so full of yourself! You arrogant prick!" She was about to punch me again, but I caught her hand and held it. I love the feel of her hand against mine. I squeezed it gently. I felt her suddenly tense up. She removed her hand from my grip and I hesitantly let it go. I could tell she felt awkward, but it felt natural to me. Like her hand was meant to be molded next to mine....

Chase Me by Serena_salfator

"Y-you can't run away you have our baby," he says screaming "Bella Open the door" He yells and hits the window. "Please come back baby I'm sorry!" He looks at me and through the window, I can tell he isn't sorry. "I'm sorry" he repeats and I feel tears coming. "You...hit me" I sob. "I didn't mean to I was drunk!" he taps the window "Please baby I will work on myself, just get inside" He whispers. I start panicking. What happens when he finds me? Will he hurt me? Or kill me? I lock the car and turn the engine on. "baby please please" He sobs. I drive out of the garage and start the GPS. Once I do that I stop on the light and put my hand on my bump. "It's just you and me, " I rub my belly and start driving. This is it.

Peace Offering// Jason McCann by pineapplesgur

we go around at night. we fight & we kill. notice I said "we" it's myself and my cousin we are America's most wanted. people want to see us so bad. but if we've been seen,you will be lost and when found you will be dead...ATLEAST you died knowing what we look like right? no.. that didn't lighten the mood..okay... read my story it's the perfect mystery, funny, deadly, bloody, adventoures,and we can't forget love story. copyright to pineapplesgur you cannot copy my story if you want to put it in another app or language or something ASK ME!!

His Girl by storyteller812

"There's my girl!" I felt four sets of eyes shift to me; instead of making eye contact, I shifted my gaze to the floor. "Don't just stand there! Come here!" The threat in his voice was obvious, so I did what I was told, knowing there would be consequences if I didn't. I shuffled further into the room, still staring down at the beige carpet. I felt his expectant gaze on my face, and I kept my legs going until his shoes came into view. His fingers gripped my chin, forcing me to face him. As my eyes met his chestnut brown pair, his hard stare bore into me, seeming to see my every thought. I tried to avoid his eyes, looking everywhere but those cold orbs. The hand that wasn't holding my chin managed to grab both of my wrists and pulled me so that I was sitting sideways on his lap. "How's my favorite girl?" I shivered from the touch of his breath on my neck. His arms wrapped around my waist like a cage, trapping me in. I'm fine, I'm ok. He wouldn't dare try something in front of other people. Highest Rankings: #1 in Used #1 in Intimidation #2 in Bruised #8 in Intimidation #141 in Like

Game-Lock by Kay_1o1

My mouth grew dry as I stared at the red eyes looking in our direction. My heart was racing fast as I was pressed tightly against Austin, who himself did his hardest not to move. I glanced at him for a second, and he was staring at me with a frown. Obviously my expression was revealing how terrified I was. I looked again at the eyes and took a deep breath in and out as it turned and slowly began to walk away. We were well hidden. It worked. *** I just wanted to spend my days in peace, streaming horror games and finding a way to move out of my parent's home. So when Thalia suggested I stream a new viral, horror game: Game-lock, I didn't think much of it. But Game-Lock is a trap, and now I am trapped in an actual horror game. In order for me to escape, I need to beat all 100 levels -- or die trying. But I am not alone. There are others in this server with me, sharing the exact same fate that I do. Austin, a man who knows how to fight, with his 12 year old nephew, Rey, a guy who never played a horror game before in his life but is quick on his feet, and Hayden, a flirt with good survival instincts. But if anyone knows anything about horror games, it's the fact that escaping horror game comes at a cost. There is no way we're coming back in one piece -- or alive. And there is far more to this game or to my teammates than what meets the eye... Book cover by: https://fabzdrawz.artstation.com/

We Can't Be Friends by MEJASTICA

It's always that simple like this time. My drunkard voice let it out, "We can't be friends, junior..." I don't know why did I say something LIKE that! But how could I tie those feelings behind my tongue when I just feel like I never gone through such thing. May be not NEVER; but surely since my nightmares captured my sleep. I never compromise myself for my heart whenever it beats for desire. Usually I don't own one. But deep down, for once, I let a chance for it to open up. Not because I want to show; only that I can't hide it anymore. How could I? After she stepped in my room, bed and my fucked up brain. She is... the visible serene of my mind, long after I lost someone like her. #Love❤️ #Lust💫 #Enemies to loves💕 #Humour🤣 #Teen fiction🎶 #University🎓 #Bad boy😎 @We can't be friends

Black & White by ali_cher

A story, in which a typical teenage girl falls for the school's bad boy. Except, she's not that typical and he's not that much of a bad boy. *** "If I told you that I care about you, more than anyone in your life does, would you believe me?" He asked me, his jaw clenched. I could tell he was furious. Yet somehow, I wasn't scared of him. "No" I shook my head bravely. "If I told you,'' He tried again, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath before continuing.''That you make me so fucking mad, I want to punch a fucking wall. What would you say?" He had me trapped now, my back painfully colliding with the wall behind me. I gasped at the impact, looking up into his icy grey eyes. They were cold, emotionless. As always. "Do it!" I dared him with the last ounce of courage I had left in me. The sound of his fist smashing through the wall right next to my head, made my ears ring for a brief moment. I opened my mouth to speak again, shaking slightly, only for him to pull away and leave me standing there alone. ____ !!Warning!! This story contains strong language, mature scenes, alcohol and drug consumption, and sensitive topics like - eating disorders, bullying, mental health, etc. ___ HIGHEST RANKINGS: 1st in #ed, 1st in #badboysgirl, 8th in #victim, 9th in #rehabilitation, 13th in #youngadult

Last Night: Taking Chances by TiaMsiza

Everyone's had a crush. It's a secret, painful, embarrassing, all consuming and more often than not, it's unrequited. What would happen if you took a chance and told your crush how you felt? If you had nothing to lose... •••••••••• "Yes Ally?" she heard him husk in her ear suddenly. She stiffened before forcing herself to relax and turn to face her best friend. "I didn't call you over here," she told him calmly. "I know but you were staring so hard I figured you needed something," he told her with his infuriating smirk. She smiled sweetly in return, "Now, what could I possibly want from you?" His eyes roamed over her face for a minute before his arm shot out and wrapped around her waist. She let out a surprised gasp as she suddenly found herself pressed up against him. She shivered involuntarily as she felt his breath fan her face and stiffened again as she realized how close his face was to her own. •••••••• A story about a group of friends going after the boys they've been secretly in love with for all of high school. It's the end of year senior party and it's now or never. They might not get the guy but they'll still have each other in the end.

Broken Girls And Broken Boys by amberrosie05

C O M P L E T E D "Date me," he spins the whiskey around in the glass and fixes me with a smirk. I roll my eyes the moment the words roll off his tongue. "Are you really that desperate?" I scoff in response, fighting back the ever prominent blush. His smirk widens as my face flushes red and he leans over the countertop towards me. I step back. "Name your price," he replies, his words cool and smooth like ice cream. Only I would reference food at a moment like this. Anger rolls around in the pit of my stomach; I may not have money but I have morals. "You can't buy people, Grant," The words fall out of my mouth and he recoils as if slapped. I'm glad. Stupid rich boy and his player ways. "Bet I can," I resist the urge to slap the smug look of his face and scoff again. "Right," I drag out the word, rolling my eyes. I step away from the counter and turn my back on him, desperate to leave. But he speaks again. "Date me. Two months. If you fall for me for my money, I win. If I fall for you for who you really are, you win." I consider this for a moment. I have nothing to loose and really not much to gain. But I'm so desperate to put the asshole in his place that I can't resist. I'm a sucker for a bet. "Deal."

#girlboss [COMPLETED] by anjanadstifler

"I love the view of the city from such a height at this late night." I said finally breaking the silence. "Me too." he said lost in his thoughts. "How will it be to fall from such a great height?" he asked me. Do I smell hate? Is he a psychic person? I looked at him horrified. He finally smirked at me. "Chill. I was just kidding. Or else it was pretty silent." he said and smiled. "Well it wasn't funny." I said twisting my mouth and started giggling. "Thanks for bringing me here." I said and did something which I would regret later.

My Poison ✔️ by Chxrrycottage

Bailey Pierce: Rich, strait A's, good friends, always happy, sweet, sarcastic. Bennett Hawthorne: Troubled, protective, couldn't care less about grades, caring. When Bennett and Bailey met, they both instantly had a thing for each other. But one of Bennett's rivals also has a thing for her and will stop at nothing to get her. <><><><><><> "Damn your weak as shit!" I laughed. My face hurt like a bitch but I wasn't going to tell him that. As my hands were swinging around, Ethan grabbed both my wrists and pushed them back onto the pillow on the bed. He picked my body up effortlessly throwing that on the bed. He pushed my wrists more into the pillow which began to hurt. "Say that again, darling." He put his face right in front of mine. "I dare you." His voice was just above a whisper. I thought about it for a minute. Saying it again would be the right thing to do but that could result in a lot of pain. If I didn't say it again though, he would call me weak and a pussy. I am neither of those things so I took a deep breath and repeated my statement. "You. Are. Weak. As shit. What was unclear about that?" I tilted my head taunting him further. <><><><><><> DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the images used however, all of the characters and plot details are my own work. Started: 6/30/23 Ended: 2/10/24 Finished editing: 2/21/24 ⚠️ WARNINGS⚠️ Violence & Gore SA & Abuse Alcohol & Drug Abuse Best rankings #5 in Freshman 1-14-24

The Deeper The Hate The Deeper The Love by myangelicstar

"How ...cc...cca....ccan you !! I..I don't believe these bullshits. Parth ...Parth!!!,I know this this is....this is just a joke, but it's not funny at all...just.. just say the truth", I asked him with love and hope in my eyes. "Hahahahaha",he laughed cruelly and held my shoulders tightly in his hands, "O my poor girl! You think I love you?? If so, then you are a big fool. The truth is that I hate you!!!I HATE YOUUU!!;I was just playing with you, and now my task is completed Miss. Akansha Corey". Meet Akansha Corey,19 years old, strong, determined, independent person who is working as a waitress as a part-time job to overcome her daily expenses. And also meet Parth Paxton,19 years old, arrogant, playboy, and the only son of Mr. Paxton who is a multimillionaire. Both of their life paths clashes with each other. Witness the roller-coaster ride of their lives. Disclaimer: This is my 1st book .Hope you will give this book a chance by reading it. Thank you all! Ranking: #1 in hurtfulwords on 21-08-2021 & 16-01-2022 #3 in romance-friendship on 03-08-2021 #7 in trust on 27-01-2022 #7 in collegestories on 02-02-2022 #9 in collegestudent on 27-08-2021

Strange Waters | ✔️ by shonderxo

"I'm not going to hurt you." He took his hands off my waist and placed them on either side of my head. "I could never hurt you." He lowered his face into my neck. His breath on my neck sent electricity down my spine. Being flustered, my breathing became heavier. But not in the same way as when I freak out. It's in a way I've never felt before. The same feeling from when I first met him came back. The tingling in my core. His long finger tucked a piece of my blonde hair behind my ear. "Anyone ever tell you your really short?" He whispered. "Anyone ever tell you your really tall?" I breathed out, pinning my hands below me. He moved his face even closer to mine if that's even possible. His lips grazed against my jawline. My eyes brows furrowed from how good it felt. "Wha- what are you doing?" I breathed heavily. "What I've been wanting to do since the second I saw you." He grabbed my face and slammed his lips into mine.

SWEET REVENGE by monica23031

The exact words he threw at my face still haunts my dreams every single night and I think I'm starting to believe him. "Wish I've never met you I was so young and stupid, no wonder no one wanted to be with you, you are just holding me down and I honestly just got bored, needed a new chapter in my life that was the main reason I did what I had to do to keep myself happy. I just don't want to lie to myself anymore. I can't do this. I need to be free for once in my life. I'm so relieved that I don't have to marry you anymore, it's like a dead weight lifted from my shoulders. JUST LEAVE! GET OUT NOW! '' I just didn't know what to do that day I way so shocked, one minute we were one big happy family and the next he throws everything we build up as a family. I should had been warned by his actions the last month that we spend together. He knew that he was my first for everything and that gave him a push on his ego. Always bragged about being my first and claiming power over the situation. I was blinded by all of his charms and I see that now, I'm so sorry I did not listen Laura, you were just trying to protect me , that's what best friends are for but I chose him and I am truly sorry. I promise I will get a way to show him that I am not just a waste of space and I am going to do it all just for me and my baby girl. **WARNING** Sexual language and mature content Read at own risk ;) https://www.buymeacoffee.com/Monicanaude

The Backpacker's Dream by CanisMajoris5

'No, he didn't'. I was so shocked by the turn of events. Everything was going fine and then suddenly boom, everything turned upside down. I just couldn't believe this. What did he think of himself? 'Leave me alone.' I said firmly but his hold on me was so strong. I was struggling to get out of his bear hold but to no avail. 'Oh!! So, the poor lady thinks that I will leave her alone and just let her go free?' He had that evil laugh and boy, his breath stank. 'Man, you just signed your death warrant and I will do one favour on you.' No one messes with me. 'Ooooh, I am so scared that I almost peed my pants.' Again that idiotic laugh. I counted till 5 and then kicked right in his balls. I turned around and grabbed his hair from roots, jerked them so badly and then gave my hard elbow shot on his chin. Everything happened so fast for one moment he was standing and the other lying on floor wiggling. I charged at him with my cheetah speed, picked up a wooden rod and started hitting him wildly, 'You idiotic stinky breath was trying to steal my backpack. You are so dead.' 'Favour, favour, favour.' He was screaming in pain just after few seconds and was panting hard. I picked my paste from my bag and threw at him, 'Brush your teeth.' I was fuming. I turned around and saw him standing wide-eyed, 'Hi, I am Scarlett.' I smiled showing my 32 teeth. 'I am scared.' His look puzzled me. Starting date- November 5, 2019 Completed on - May 23, 2020 All Rights Reserved.

Trust in You by adelwang

I woke up in the morning and felt the pain in a place I've never hurt before. I took a peek at my own body, and my mind went blank. My eyes found a man who was lying beside me, sleeping, and my mind brought me back to me all the crazy things that happened last night. My 2 years boyfriend dumped me, I was drunk and went to my hotel room alone. Someone climbed on me. To say that he was handsome is an understatement. If an angel could marry a devil, then I'm sure he was their son. But that was not the point! He came to me and kissed me. One thing led to another.. God! This guy took my virginity. And that was not the worst. Guess what! He was my new boss. I was his new executive assistant. To top it, my ex boyfriend accused my boss that he raped me. What should I do? Trust my ex boyfriend who just dumped me? Or.. trust my new boss who was sexy as hell (that's not the point, by the way) and the one who took my virginity? Words {[150.000-200.000]} First Chapter published on July 4th , 2020.

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Slide 1 of 20

✔️𝑈𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑙 𝐷𝑒𝑎𝑡ℎ 𝐷𝑜 𝑈𝑠 𝐴𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑡.18+ cover

On And Off Again. because it's meant to be cover

A Lovable Disaster cover

Serendipity cover

Finding Carla cover

Peace Offering// Jason McCann cover

Game-Lock cover

We Can't Be Friends cover

Black & White cover

Last Night: Taking Chances cover

Broken Girls And Broken Boys cover

#girlboss [COMPLETED] cover

My Poison ✔️ cover

The Deeper The Hate The Deeper The Love cover

Strange Waters | ✔️ cover

SWEET REVENGE cover

The Backpacker's Dream cover

Trust in You cover

✔️𝑈𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑙 𝐷𝑒𝑎𝑡ℎ 𝐷𝑜 𝑈𝑠 𝐴𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑡.18+

"You're so wet,Kitten." He whispered in my ear. Making me shiver. His finger slowly,circulating on my clit. "You want to feel my big fingers in your pussy,yes?" I couldn't talk. It felt like my voice was gone. "Y-yes. Please,Xander." I breathed out. ___ WARNING THIS BOOK IS RAW MATERIAL,SO THERE IS GRAMMAR MISTAKES COVER BY:@AK_Writes Evangeline Salazar,19.She works at a little resturant called "The spark". She has a Boyfriend that's abusing her and has done that to her for almost 2 years. One night was the last time. She had enough. He has damged her already,in her opinion too much to ever be fixed. Broken. But what happens when her savior comes? Will they fall for eachother or will their worlds crash? Xander Dattilo,31. He grew up in Italy and has lived in New York for 6 years. He is rich, he has a lot of power and he is 'known' as cold,cruel and heart of stone. The people are just in his way. What happens when a person without a heart and a person with a heart merge? can their two different worlds work to be mixed or will they destroy each other?