Crushed

Your curvy tattooed body fair and perfect.
Laying on your chest, as you touched my body tenderly.
My mind wondered, does he love me? will he hurt me?
You whispered in my ear with your warm breath "I love you".
I believed because i keep giving myself chances.
You make so much memories of yourself that they killed me.
But you keep making me alive each time i die.
Your caring touch and kisses all wrapped in the meaningless words you say, which seem to speak so much life into me.
I loved you sincerely, but all of it to you was infatuation and a practiced routine.
I became lesser existent to you.
Then i finally exploded after you break my heart and all your promises.
And everything became clear to me.
Then i realized i knew it all along, but blinded by your deception i fell.
I blame myself for it all because i was told.
But that doesn't lessen my shattered heart's pain.
It happened so much that it has become a cycle, which i can never get use to.
Feeling loved, to realizing i was deceived to CRUSHED.