Yeah, I'm "that girl"

Yeah, I'm "that girl"

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Sun, Jan 25, 2015
So…it´s like this people don’t like me but it doesn’t matter i also don’t like people. I should probably introduce myself.&amp;nbsp; I’m Jules, yeah i know it’s a guy name but who cares?! My parents were probably high when they decid to give me this name…but going back to intruducing myself,&amp;nbsp; I’m Jules but everybody knows me by “That girl” witch is kind of funny i hate stereotypes but i call myself “that girl” too. I’m 17, like i said people don’t like me and i don’t like people, i’m not gonna&amp;nbsp; describe &amp;nbsp;myself physically because i think that would like distracted you people from what matters…damn that’s gonna be hard cause well people will describe me…and…yeah i’m not going to but forward in the history other people will &amp;nbsp;describe me. Along the history you will see that my life isn’t what it looks. People hate me but when someone &amp;nbsp;it’s down it’s me that person is going to talk to, when someone needs help with school it’s me she’s going to ask help, when someone needs to tell a secret that person will with out any doubts tell me and that’s a big mistake cause i know what they talk a bout me *and that’s not pretty* and they do a lot of shit to me so sometimes there little big secrets come out in public and they are so dumb that they don’t even understand that’s me who does that…well anyway karma sucks J, you are probably thinking i’m a bitch but you will understand why i act like this...well i think that’s all…oh no, i almost forgot this but guys are assholes to me they say i’m weird and in the next minute they are trying to have sex with me i just don’t understand they don’t like me but i can have them if i want to that’s realy fucks me up *not in the sexual way i mean i did things that i regret but dfjhlwirfuj you know*, i think now i said everything and if i didn’t well…you will see if you read the rest.
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Loneliness. Depression. Broken. Scared. Devastated. Hopeless. Mournful. Disheartening. Bleak. Joyless. Somber. I have no one. Depression and Loneliness are the only things I feel. My family tries to make me happy, but I just put on a fake smile and cry about it in my room. They act like everything is alright, but everything is not. They KNOW I was devastated about Mom's murder. They KNOW I was heartbroken about Dad's sickness that eventually killed him. That's all I've thought about. Devastation and heartbroken. Just because of those two things. Never in my life I have been this devastating. Dayton, Hayden, Angel, or Monica know how to make me truly happy. Not even my own siblings know how to make me show a real smile. Suicide is all I can think about day to day and I've almost died because of that. DEPRESSION IS A REAL THING. NO ONE KNOWS HOW I FEEL EVERYDAY. NO ONE CAN JUDGE OTHERS ABOUT DEPRESSION OR EVEN MAKE JOKES ABOUT IT BECAUSE ITS A REAL THING. DEPRESSION HAS KILLED PEOPLE. EVERYONE IN MY LIFE JUDGES ME JUST BECAUSE I DON'T SMILE, LAUGH, HUG, OR DO ANYTHING NORMAL PEOPLE DO. I CUT MYSELF, I CRY, I YELL, I VENT, I PUSH PEOPLE OUT OF MY LIFE. Those are the things people are worried about me. "Go kill yourself and join your parents in hell." They say and I just shrug it off and find a private place to hide and cry it out. "I CAN'T DEAL WITH LIFE ANYMORE!!!!" I say and I use my sharp nails and cut myself then cry some more. A gun is buried within my arm for defense from my dad, but I use it in case I am tired of society. Then that's when I met the Host Club. They saw my sadness and made me a part of it to repay my debt for accidentally breaking a vase. I am now a Host for men to flatter them, but how can normal guys want me to be a Host when I wear lip earrings, eyeliner, chains, and have a gun in my arm? I'm the definition of Hell. Then he made me smile again, something that I thought I would never get back. Happiness.

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