Numb

Being unhappy is a easy thing to hide. Being unhappy is also a very difficult thing to hide. I know from personal experiences that sadness is a completely overwhelming, enthralling, feeling. It's also addicting. When you get that first gut-wrenching feeling that everything is over, that your reason for happiness is gone, your adrenaline starts pumping. Whether you know it or not. But when you feel inside, that something is wrong, as human beings, your first instinct is to learn, to get answers. We are all curious by nature, it's the way you learn that is addicting. We are taught that expressing your feelings is a good thing, that you feel better after.

But that's exactly it. That feeling of being overwhelmed by everything, by the simple things, is sometimes the only time you truly feel. Then the short-lived feeling of relief, of weightlessness afterwards is something you've wanted to feel, what seems like, all your life. Wanting to feel this, is why you run back to the pit of sadness because you want to feel. So much so, that you develop a high off of this relief. Where that relief is something everyone dies for. But within this cycle of pain, there is an everlasting fear for being

Numb.

Of not feeling anything. Because that constant reminder of sadness, of being utterly overwhelmed is what shows us we are alive, we are human. But somehow, some reason, we still feel alone in this pit.

The darkness consumes us whole.

And we are lost inside ourselves, or the empty people we have become. But I want-no need, to feel that pain again because I've been numb for too long.

~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~∆~

Check out the inside of the book to get the little prologue and if you decide to read this story, buckle up, we're going on a ride.
Note: I might change the title