The danger of secrets
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- Parts 1
Ongoing5m
Last published Tue, Feb 24, 2015
I feel the cold pavement pressing against my back. Warm liquid drenches my shirt and a sharp and throbbing pain in my abdomen. I let out a small whimper. I know He can hear me. He has always had a good ear. I hear His footsteps near my limp body. My eyes pop open and it takes a second to adjust to the night. I look up to meet Him face to face. My breath gets caught in my throat. He leans down to place his lips to my ear. His lips brush my skin and I shiver, remembering the previous moments we have shared like this. He whispers calming words but all I can do is focus on his hand that is slowly rising and as it does so does the knife he was gripping with white knuckles. My eyes caught on the edge of the knife where drops of blood drip down to my face, trickling down my cheek and down to my cold, clammy skin. The knife slowly nears my neck. Closer and closer it comes. Yet, He still whispers those terrifying and innocent words. Terror freezes my body as I feel warm tears stream down my face. The knife swings down to my throat and I let out an ear piercing scream.
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"Can you forget about me...?" I asked him as we stood in the frozen night. He shook his head. I smile, "Well, in that case..." I pause to step back a bit and look up at him. "I'm sorry...," With that, I fall back and into the river. All I could feel was the icey water slowly filling my lungs and then... 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬. I never meant for him to fall in love with me. However, when I woke up, I woke up in a white room, "A hospital room...?" I thought to myself. I look around wondering how and why I was here...and then I see him... right next to me. I slightly frowned and tried to get up. He gently placed a hand on my shoulder, urging me to lie back down. I fought against him, trying to get away from him. But he held me firmly, his eyes filled with concern and love. "Please, calm down. You scared me when you fell into the river. I thought I had lost you," he whispered, his voice breaking with emotion. I stopped struggling and looked into his eyes, seeing the pain and fear that I had caused him. I then looked down as I said, "I thought I'd make it easier for you." His face paled. "What do you mean?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. I took a deep breath and confessed, "I never wanted you to fall in love with me." I say. He looked at me in shock, his grip on my shoulder loosening. "Why would you say that? Why would you think that would be easier for me?" he asked, his voice filled with confusion and hurt. I closed my eyes, unable to meet his gaze as I replied, "Because I don't deserve your love. I'm not who you think I am." He sat there in silence, processing my words. And then, without warning, he leaned in and kissed me softly on the lips. I pulled away, stunned by his action. "I don't care who you think you are. I love you, for you dumbass," he said.
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